theres a couple things nice about arizona


theres a lot of space and the weathers nice.

12821607_10153951176123057_3413603298478623251_nmaybe thats why they built a million baseball parks like it aint no thing.

today i took a dry run over to where the cubs play now in the spring.

no more HoHoKam Park, which is where i last saw the Cubs in spring training way back in the day.

now it’s Sloan Park named after the Chicago company Sloan Valve Co.


actually Sloan Valve Co has been making something very important for over the last 100 years.

in 1905 they created the Royal Flushometer, it is the magic that makes a toilet or urinal flush.

for the first few years sales suffered because people were still using outhouses

but in 1908, yes THAT 1908, shit went down and Sloan took off and have never looked back.

so what about these new no-flush urinals, hows Sloan gonna compete against these newfangled environmentally safer piss pots? have no fear, Sloan makes waterless urinals too, so relax.

Sloan Park can accompany 15,000 fans which is the most of any spring training facility.

all i know is they sell Portillo’s Italian Beef sandwiches.  let’s see if they still serve Old Style there

im in mesa, arizona

in n out

birthplace of the blues.

this is where the dreams start. the left side of the rainbow.

everyone comes to spring training with high hopes and visions of sparkly things.

except for the cubs.

i can’t remember one year when march rolled around and i was all

oh yeah

look out man

but this year everythings all butterflies and unicorns and gumdrop trees.

tomorrow im gonna eat from the gumdrop tree and tell you about it.

but first, a dip in the magic buttered hot tub.