end of the year not so blues

i worked all night. why because im a procrastinator.

what i did was good.

how i feel is bad.

what will motivate me next year?

love? success? fear? hope?

i wanna be better. i wanna do cooler things.

i wanna show the haters… actually i dont care about them.

i only care about the Lord and my ma.

fuck the haters.

interviewed these kids who go to Glendale High.

i asked them who their mascot was.

they said they are the Dynomites or the Dynos

I was all, what the hell is that.

they said this guy dresses up like a stick of dynomite.

i was all, get outta town

they were all, no seriously.

got home, Googled it

and thats the greatest thing ive ever seen.

have i told you that im going to go to every neighborhood in LA and talk to all the people and learn stuff?

look at me learning shit.

ran into two young men outside of Target last night

they said

we’re college students doing a survey about religion, are you a reader of the Bible?

yes, yes i am.

we want to ask you about the Holy Mother. You are aware of the Holy Father, God, and we are His children. If you have the Father and the children, we are here to ask you, “what’s missing”?

i said, absolutely nothing.

they were all, ????

i said, when i was a student, like you two, i asked my mother for an unabridged dictionary. this was in the days before the Internet. dark days when one needed books, volumes of reference materials like thesauruses and dictionaries.

i said, ma, can you get me an unabridged dictionary, one that has at least 300,000 words?

and when the book came in the mail it was not unabridged. it was fully bridged my brothers.

and with it came this note.

she wrote, i love you, son with all of my heart, here are 65,000 words, when you have mastered those, let me know and i will get you a book with 65,000 more. xoxoxox your mom.

and it taught me a valuable lesson, my fellow seekers of Truth, she taught me that often when we think we need more more more we actually need to learn about what it is we have.

i do not think we have mastered our relationship with God, The Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit.

perhaps there is a Holy Mother. perhaps there is a Holy step sister and a Holy Uncle.

but i think the reason that it’s only the Father that the Good Book is focused on, is because that’s more than enough for humans to chew on right now.

don’t forget, when it was just Adam, Eve, God, the snake and the tree, Adam ate from the tree even though he watched God turn his rib into a woman right before his eyes.

until we have mastered our relationship with God and our fellow man, we need not be distracted by other things.

now go tell that to your teacher.