ive never had this problem before.
i can pay attention to things for minutes and then on to the next.
i need a staff. i need interns. i need a consiglieri. i need a busboy.
the great singer of the Cure, Robert Smith, went on tour once and reportedly had an assistant that could only ask him questions that he could answer with yes and no.
i need that. but if i was singing, id get bored of a song after a minute. maybe i would have to play the tunes at twice the speed.
im even bored with this post.
while that’s true, it’s even more embarrassing than that.
often the simplest things can get the heart beating: a well turned line of poetry, a full blog post, a dance around a tree,
and sometimes
the lightest sigh.
luckily i was born on the Scorpio cusp which helps me shut the door that the Libra side loves to open.
the Scorpion never forgets a single slight, is suspicious of all comers, and enjoys the taste of blood both literally and figuratively while the Libran only wants
peace love and harmony.
the Scorp want to fuck, fight, and flee
the Libra wants to cuddle, dream, and be.
i am not a Scorpio on the Libra cusp, though i think that would have been easier.
and i would have been a far sharper dresser.
i am a Libra with flashes of that deadly tail.
Last night there was a disturbance at the heron house. a 39 year old woman from Watts was upset that one of our neighbors had placed a note on her Kia Soul warning that if she did not fix her car alarm a brick would find its way through her windshield.
she did the natural thing and started raging at our building. IMMA DRAG WHOEVER WROTE THIS NOTE FROM ONE END OF THE BLOCK TO THE OTHER
she explained that she was not the one to be played with
that she was violent, worked and lived nearby, and if she lost her job over this matter so be it. she yelled so loudly and beautifully i was instantly in love.
i finished my shower, got dressed, and went out into the courtyard where several of my neighbors had gathered to try to reason with her.
they were met with threats and strange questions from her like HOW OLD ARE YOU? and
WHY DONT YOU GET YOUR SKINNY ASS DOWN HERE AND I’LL SHOW YOU WHATS UP
the angels have blessed my mind with the greatest comebacks and i delivered a few but i felt bad. this woman loved her new used car sans license plate. she was traumatized with the crime on her block which is why she parked on ours.
the xbi has ensured that i am safe for some reason.
but some of her threats were just funny. and when she took a breath an while the other ladies in my courtyard paused, i asked her if i could ask a question.
she said yes. because i am so handsome. in my long robe. at night.
i asked, can i have your text message number so i can call you if the alarm goes off again that way you can turn it off and no one has to leave notes.
later one of my neighbors called me a peacemaker which if you recall that was my new years resolution.
eventually the police came. so much excitement for our little block. we all talked for hours. videos had been made. police reports. edibles were exchanged.
the outraged woman brought many of us together, which is quite a feat since we had been locked up in our apartments for a year, alone. sad. borderline miserable.
we exchanged laughs afterwards in the group text chat.
and this morning her car was gone.
RIP
but things blowing up is a rare thing, next week i have this thing about coke that i bet you will do well in fact if i was smart id work on it all day today
but i am a dumb stupid foolish person.
anyways i saw something on twitter and noticed it was only 4 minutes old so i put it up on reddit and ba-zoom, nearly 1,000 upvotes and 5 people gave me things, one of them was Reddit Gold.
as you see, i rarely post things on reddit and the last two times i did it only got 20 and 29 upvotes.
reddit will quickly tell you if you’re out of touch.
and then boom Da Bearsssssss.
granted, it was sad and angry and i would not like to excel in those emotions, but it was nice to see when i least expected it.
when i wake up im interviewing one of howard stern’s long time interns
lets see how that goes
that’s because some of the kids are celebrating how they got in to america’s newest most popular college
or they’re super depressed they werent accepted
im exhausted.
i woke up early to post my thing on Shane Nickerson, the Ridiculousness producer.
after i did i got some really great advice about Medium and a bunch of people want to write for my new medium publication, Del Playa
then i went to Hollywood Blvd to photograph this dude im writing another piece on.
and then i got a Popeye’s sandwich and the manager there remembered me from when i interviewed her for Los Angeleno. she said that theres a TikTok video of she and i making the rounds of when i was talking with her.
i couldnt find it. i will try again tomorrow.
im pooped.
so out of energy.
do i really need to eat vegetables instead of fried chicken?
by this young lady.
it was such a nice thing that she said that i honestly don’t believe it.
which is odd because if she had said something terrible i wouldn’t doubt it in the slightest.
there should be a study on brains. why do we have such a hard time when people say nice things or do very nice things.
but when things are crappy or people are awful, that stays with us longer?
i can’t help but think that it’s because the Devil lives in our inner ear, constantly saying terrible things to us, endlessly trying to break us down, kill our spirit, ruin our days.
i dont know how often you read this blog, but one reason i list my blessings so often in here is because im trying to fight the devil. and in doing so i am trying to remind myself that a) i have had a blessed life b) that i have known some incredible people c) lived in amazing towns d) things will be better just around the corner.
in part because i know the Great Deceiver is beating the drum that it’s over for me. my luck has run out. that im old and bald and fat and ive lost a step. that my magic no longer works. and ANYTHING i did of any value in the past was pure luck that had nothing to do with me.
i look at this picture of Linda in my apartment in SF on folsom street and 24th and its like it was all yesterday. look at that honking computer monitor, giant speakers in the corner, cds perfectly arranged in my book shelf.
today talking to her on the phone i did laundry, cleaned up a closet, and we yapped about police business until my phone died. she used to be a cop.
i do have the greatest friends. they seem to still love me for some reason. Lord only knows why. but i am super grateful.
