i dont know why i didnt think i was smart enough to learn

actually i do

in school i was given mixed messages.

they said i “tested well” but then they’d give me crappy grades.

but when i did well, they put me in a special room or on the back of the class

with the smart kids

which to me was just as terrible as being in a place deemed Dumb Kids

i wanted to be with everyone.

id dabbled with this piece of software and that one now and then and i just couldnt work it

but for some reason, and i know im cheating because im doing wacky things with screen shots

and iphones and Instagram Stories and air drop and

not entirely Davinci Resolve

but today i made that video, and i did the Grammy Award transition so i wouldnt get dinged by the Grammys

and then i did the Rihanna bang at the end

plus i took that picture at the beginning and the end of Jeffs book shelf

and then tonight

because jordan was on a jet plane

i did some audio editing

i didnt like a sentence i said and a few words in another place

id been playing around with the In n Outs but it didnt really come together until i did it

just

in the audio track and voila

which is french for tony,

the apes have learned how to use weapons.

this couldnt have come at a better time.

speaking of time, that video up there took me 20 minutes.

the one a few days ago took me 6 hours.

also im back using my magic office room

which Emmanuelle called “le makeout closet”

for years it was amber’s man cave and can you believe it took me 8 months to claim it back,

WHAT WOULD THE SHRINK SAY ABOUT THAT?

i feel so incredibly good that i am learning things

i feel so grateful that i have the tools that i need

and youtube

and a little time.