sometimes i like to watch games by myself. last night i didnt want anyone over but whalen from tsar was so excited about all of this that i said fine, then os called up, then basart wanted to join in, and i didnt want to be mean to anyone or be negative or anything at all incase it would bring about bad karma, so i got off work a little early, took a shower and opened my home to my friends.

whalen is a rock star, and looks even moreso with his newly dark dyed hair and had all these funny theories. he kept saying that his dodgers would have done a lot better this year if only the pitchers would have hit better.

i blame the pitchers, he said.

and we laughed.

and then kerry wood, one of the two pitching aces of the cubs got two super-important hits and i screamed THE WHALEN THEORY IN FULL EFFECT! and we high fived each other and drank beer and rum and ate pizza and laughed and laughed.

ah, thank you atlanta for making me so happy.

jeff hasnt been watching baseball for all that long, but recently he has been watching it like a hawk, and was asking me all these questions about the rules.

hey tony, can a pitcher shave off his goatee in between innings?

hmmm, yes, i guess so.

can he return with a big fake moustache?

hahahahaha, dont think so.

but he did stump me on this one:

hey tony, if a pitch hits the ground and bounces before it crosses the plate, what happens if the batter hits it?

i wanted to say it would be a foul ball, but after thinking about it, the batter would be punished with a strike or a strike out if he swung and missed, so now im thinking if he hit it it would count as a hit.

any experts out there?

so today i didnt shave, im wearing the same red-billed cubs hat that i wore yesterday, i have invited my friends back over to the pad, and we will imbibe on more beer and rum.

and this time mr. carlos zambrano will take it to the braves and the flukey mike hampton.

cubs all the way, people.

totally awesome + future world ruler + prison guard tells all