that girl always wants attention. i dont know why she wants so much attention from me specifically but she does.
this morning she called and threatened to release our library of sex tapes. i begged her not to.
she said, what do you care, you did me like a porn star.
i said, im far too popular of a blogger to have a scandal like that hit the presses.
she said, but our tape could be out in time for christmas.
im not looking forward to christmas.
i have to work on christmas eve. and i cant go home. and i cant really buy a lot of presents for the poor kids in my neighborhood.
and i cant be with my true love.
and i cant be with my true lust.
so it will be hard to get in the christmas spirit, which my drug store and mall are trying to get me into right now.
and mariah said, see, so lets release our tapes, they could be a dvd box set.
i said, can i provide an audio track of commentary.
she asked, can we both?
i said, why dont i make some commentary on my track, and you sing on yours?
and she said, its a deal.
and then i went to my cupboard and whipped up some brownies,
wrote a chapter in my very slow-developing novel,
burned a cd for my man ben who has been driving me to work this week.
and i uploaded some pictures that i took.
and thats what i did after the tsar show last night.