you will never own me.

fine murdoch and disney and viacom and clear channel.

fuck if i care. in fact if you want me to list other rich white men that you should fine i think i could do that for you.

brotha.

the way i see it these are your last days of disco anyways so party up.

the kids are about to take over and the kids arent buying your bullshit that obscene language or nipples actually cause any damage on anyone. especially kids.

what causes damage to people are

automobiles

cigarettes

booze

other people

war

titties and nipples arent even in the top forty.

neither is the word fuck.

the kids know this.

you know it too but you pretend not to.

and that would make you eligible for name calling.

the kids that i speak of right now are in chat rooms, on message boards, and playing online games.

all theyre doing is talking shit to each other, insulting total strangers using foul language that immediately turns sexual in violently creative ways.

nicolette sheridans bare back means nothing to them.

and thats why i love them.

and thats why i spend each day giving them every tip that i know. and at 111 years old i have my fair share.

todays tip is

this soon shall pass.

youre old, big brother.

everything youve done these last four years have only proven that the only thing youre any good at is winning elections, dividing the nation, giving the world a reason to hate us, and killing off our brave soldiers.

piss on the constitution all you want

youre dying the same way you lived

predictably

gutlessly

and godlessly dishonest.

you act as if this isnt the biggest strongest greatest smartest nation

ever.

you act like you have little mans syndrome.

you act like someone is smarter than you

you act like if given a fair fight youd lose

so you cheat

and somehow you still lose.

and you’ll never own me.

and when the first kid makes it to the top

and looks right in to the camera

and when that red light comes on

she’ll smile and say

fuck.

flagrant + terra + anti + paige

wants to know if Walt Disney would be “proud” of the controversy swirling around a silly piece that ran before the start of Monday Night Football this week.

but before we get any further let me clearly state for the record this:

fuck michael powell

who has done nothing, ever, to make anyone proud.

in the MNF mini-skit Terrell Owens is in the Eagles lockerroom and and Nichole Sherridan drops her shirt to persuade the wide receiver to be tardy for the begining of the game. apparently she really needs a good hug.

owens, the league’s flashiest and best receiver, obliges and the silliness fades out.

until the FCC decided to get involved.

despite the fact that there was no genitals or breasts or ass shown, despite the fact that all we saw of the desperate housewife’s body was the curve of her back, despite the fact that it was painfully obvious that the bit was comedy and simulated humour (and not simulated sex), the fcc chairman is looking into the handful of complaints that his office allegedly received over the 15 second goof.

and in a brazen bit of bias that is typically a no-no regarding open investigations, powell posed the hypothetical question regarding the dead disney.

powell asked the question because ABC which owns MNF and sherridan’s “desperate housewives” is owned by Disney.

as are the affiliates that run the oprah winfrey show, but when oprah received complaints this year about her discussion anal/oral sex and “rainbow parties” where teens would put lipstick on and give boys oral sex and later compare lipstick traces powell kept his big fat mouth shut and didnt speculate if mr. disney was proud about oprah’s subject matter.

but these are different days. bush has since been re-elected. the swagger that you see and the smile on the lips of the fcc chairman has amplified.

100,000 votes in ohio is all that seperated four more years or an entirely new direction but to those like powell who often sides with conservatives it was a mandate to crack down on anything that even hints at sexuality

except of course oprah.

owens clearly didnt miss any of the game, he caught three touchdowns, but powell doesnt care.

and powell certainly doesnt care about setting down clear guidelines for broadcasters to know what is out of bounds and what’s kosher.

how on gods green earth is a bare back indecent?

if michael powell wasnt an uncle tom sellout tool for the right and their neverending lust for control he’d write a book compiled by commisioners of the fcc, scholars, judges and lawmakers that would once and for all layout what is cool and what isnt cool.

but powell and his klan arent interested in playing fair, being fair, or speaking clearly. it’s gotcha politics intended to keep sexuality off of the public airwaves (unless the host’s first name begins with an o) while turning its back on violence and f-bombs.

their agenda is clear and with no one in any power to stop them even the curve of a back is grounds to send more chills through the already bland major networks.

bravo chairman powell, i didnt think you could deepthroat the agendas of the far right any better but with this latest move you simultaneously lick their nuts.

im sure your poppa is proud.

buzzmachine + hun + iron mouth

this should be the visuals to tsar’s new video of “wrong”

courtesy of metafilter, of course

and im drunk and its late so why not ripoff pay tribute to the fact that heather, who im proud to call an aquaintence got to be funny outside of the walls of salon and the rabbit blog.

below are the questions that they asked her, followed by my answers. and here are her answers.