then i guess im boring.
i cannot concentrate on anything.
i asked the doc what should i do she said you gotta wait 3-4 months to get adderall. i said i dont have that long. ive gotta make some major moves quick or else i will end up working for some soulless company doing the same old stuff and then poof my life will be over.
i dont wanna live in a soviet apartment.
i dont wanna have an ordinary life.
when i die i want people to say holy shit i didnt know tony pierce is buried here and when their friend asks who’s tony pierce they’ll say
spark up that joint and i’ll tell you.
i feel like im at a crossroads but its also a cliff
and ive gotta jump.
and i could crack my head open on the coral below
or i could stick it perfectly and swim into another land.
april 1 2001 i moved into this apartment which means in two weeks i will have lived here 20 years.
i have done some very fun things in this apartment.
i have had some huge breakthroughs and some deep deep disappointments.
but for the most part way more good things have happened than bad and this year will either be a truly new leaf
or more of the same.
i want a new leaf.
it’s hard to say good bye to the comfortable and familiar.
but it’s time to turn the page.
and maybe that’s why im all blocked up right now.
usually pizza makes my stomach knot up. but today i ate a pepto bismol before i went to get the pie and all went well.
then after i ate half of it i warmed up some peas and ate those too.
these 20 years have flown by at breakneck speeds.
please get high if you ever come by my gravestone.
and heres why its ok.
after kpcc i just could not get a gig to save my life. if it wasnt for my friend amy i dont even know what i would have done.
she got me some freelance work that paid really good. it was hard but it paid.
then someone from the LA Times told me about the Oscars job and — do you know how much i love the Oscars? suddenly im working there. going to it. socialmediaing it? improving the numbers. talking to the people. learning the things?
if i had just gotten the ok job right outta kpcc, i would have never gotten the incredible job months and months later.
was i in a terrible funk in between those two? yes. terrrrible. i even went into fox news’ hq in nyc and interviewed for a job. i was maybe gonna move. while there the oscars called and said whats up. i was all im in nyc because obvs my life is over.
and they were all well get back here because out of 1000 applicants you’re tony pierce.
so whats crazy about todays denial, they know me. they reached out to me. then they made me jump through a hoop on the other side of the moon. and i jumped and flew around and stuck the landing.
and still no. which is totally fine because sometimes it’s nice to have to jump high and show what youre made of. and do things in a few weeks that whoever they chose couldnt do in years.
if anything to just see yourself that you can do it. and be funny. and be fresh. and be right on the money.
im gonna do my own thing going forward.
i dont ever want to be in a situation where one or two people determine my future.
the first half of my life was that and it was interesting but fuck that shit.
the things i have done have value and the things i know i can do have even more.
why am i splitting it with them with me getting the tiniest fraction?
the season of lent is not about giving up things but having a different relationship to the things we do through the rest of the year.
im gonna write my ass off on medium
then podcast my ass off like the freak i am.
here the distinguished gentleman from Mississippi has received over 28,000 comments compared to 4,600 likes. why?
Sen Wicker is a Republican. Zero Republicans voted for the bill that he is touting in this tweet.
So the people in the comments are saying very mean things to him.
very mean.
This is why it’s good that God made me a blogger and not the bouncer at the Pearly Gates. If I held the velvet rope and this guy showed up and said ‘hi, I invented cassettes,’ I wouldn’t even examine his heart or history.
mark bolan is trex.
i met t-rex’s son, roland.
roland bolan was very nice.
didnt need to be,
coulda just said, touch me i am here because of trex.
instead he said, hi my name is roland, ready to watch Tsar?
trex had a song called calling all destroyers.
tsar had a song called calling all destroyers
and james gunn put it at the beginning of his movie Super
a couple years after james did Super he did a little movie called
Guardians of the Galaxy
then Guardians of the Galaxy 2
and in august his new movie will come out called The Suicide Squad
today i was signing up to see a therapist because i have insurance now
actual conversation:
have you been feeling lately anxious or worried?
we’re in the tail end of the plague.
correct. do you sleep well?
yes, i go to sleep around 5 and wake up around 10 or 11. today it was 9.
you don’t smoke medical marijuana do you?
im gonna stop.
why?
it used to help me go to sleep.
doesn’t seem to be working?
thats why im calling you.
the hospital called at the end of an interview i was conducting with the man in charge of the police in hollywood.
now typically i am not an anxious man.
id say it was because i played sports and in the band as a child and when you have to perform in front of crowds, and especially if youre the only one with a giant afro
pressure aint no thing by the time you grow up
but i was a bit nervous about this interview
because i was about to ask him about some bad things about his men and women.
and we only had a half hour scheduled.
for some reason i do better with an hour.
but we hit it off right away because we are both professionals.
i treated him respectfully and he didn’t give me a bunch of hype.
it was actually refreshing how little bullshit he gave me.
i am trying to talk with a giant food brand right now and the load of crap they have shoveled my way is shocking because — im not even asking them anything controversial.
with this captain i was talking about illegalities, deaths, social media. serious business.
and then i had to talk to this therapist assistant.
i said i am having a hard time concentrating. i first thought it was because my gf and i were fighting a lot because we were both unemployed and she had to be in a small apartment with me all day and im great in small doses. but 24.7? even the cats are like, no its cool.
i think she said we will give you so much adderall.
i was like, when?
she was all, it takes 4 months just to get tested to see if its right for you.
i was all ???
she was like i know, everyone in LA thinks they’re losing their minds right now, so theres a line.
and ive never felt more kinship to this beautiful city.