have i mentioned i have the weirdest life?

so much so that honesty girl’s cousin drove me to work today and convinced me that these stories need to be written down.

these stories need to be written down, she told me.

i said if they were id be fired from my job, the girls i date would never talk to me again, the girls i wanna date would unfriend me on facebook, and my landlord would burn down my building.

she said, write it, hide it, and when the time is right, release it.

what if the times never right?

then call the book(s) Deathbed Confessions.

i told her to pull over so i could kiss her for the great idea.

she looked at me, smiled, checked her rear view, and parked in the emergency lane of the hollywood freeway and leaned over.

i said easy easy youre creasing my paper.

she said so?

i said, theres an iphone picture on the cover of the paper. its sorta historic.

she said i wonder if steve jobs is smiling on his deathbed?

i said, sick bed, not deathbead. but i bet hes totally smiling.

and as we pulled back into traffic we were smiling too.