1. Age and Occupation:

111, loser

2. How long have you lived in Los Angeles, and what neighborhood do you live in?

I moved to santa monica from illinios in 84, went to college in santa barbara, moved to atwater for a few years, moved to frisco for 4 years, then moved back to west la and westwood and then three years ago i moved to hollywood.

3. Where are you from?

hangover park, il

4. Is writing during your breaks at work best suited to your style?

it helps me sit still for fifteen minutes. otherwise im constant motion.

5. Since your job requires watching endless hours of crimefighting, what do you do to relax after a typical workday?

nerd out on yahoo fantasy basketball stats.

6. What purpose does writing the busblog serve for you?

everyone should have some sort of creative outlet. and if it can get you laid, then right on.

7. Living in Los Angeles means that you must come into frequent contact with people who work in television. If you socialize with TV writers and other professionals, is there any concern about potential conflict of interest issues? If so, how do you avoid them?

they still have tv writers?

8. Television and film commentators sometimes harbor aspirations to generate pop culture rather than exclusively critique it. Are you ever tempted to go to the “other side”?

one day i will create the new Forbidden Dance and hold pop culture in the palm of my hand. on that day the feeling shouldnt be temptation it should be guilt-free.

9. What’s your preferred mode of transportation?

karisas passenger seat.

10. How often do you ride the MTA subway or light rail?

twice a day.

11. What’s your favorite movie or TV show that’s based in LA?

the brady bunch

12. Other than “Lost,” are there any other new shows this season you think highly of, or don’t think highly of but enjoy?

family bonds, nanny 911, best week ever. i’ll miss bill mahers show.

13. Any thoughts on the Election Day broadcasts? Which network did you stay tuned to?

i have a two tuner tivo so i had one on fox and one on cbs. fuck the right, dan rather is a classic. and that fact that he knows hes under scrutiny and yet he still partied with calling the election is something you will never see from brian williams or any of the other sellouts like brit hume ever again. the age of anchors with a shred of personality are long gone. abecrombie and fratboy all growed up is where the future of network news is headed and thats why allah invented the internet.

i was invited to heathers but i didnt want to cry in front of everyone.

14. Did you think the “Hollywood community” made a difference in the election, or did its efforts only serve to expand the divide between Middle America and the supposed “liberal elite”?

if by the hollywood community you mean tim robbins and susan sarrandon, they cant even get people to go to the movies, and theyre movie actors. so i didnt think that theyd be all that effective in getting people to the polls.

middle america loves hollywood and the fact that they didnt do what celebrities asked them to do isnt middle america saying fuck you shuttup, its middle america politely making up its own mind.

15. Other than regular doses of the “Daily Show,” what other pop culture sources will help us make it through the next frightening four years?

i plan on learning about wines. im an adult now. i should really figure it all out. ive pretty much mastered all the other spirits.

16. It’s 9:30 pm on a Thursday. Where are you coming from and where are you going?

ive probably just started dinner and am downloading porn.

17. What is the “center” of LA to you?

amoeba records.

18. If you could live in any neighborhood or specific house in LA, where/ which would you choose?

malibu on pch right past the palisades.

19. What is the city’s greatest secret?

its diversity. i kissed like five girls last month. only one was white. love that.

20. Drinking, driving. They mix poorly, and yet they’re inexorably linked. How do you handle this conflict?

we live in the richest country in the world. if youre gonna spend $50 on drinks all night, spend $12 on a cab home. or the bus is just $1.25. one of the benefits of living in hollywood is either you can walk home from a bar or take a two minute busride.

21. Describe your best LA dining experience.

danielle and i took a long lunch, picked up palms thai, ate it at my house. it was a hot day and it was just so nice to not be at work for a few minutes.

we sang in the car on the ride back.

22. Do you find the threat of earthquakes preferable to the threat of hurricanes and long winters?

earthquakes are quick, easy, and then over. some of them are even cute like a hiccup from a sleeping child.

aint no cute hurricanes.

and fuck any temperature that doesnt start with a 7 or higher.

23. Where do you want to be when the Big One hits?

same place i wanna be under any circumstance, isla vista.

democracy of one + sean bonner hating on american airlines + zulieka + steve smith