because nothing in here is true, it’s tough, sometimes, when looking back through this blog to figure out *exactly* what is going on in my life.

so i will tell you that i am in excellent health, knock wood,

i have a lovely girlfriend who lives with me and my two cats, Prince & Michael, here in East Hollywood

i am surrounded by amazing friends, most of whom i have known from college or the various jobs ive had

i am currently unemployed living on savings (always save for a rainy day, Cub fans)

even though i have been super qualified for several jobs ive applied for, for some reason they haven’t made it past the first interview phase.

i have two or three good possibilities out there. it’s gonna happen.  I should just clean my apartment and enjoy this time off but to be honest i am a bit worried, in part, because i couldn’t have been more perfect for some of these gigs.

i have a friend who wrote me the other day to tell me that agism is real and he is feeling it too. but i dont believe thats the case for me. i have an amazing track record. the companies i work for almost always do well when im there. hell even the giants went to the playoffs the year i sold beer there.

i truly believe that Hearts have been Hardened so that i would be available for the Perfect next gig, and this waiting game was so i would appreciate that job even more than i would have normally appreciated it.

anyways posterity, right now there is this thing called Movie Pass that lets you go to the theater every day and see a movie for just $10 a month. most theaters participate in it. so today i saw the Aretha Franklin doc “Amazing Grace” at the NoHo 7.

by 1972, aretha had nearly a dozen huge hits under her belt and even though she was raised by a famous detroit pastor and learned to sing in the church, she hadn’t recorded a gospel album since her debut when she was 14.

she flew to Watts and knocked out Amazing Grace over two nights in what was a small movie theater that had recently been converted to a Baptist church. Sidney Pollock, a decade before he directed “Tootsie” was roaming around with a camera, two of the Rolling Stones were lurking in the back row (and eventually made their way up front) but all eyes were on the 29 year old Lady Soul.

she was backed by three rows of gospel singers, a rhythm section, including a dude on congas, and her dad’s former musical director on piano.

the story on how the film finally got released is epic on its own. apparently Pollock made a rookie mistake by not using the clapper between songs so they could sync the cameras with the audio, so the unedited footage sat and sat in the Warner Bros vaults until this dude mortgaged his house to buy the reels so he could edit them.

once he did, Aretha fought him for 8 years to keep it from being seen.

which is bizarre because when the double record was released in ’72, it was a smash hit. not just Aretha’s biggest album in her career, but the best selling gospel record of all time.

why didn’t she want the movie out there?

all these critics today are falling over themselves about how it’s one of the greatest music docs of all time. but they’re not being honest. it’s historic, no doubt. it’s a fine document of two nights in South Central LA when a legendary artist sang so well that her mentor had to sit down and cry in the middle of the title track.

but it doesn’t tell the story.

we don’t learn why she chose to leave her beloved Detroit to come to the New Temple Missionary Baptist Church for this record. why are the Stones there? where’s Keef? why are there so many empty seats? why does Aretha barely talk? who are these musicians? why these songs?

something tells me the doc about the doc would be way more interesting, but seeing how tough it was to just release this, i doubt The Making Of would come around any time soon.

i love music documentaries more than any other genre. you should have seen the smile on my face when it began. but halfway through i was struggling to stay awake. it was beautiful music but nothing was happening visually. i was bored – which is hard to do with such inspirational music.

i gave it a B but listened to the record all night.

amber and i took a long walk.

shes a good girl.

im lucky.