“hang time”

palm reader says youre a libra on scorpio cusp
gemini rising
tony says youre a palm reader
your palm says see chart pick a card
one a hearts
dog barks someones at the door
kid opens, is ilka home
no
or do you want the bad news
gimme the good
youre capable of entirely anything
what about the bad
you said you only wanted the good
well now i want the bad
why
the little kids flipping past peoples court
news batman news news
turns off tv
slams nerfball
and right now youre in the middle of everything
but there are more paths than you think
show guts
and when you cant
pretend

“dr.”

they laid in bed.

it was dark

except for a few squares of

pearl blue

from the moon.

it had just snowed outside

but now it was too cold.

they were naked and warm beneath the sheets.

the heater had just clicked on again.

he thought she smelled nice

and he told her

quietly.

too .

what?

i said ilikedointhis

it was so quiet they could hear the neighbors wheels

as he drove behind the house

and the tires packed down the snow.

they were barely moving any more

and soon

they were asleep.

“open up”

theres a dingdong at my doorbell

and an angel says its comin

browneyed handsome man from memphis

but a guitar he aint strumming

Love has seen his time get shortchanged

through the southside of chicago

so he came to california

and the cops beat up his brother.

and the tears they have stopped flowing

and the boy he has stopped growing

but his heart it cant help knowing

that the time it sure is coming.

MLK Day comes but once a year

and the angel says get ready

for the tables set and waiting

sure your legs they both are steady

yes its true that im olde

i dont hump eight times a day, and when i do its slow and beautiful not manic and violent.

my neighbors dont complain any longer about noise or the mess cuz there isnt any.

the girls dont parade in and out, the randoms dont know where i live, the beer cans are no longer available for recycling outside my front porch.

i like warm oats in the mornings and long spa treatments in the eve.

im no longer reckless or trying to prove any points. i know where im perfect. i know they wont get it. i know what i need to know, and what i know is complete.

i know who are the liars the fakers the phonies and the sellouts.

and i know who are true at heart.

i have heard the most beautiful music there ever was.

ive seen the nakedest chicks

and ive tasted from the fountains of youth.

my cup hath runneth over in so many ways in so many areas that in order to deal with it, i often dumb myself down through tedium and alcohol. and then i watch television.

yes, im olde.

im so old i remember when there wasnt anything on tv.

i remember when there wasnt anything on the radio either.

we watched static on tv and we listened to morse code on the radio.

kids today have no imaginations. i blame hdtv.

in the old days, girls didnt just find your blog and send you nudes to your gmail, no you had to go out and club em and pull em back to your trailer by their hair.

one thing about those days though

there was something happening in music, especially in los angeles, that was amazing.

and strangely it was also happening, in a slightly different way in the twin cities of minneapolis – st.paul.

at the same time that prince was ruling the pop charts, other minnesota bands were laying down the foundations of what would a decade later be called grunge.

soul asylum, husker du, the jayhawks, and the mekons, would all have a home on the local twin/tone record label, but it was the Replacements that mattered the most.

verbungle today leads us to the now-defunct twin/tone webpage which provides us with a glimpse at the best band in america, as rolling stone magazine called them, way back when.

the replacements rocked that night at the famous First Ave., which most of you know from Prince’s film “Purple Rain.”

the mats that night were young, serious, as tight as theyd ever get, and decidedly sober. the year was 1981. ashley wasnt even born yet.

on bass you had tommy stinson who is currently axl rose’s bass player,

chris mars on drums

the dearly departed bob stinson on lead guitar

and the mighty paul westerberg on vox

and gibson sg.

im so old i remember rock music.

with simple lyrics for simple people.

“i hate music, its got too many notes”

im so old im being asked to adjurn to the hot tub.

ta.

the replacements live, 1981, quicktime required + metafilter + katie

the interview went well,

thank you. even though i said all the wrong things, even though i revealed too much, even though i promised them everything.

“so you’ll be our bitch?” they said. they being two hot runway models.

“yes, that is what im saying.”

98. aaron c.

sadly they had read much of this blog. so they had lots of questions about the xbi.

“show us your scars.”

“do you have bullet wounds?”

“is it hard to quit the xbi?”

“will you miss chopper one?”

i will miss chopper one. that was a tough question. i might even miss the busblog. no offense but what theyre offering is a super creative gig but its a small thing that could easilly be big if certain things begin to click.

and my intention is to help have those things click sooner rather than later.

meaning if there is going to be one casualty in all of this it might be the busblog, but let me tell you a little secret, when i got transferred to actually flying chopper one a few years ago, i sent myself to “hell” with kurdt kobain because i thought, “if im going to be up in the air flying around all day, im never going to be able to update this blog. therefore its gonna die, all because of a dumb job.”

well, we all know that the last two years of the busblog have been hugely successful, not work, not carpal, not crazy chicks coming and going, not the red state mandate, not anything stopped the busblog. if it did it got run over.

i will say this, however,

i am thinking about doing something very interesting on Thursday.

Thursday being the President’s inauguration.

Thursday being the day youre not supposed to buy anything, you should wear black, some arent going to work, and some will march in the streets to protest.

im thinking about turning the blog black

and i definitely wont be buying anything.

i know, sux for local businesses, but how punk rock if they all took the day off and draped their storefronts with black cloth too.

second interview is on wednesday which just happens to be the day i was taking off for my annual visit to the hollywood orphanage, which happens to be mere blocks away from where the prospective employment resides.

i said deliverables today

and i wore a sweater.

vote for coyote for best art/photo blog + reddit + welch and em return to civilization

how is it that ellen is getting hotter chicks than me?

i’ll tell you how, shes got a better job than me.

and a bigger dick.

although today karisa came over and i was simply wearing a towel and the girl is still losing weight on account of not having a drop to drink since the begining of the year

and i was all, dude you have no ass

and she was like, i have an ass, trust me.

but she has no ass.

but she kept turning around making me look at it.

and lil tone wanted to take a lil peekey boo but its sunday so i had to get up and finish shaving off four week beard.

in nine and a half hours i will be job interviewing for the job of my life.

i should go to sleep but how do you sleep with that going on.

this has been a very odd weekend.

it was super warm.

threeway chatted with raymi and matthew good but then karisa was here with little warning.

i talked to a woman who taught at the famous university that im applying to gradschool and not only did she remember meeting me years ago but totally remembered a poem i wrote and remembered that i had posted it twice.

and she had put it on her blog.

i asked her which one it was and she said it was about a prom queen

and i was all, me?

she was like, yes you!

i asked her if it was ok that i had some swear words in some of my poems

she was all, oh yeah.

and i was relieved.

but i still doubt that i will get in so in ten hours i have this interview for the greatest job for me of all time.

today karisa and i did laundry.

in my last perfect job i hired people for an internet company. i hired hundreds and hundreds.

karisa was the last person i was responsible for hiring.

she made me scrambled eggs today and a waffle.

this is what im going to say in the interview tomorrow.

i will do anything you want.

i will have more ideas than you can possibly imagine.

i dont care if you hate every idea and call me stupid. i am stupid.

i wont need a parking space, i dont need any supplies, i dont even need a phone, i could work from home if you prefer.

please let me start in two weeks.

i’ll pay you.

in my last job i took a 50% pay cut to stay there and work next to people like karisa.

theres nothing like a great job that youre perfect for.

and when i wake up, i’ll be a little closer to one.

all my readers are hot + colon cancer kills 44yr old exmcdonalds ceo + zulieka