with over 40 blogs, there are scores of writers to meet with, copy editors, editors, photographers, lawyers, and even occasionally possible subjects of stories who find their way on my calendar.

you might not have noticed, but after the cubs got swept by the dodgers, the finale of which i attended, my mind was rocked. nothing made any sense to me. nothing mattered any more. i was a rudderless ship. one that didnt even care if it got bashed against the rocks.

so when i got an email early this morning from one of my favorite writers and bloggers asking me if i would like to accompany him for a lunch meeting at the playboy mansion i said

fine, yeah, whatever

and then i snapped out of it, moved the one conflicting meeting to a different day, and said, hell yeahs, lets do this. and bro said, one catch, you’ve gotta drive

so we drove to the greatest mansion in LA in my old beater, eventually found the sorta hidden front gate, spoke to the voice in the rock, and drove up the famous driveway to probably the coolest house in the world.

we talked business the whole time and sat down to lunch in the dining room and was served by attentive waitstaff like as youd see in a old timey movie. all the different utensils that the three stooges fumbled with, all the politeness and grace that your mother instilled on you, little did she know that you’d have to use it one day in an actual mansion, if not the most notorious one.

near the end of the meal, almost as if it was scripted, one of hef’s girlfriends, kendra, walked into greet us with her playmate-worthy friend on their way to a tv interview show and she talked football beautifully and flipped through the new issue of the magazine to show our host (not hef, but his long time cohort) a thing or two.

afterwards we were given a generous tour of the grounds including the famous pool and grotto.

we fed grapes to some of the newest members of the house – the monkeys

toured my favorite room – the game room

and drove home even more confused by life, and how random it all is

and yet at the same time, far more focused, optimistic, and refreshed.

i know that sometimes its hard to believe in the midst of darkness that there very well might be light right around the corner

but i just saw it first hand, and it was stunning.

and now everything matters again.

then someone was offered to go to a swanky place for lunch

so someone said, i dont care. so someone is going a swanky place for lunch. in beverly hills.

inviter said, “i hear they have good food.”

again i repeated, dont care.

bro said, can you drive.

i said, dont care.

whats interesting about this one is it feels like a commercial for some of it, but then its all oh no this is about hookin up thanks to the financial crisis. wow, these really are modern timez.

check out more ICUs by katy newton here.

i said sure i do. she said then you wouldnt mind if i came over. i said i never minded when you came over. she said what if i stayed over. and again i said i never cared if you stayed over.

she said then what if i asked you to come over here. i was all, fine. she was like really? i said, what do i care. she said, what if i asked you to stay over here? i said, fine. who cares.

she said what if i asked you to be my boyfriend? i said, id be a lousy boyfriend right now. she said, but youd say yes cuz you say you dont care about anything. i said yes but id also be more likely to cheat cuz i dont care.

she said oh.

then she said, you wouldnt cheat on me. id give you everything you want.

i said, i want a world series champ. and i want you to dress like a ho 24/7.

she said 24/7?

she said, how about we just go to pinkberry.

i said, i dont care.

and thats why you saw me there.

photo by bgmaster via flickr

but maybe that means ive still got it.

or she an old soul.

anyways the pretenders were on letterman in the wee hours and i was shocked by how great this new song is. sorta like elvis costello lyrics with white stripes music.

the pretenders
“boots of chinese plastic”
from Break up the Concrete
which drops today

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo Buddha please
can you help a little peasant that’s begging on her knees
illusion fills my head like an empty can
spent a million lifetimes loving the same man

Whoa! Every drop that run through the vein
always makes it’s way back to the heart again
and by the way you look fantastic in your boots of chinese plastic

Hare Krishna, Hare Rama too,
Govinda I am still in love with you
I see you in the birds and in the trees
that’s why they call me Krishna Mayee

Whoa! Every drop that run through the vein
always makes it’s way back to the heart again
and by the way you look fantastic in your boots of chinese plastic

Hofra told us we should tolerate the people and the things that make me wanna hate
oh have a little mixed mercy on me, this seasoned beauty in this human pageantry
Jesus Christ came down here as a living man
if he can live a life of virtue then I hope I can
do unto others as you would have a turn
come back here and repeat until you learn, learn, learn

Whoa! Every drop that run through the vein
always makes it’s way back to the heart again
every dog that lived his life on a chain knows what it’s like WAITING FOR NOTHING!