Monthly Archives: September 2018

cubs played their last game of the season today

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and because they won, and because they have the same record as the milwaukee brewers, and because the cubs beat the brewers more than the brewers beat them this year

tomorrow they will play each other at wrigley field

to see who is the champion of the NL Central.

now the good news is whoever loses tomorrow is still in the playoffs because their records are so good

but the winner gets home field advantage through the playoffs

and they get an extra day off

two things the Cubs could seriously use.

i feel good about tomorrow because the Cubs are playing a lot better than they have the last month

and they’re at home, and they tend to beat the Brew Crew

and the Bears played incredibly today

and good things are happening to me personally

and the weather has been great

so tonight amber and i celebrated by going to sushi. she had just gotten a really good tip. we had soup and sushi and edamame. it was really nice. but the whole time i had a hard time relaxing

because once a week i have to do these check ins and

all i want is to be left alone when im being creative.

all i want is to be trusted.

youd think after over 50 years of rock n roll people would look at my record and know not only am i responsible but imma kick ass at what i set my mind to.

and lord knows my mind is set on this.

lets hope the Cubs are as motivated as i am.

 

courage is not an easy thing for everyone

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and just because someone either lacks backbone or always takes the easy way out doesn’t make them dishonorable or worthy of ridicule.

not everyone is cut out to stand in front of the group,

alone,

and say, no, this is the way.

that is true leadership, which has its roots in courage.

neither are easy.

but we saw it in spades with the good Doctor who testified so wonderfully yesterday.

however

we call Senators and Congresspeople political leaders because they have been chosen to assume that difficult role.

they are paid, they are given security, they are granted universal healthcare and excellent pensions, because they have asked and received the daunting task of being the voice in the wilderness to say

this is the way.

which is why when we watch what is happening in the Senate today, particularly in this vote for the would-be next Supreme Court Justice, there seems to be a giant lack of courage.

a pathetic evaporation of leadership,

and worse, a blind refusal at representative governance.

the people do not want this man on the bench, and yet the GOP Senators who could investigate the serious allegations against him do not have the gumption to stand apart from their partisan boys club and say

this is the way.

when this happens in the petty pace of day to day to the average man or woman, it can be forgiven, for a multitude of reasons.

but when actual leaders, who swore to protect and defend the country, not the party, give in to peer pressure or political pressures or the fear of reprisal, financial or otherwise,

it is disgusting and unforgivable.

courage is not an easy thing for anyone. our brains are programmed to protect the body from danger.

but there is no danger in doing what the heart knows is the right path.

ever.

Top 10 Lies Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh Told Today

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1. He said it was legal for him to  drink when he was a senior in high school. False

2. and 3.  He lied about the slang term “boof” and the “Devils Triangle” saying the former was about barfing and the latter was a version of Quarters, in truth they are about .

4. He originally swore he never drank in the summers on weekdays, but his trusty calendar ratted him out and had to admit to Cory Booker that he did, indeed drink on a weekday at Timmy’s, as his trusty calendar proved.

5. In a lie that only made him look like an asshole he told Kamala Harris that he didn’t watch Dr. Ford’s testimony. An aide says he was watching (which is probably why he came out with guns blazing).

6. When Sen. Harris asked him about polygraphs he said they’re unreliable. Not consistent to what he once said when he wasn’t one false move away from a lie detector.

7. According to his Yale classmate, he also lied about his drinking in college. Namely that he often drank to excess (more than The Card would have recommended).

8. He told Sen Blumenthal that the yearbook phrase Renate Alumnus was simply a G-rated friend thing and had nothing to do with sex, but his friend’s poem about her alluded what everyone knew, that they were calling her a slut: “You need a date / and it’s getting late / so don’t hesitate / to call Renate”. But the woman herself said that she did not take it as a compliment.

9. He said three witnesses have refuted Christine Blasey, not true. They just said they don’t remember.

10. He said he openly welcomed an FBI investigation, yep, lie.

The Daily Show had the funniest summary of the crazy exchanges

 

can i help you

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ive gotta wake up early to move the car and when i do the fog omg the fog

her name is %%! she answered the craigslist ad that amber put up

technically shes my afternoon girlfriend but we dont do nothin,

amber just doesnt want me to be lonely

i work all night, sometimes late enough to move the car before sleeping

around noon %%! knocked today waking me up, shes nice. not as pretty as amber

but i dont care.

after the cubs won the world series theres very little i care about other than amber.

