VBugn: my boss is crazy and there are crazy people running around
VBugn: they filmed a porn there one day
VBugn: and a rap video another day
VBugn: last night there were two fights
VBugn: and two different girls running around in see through shirts with no bras on
VBugn: and one night we got raided for underage drinking and all the bartenders got arrested for serving to minors, but I wasn’t a bartender yet
me: are you a bartender now?
VBugn: yeah
VBugn: cause the girls who got arrested didn’t want to work there anymore
me: why would two girls wear see through shirts and no bras?
VBugn: I don’t know they just were
VBugn: and they didn’t know eachother, it just happened that way
me: i hear miami can be quite nudey
VBugn: yeah there is a lot of it
me: do guys get nude too?
VBugn: South Beach is a topless beach, and there is an all nude beach a few miles up
VBugn: but as for walking down the street, I haven’t seen any naked boys, just girls
me: you said in your 100 Things that you were in a porn
me: was it the one you just wrote about?
VBugn: yeah I was an extra
me: were you naked?
VBugn: no i was bartending
VBugn: and trying to hide my face
me: are underage drinkers good tippers?
VBugn: no
VBugn: but we don’t cater to the classiest crowd, so there aren’t a lot of good tippers
me: how long have you been bartending there?
VBugn: just since October
me: how often do you get hit on a night?
VBugn: asked for my number? About 10
VBugn: Told I am beautiful? Maybe 50
VBugn: It gets worse as the night goes on
VBugn: and I have learned that I can’t tell anyone that I have aboyfriend, cause then they stop giving me their money
me: you have a boyfriend?
me: interview over!
me: if you didnt have a live-in boyfriend, how many of those 10 guys a night would you give your number out to?
VBugn: Ohh none, cause one time I did give out my phone number, and I dont remember to who, but I am still getting harassing phone calls every weekend
VBugn: “Hey baby I want to lick your muff” type phone calls
VBugn: So I learned my lesson there
VBugn: and I got propositioned for a threesome by one table in VIP when I was doing bottle service
me: niiiice
VBugn: “My girlfriend wants to take you home with us”
me: were they hot?
VBugn: the girl was, but the boy had some long hair mullet type thing going
me: rejected because of his mullet
VBugn: someone should let him know
me: i thought half of miami still had mullets
VBugn: I think they progressed out of the eighties a few years ago
me: what are your work hours?
VBugn: from 10PM till five or six AM
VBugn: but by the time I leave I am generally pretty buzzed and we go out after
me: where can you go at 6am?
VBugn: Downtown they have afterhours clubs that are open till 2PM
me: thats insane
VBugn: one has a really fun outside room where you can go out and the sun comes up and they are blaring techno and its great
VBugn: yeah, kinda crazy
VBugn: but fun
me: whats been the best night for you working, tip-wise?
VBugn: I made about $300
me: very nice!
me: whats been the worst?
VBugn: Oh when we first opened
VBugn: We would have some nights when three people walked in the front door
me: what is bottle service? hustling people to see if they want bottles of champagne?
VBugn: yeah or bottle of vodka or anything else
VBugn: a bottle of Absolut goes for $180 plus 20% tip
me: how many bottles will people buy in a night?
VBugn: Um, a bunch? My girl Elaina does the bottle service and on a good night she will leave with around $500 or $600
VBugn: And we have some guys come in, friends with the owners, and they love to give away $100 tips at a time
me: meet any famous people?
VBugn: not at work, unless you count some no name rappers whose names i can’t remember
VBugn: and the porn stars, of course
me: nice
VBugn: I almost forgot, people ask me for drugs all the time at work- “Hey, bartender, do you know where I could get some E?”
VBugn: and someone from work brought me and one other girl to a swingers club with some super rich guys cause they needed girls to be able to get in
me: wow!
VBugn: and we immediately left, but still, I accompanied my coworkers to a swingers club
me: were the people normal lookin?
VBugn: My coworker stayed
VBugn: very normal looking
VBugn: you had to be in a towel
VBugn: and there were just people fucking, and other people watching and there was porn playing
VBugn: it was surreal
VBugn: and I was WAY too sober
me: your coworker must be insane?
VBugn: completely
VBugn: and married
VBugn: but he lives in the club during the weekends
VBugn: doesn’t have a house in South Beach, just lives in an office with his brothers during the weekends
VBugn: four of them in one office
VBugn: I remembered all this stuff while I was at work tonight and thought “Oh I Have to remember to tell Tony”
me: what if you walked into that swingers club with a disease?
VBugn: I don’t know
VBugn: I honestly don’t know. I looked around and ran back out the front door.
me: if you just wanted to get naked and join in would anyone have stopped you?
VBugn: nope
me: then that place is dangerous
VBugn: I think so too
me: ok, i think this concludes Tell Me About Your Job
me: thank you for playing
me: was there anything youd like to add?
VBugn: thanks for asking
VBugn: before this i worked at TGI Fridays
VBugn: “Hi my name is Stephanie and I will be your server today”
me: i think i would be more likely to hit on you there than at a bar
VBugn: and I had someone thrown out for saying that he wanted to suck on my tittie milk
me: THAT WAS ME!
VBugn: yeah, you are normal
VBugn: Oh shit! SorryTOny.
VBugn: Why didn’t you say anything?
me: i thought youd forgotten
steph does southbeach + 3rd Leg + kool keith