dear log,

my personal life is at a noine.

and i see some light at the end of the tunnel for my professional life.

ive got two things out there that may come true.

one is the longest shot youve ever seen.

but the good thing is i am dictating exactly what it is, down to every detail, it probably won’t be approved because it’s basically saying

hi im christopher columbus, im gonna sail the ocean blue, with three ships, the pinta and minta and the gloria bell and i know all the maps say im gonna fall off the edge of the world

and there might be dragons

and as the doors said, no one here gets out alive

but i think i know the exact route. and when i get there im gonna plant my flag in Ohio and theyre gonna love me. and imma come back with exotic plants and animals and everythings gonna be different forever. and ever. for all of us. and its gonna cost a ton of cash, but i think i know where to get it.

the other thing is super fun too because it’s almost just like what i have been doing for the last five years, but different in all the right ways.

my odds of getting another interview for that one is high. mostly because i am uniquely qualified. youd think they would have just stopped the search after i applied but my luck isn’t like that. ive gotta work for inch. which i fine. you get stronger that way.

so the other day i was reading wikipedia because thats how bored i have been. and i learned about the tallest stack of pallets in the world (pictured). this guy i guess was super despondent that his little daughter had died. so he got all these wooden pallets and stacked them on her grave(?!) it grew to like 2,000 pallets.

eventually some of them fell down and a few others were cleared out. but then one day he got the wise idea to make it a historical eyesore or something, i mean, a landmark. and the city okayed it.

later one of the commissioners said they must have been drunk that day.

the city?

the city of angels.

former home of the tallest wooden pallet stack in the world.

(when the dude died his kids sold the property for millions and they took away the pallets and built condos.)