i dont know why people hate michael jackson so much

i can relate to him.

most the times when i go out with hot chicks i feel like a freak.

i feel like nothing that i wear looks cool.

i feel like my nose looks fucked up and my makeup is on wrong.

i feel like no matter what the girl is dressed like, shes always a hundred times hotter and more together than i ever will be.

i feel like im still putting out big hits and some of your favorite stuff is from me, but it’s not enough.

i feel like i could dance or sing better than anyone and people would just clap and say, so, thats what we expected. please bring on jimmy fallon now, hes cute. talentless, but cute.

one day michael jackson will get tired of this nonsense that gets heaped on him and either he will just go away like people say that they want him to do, or he’ll shoot himself, or he’ll just die.

or maybe he will come out with the best album ever.

again.

but odds are he’ll just shoot himself.

and no one will be surprised.

and then everyone will say they loved him

secretly

and the kids will all cry

and maybe some will feel embarrased

and the scumbags will dig up more dirty shit

like thats a hard thing to do

about any of us.

your pal,

elvis