it’s been over 30 hours since i’ve had food

i did have one banana.

been drinking this giant tub of water mixed with solution that “cleans you out”.

which is dumb because everyone knows a bottle of Groovy Grape from GNC does the same damn thing.

im nervous because i havent dranken all 4 liters of it yet and i hope that doesnt get in the way of the colonoscopy but my shits are liquid and yellowy and clear.

my mind is all over the place.

im not hungry, weirdly.

but i feel like im floating.

there are many stages to all of this. super bizarre. i should have demanded a morning appointment, but all they had was 1:30pm

i wonder about the poor. many of them go for a long time without food. that must be the hardest thing in the world.

this isn’t right.

my man ben works at the soup kitchen. met his pretty wife there.

i used to think soup kitchens are dumb, even though i love soup and kitchens and helping people.

i used to think, why dont they just get a giant bucket of soup and let people scoop it out themselves?

but i dont think thats the entire point.

the entire point might be more along the lines of human contact being necessary

eyes meeting eyes. greetings. hi. i hope you like this. i hope your day is better. i hope you know that all of this is just dust in the wind. that ours is something bigger somewhere else.

that you are me and we are all together.

i think thats the entire point.