%%! thinks i care too much. she could be right.

i care how long it takes amber to get home, i care what she eats and what she doesnt eat.

i buy her clothes and books and movie pass and ramen and bus tokens and massages

%%! is all, why dont you buy me anything and i say youre getting paid to sit there and paint your toe nails

she took the tuxedo off Prince yesterday and he went nuts scratching his wound

YOU CANT TAKE THAT OFF OF HIM UNTIL ITS READY

i yelled running to the hallway closet where the aloe lives

dabbed a heap of it on a wash rag and smeared it on his super gross bloody bald hairless gouge

slid his tux back on and he meowed in annoyed pain,

rolling onto his back trying to get at it

we cant get at it sweetie

%%! sighed

ever

Adios, Cos

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sometimes i feel bad for young people because they missed out on a great rock band or the thrill of being introduced to a new toy called Pong

but today they should be relieved that they were not around, and young, and black when The Cosby Show was around.

sure it was a hit show that everyone loved, but for black folk it was way different. sure we had seen blacks in Good Times – but they were super poor. And of course there was The Jeffersons (who even had a maid) but who could you relate to? George? Please.

while the Cosby show as also a bit too hard to believe with dad being this affable doctor and mom being the perfect lawyer who never seemed to take her work home with her, either you could see yourself as one of the kids – or you could see your friends in them very easily.

and the scenarios were also hugely relatable.

the show was so good, so heartwarming, so pure, that Bill Cosby could wear the ugliest sweaters and instead of thinking, holy God that’s ridiculous, you’d say, “well, I guess that’s a thing that really smart, rich people of color wear.” and sure enough, everyone started wearing Cosby Sweaters.

in a tv schedule flooded with white faces, to see the Cosby’s on top, week after week, year after year, gave families like mine the same warm feeling that my Asian friends basked in this summer with Crazy Rich Asians, and how many women and girls felt while watching Wonder Woman kick ass on the big screen: finally. Yes! Oh HELL YES!

and sure, some of the mighty fall. Mike Tyson, Pete Rose, Paris Hilton, Martha Stewart – all ended up on the wrong side of the prison cell. But Bill Cosby? the comedian who never swore? who weirdly told young rappers to pull up their pants?

who had a huge selling comedy album where Noah told God “riiiiight” when the Lord warned him about the Flood.

to have that guy end up being one of the most notoriously slimy rapists in US history is not just shocking, but almost unbelievable.

the only thing that makes it believable are the long history of other humans being horrible in the past.

but Mr. Jello Pudding? Mr. Hey Hey Hey it’s Fat Albert?

He knew he was a hero to black folk. He knew kids everywhere looked up to him for a million reasons. He knew that he had taken the road less traveled, the Good road, and it had paid off.

And all along he was being the worst?

If it was a script the studio boss would throw it on his huge desk and say riiiiiiight and kick out the idiot writer.

because neither he or his wife or any of his friends who may have known about this horrible behavior will admit it, it’s hard to learn and good lessons from this terrible tragic. but there are a few.

the most important being: we need to listen to the women and believe them when they say that weird shit went down. no matter who was behind it.

because if we had a culture that omg believed women and didn’t throw them to the lions any time they spoke up, there would have been fewer victims at his hands.

when i was a kid bill cosby was one of the biggest heroes ever. today he is one of the sickest victims. he belongs in jail.

likewise, the women accusing the current supreme court justice nominee of sexual crimes deserves to be heard, believed, and something needs to be done about it. otherwise we havent learned a damn thing.

today was a crazy day

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but it was also Sunday during the NFL season which meant all that mattered was one thing, and that is the Chicago Bears.

i know i know im working on a secret project

and the Repubs are trying to steamroll their naughty frat boy through the supreme court process

but morrissey announced that joan jett would be opening for him at his show in LA Live

and the Cubs beat the Sox

and these Cocoa Pebbles are delicious

and i did so much laundry

and yesterday i watched this insane kirk douglas movie where he played this crazy reporter out in the desert and this guy was stuck in a mine and kirk coulda saved him right away but he wanted the story to go on and on

and all these people showed up and there was a carnival and food and the train started stopping there

and old kirk started saying super nice things about the sherriff so in return the sheriff blocked the other reporters from doing things and eventually just made kirk a deputy

there is so much evil in the world. the bible tells us this too.

