for the $5 towards the Snoop Deville. Despite what some of the critics say, I could sell-out more, and it’s nice that some of the strangers out there don’t need pop-up ads and full-page specials to help me get closer to my dream of a new Cadillac. Take a hint from JC, lurkers and see your initials on this very page. We’re at $308, people, quite a nice start, so thank you to all.

For all of you who think that it’s always warm in L.A., take solice in knowing I went to bed in a tshirt and a ski-sweater last night and I had my space heater on for a couple of hours. It’s butt cold and here in Hollywood people have broken out with the pea coats and the scarves and the mittens. Only thing worse than cold: cold with no snow.

Saw my breath this morn as I walked from the bus to my palacial office and I saw the guy who rakes cigarette butts and trash from the sidewalks and I thought, “at least I don’t have that job. Poor guy can’t even persuade his boss to get him a proper push-broom.” Passed by the guy who mops the mosiac entry way of the El Rey theatre and I thought, “damn good thing I dont have that guy’s job.” Then I passed by the homeless guy who sleeps in the nook in front of the drug store, he had a couple of empty bottles of Gatorade beside him, a thin blanket over him, and a flattened out cardboard box underneath him, and several cigarette butts neatly arranged next to his shopping cart and I said, “if i ever bitch about my amazing life I am a dickhead.”

And then I saw an asshole in a corvette on his cell phone and I instantly got jealous again.

Watched “Fear Factor” for the first time last night. The put celebs on it last night. Made them stick their heads in a box. Then they poured scorpions and maggots and spiders in there. Sick! Got me to watch nearly ten minutes of it, till the teen called.

She invited me to spend Christmas in Las Vegas, something I would have never considered until I thought of you, gentle readers, and what a nice title that is for a piece of semi-fiction. So I gave her a sincere “I’ll think about it.”

Once I made it into the office I turned the corner and locked eyes with the only girl here who refuses to say hi to me. Shes cute as hell, has great hair and this bitchy attitude that I find irresistable in some young women. Most human beings, when caught looking into the eyes of a co-worker WHO THEY SEE EVERY DAY will automatically do something polite, like smile or say hello or grunt or blush or something. Not her. Which only makes her seem that more intriguing and catapults her to top of the list of suspects that I will break the ice with at the drunkfest called the Company Christmas Party which will be held in a few weeks. Stay tuned.

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