so much evil in there that the good book says things like

and then Ezekanazl was born and he did what was evil in the eyes of the Lord, as his father had done.

even back then. the good old days. the days before all the minorities showed up and ruined things by working for super cheap (or free) and accepting the scraps as if they were gold. even then people in power were being super selfish and mean to the less fortunate.

and every time a beggar asks me for money i think, am i being tested? and then i think, shit, they’re being tested and thats one i would fail: try to live in LA while being stinky and homeless and jobless and undereducated.

oh it was crazy out there, all right.

i read a bunch of Job and i dont know which way to go with it. he’s right to be pissed off, and his friends are right to tell him to trust God, but mama mia, theres another test i would fail and fail and fail.

once upon a time someone tried to take stuff away from me and i tried to reason with him but then it appeared that people wanted him to take things from me and i was all, am i the crazy one then?

so old Job must have thought, wait, i didnt do shit wrong, now my family dead, i got these bumps all over my face and my friends are saying i need to just put myself in time out. wtf is happening?

and the bible says, tonight wasn’t crazy, every day is crazy.

michael moore’s fahrenheit 11/9

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we forget about our ideals

we forget about the things that are important to us.

we let them deflect away from the concept by demonizing the politician

even though we all agree that all the politicians are lacking.

all of them.

ive loved every single one of my girlfriends so much, so deeply, so intensely, but ive lacked with each one, ive said stupid shit, ive not done certain things that would have made things easier and better and less smelly

and these are people who are getting naked in front of me

so of course politicians, strangers really, who cannot continue, they claim, without selling out a little to this one or that one — of course politicians are occasionally going to let us down in a big way.

this movie reminds us that we have to refocus back to the basic things that we want: a healthcare system that doesn’t bankrupt people, an electoral system where when you vote it matters, gun regulations that are written by people not lobbyists

but mostly this movie drives home the fact that this country believes in liberal values

big time

and the current day GOP has done nothing to change those values

meanwhile the democratic party has no one to blame except themselves for being such wimpy ass moderates

and not listening to their supporters who dont wanna be moderate about everything.

teachers shouldnt have to go on food stamps.

kids shouldnt have to worry about getting shot while in school.

the people of flint shouldnt have to worry that their drinking water is going to affect their freaking DNA for generations to come.

there should be no middle ground there.

for example, zero kids should be killed in school. if you want to call me a radical for not wanting to budge on that number, then fuck yeah, im a radical.

and fuck yeah am i happy that michael moore keeps doing what he does,

we clearly need him.

finally this blog will be what i want

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chicago taught me everything.

i heard myself talking to people but i was really just talking to myself.

be yourself

forget about everything else

you’re younger than you think

take pictures of everything

you’re not alone

this beer tastes like shit

midwest summertime humidity and hospitality is the most magical healing combo ive experienced and trust me ive been around the block

the city and suburbs were warm and green and people, rich and poor look you in the eye and tell you right what they think

babies too.

people had cubs hats on, way more sox hats than i expected, bears shirts, and smiles.

i spotted more than i expected shirtless men.

and amber seriously fell in love with all of it while all along i kept saying this is all a beautiful illusion, for winter is coming.

when you get older and you return to certain places you say, oh yeah, over there used to be the bank and before that it was dinner theater and before that it was a drug store

this time i was turning the dial on the radio and there was no more The Loop.

one day i’d turn it there and its like love songs or something and i kept it there for longer than i shoulda

like i was waiting for something magical to happen and it would come back.

but it never did.

it never does.)

we are in suburbia, my home, amber loves it

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she wants to move here. it’s quiet. i say what about those planes flying overhead.

she says what planes. i say what about all of these big box stores going out of business.

she says have you seen how cheap houses are?

i say what about all the malls dying. she says i have seen zero homeless people.

she says look there are kids playing in the streets. look theres black kids on bikes.

look theres woods everywhere and green grass and clean streets and fresh air.

no grafitti. the cops wave at you. there are two high schools, one just for the freshmen and sophomores so they wont get beat up by the upper classmen.

look at all the land people have. look at the colors. gas is only how much!

lets move. lets move lets move she says.

i say, this is all an illusion, a siren song, a mirage of the lotus eaters.

for winter is coming, sweet valley girl.

and soon the white walkers who bring with them black ice. wind chill.

and all this green grass and leafy trees and happiness

flees to california

where it’s safe.

she says lets move here.