i have 15 mins before my friends take me to 11th street

so here’s my Ask Tony’s answers which will be dedicated to lisa b, jordan, trent from pink is the new blog (omg!), and karisa

Rob W asks: When do we get to see you in DC? Sorry I missed you last time, but I had to be out of town. This time, I will be here.

the last time i was in my birthplace was rocktober of 2006. i arrived, waved at the white house, ate chinese food in the hood, hung with my brother, then got outta dodge. i hadnt been there in a long time and all the monuments, museums, and government buildings looked extremely surreal, especially after driving across the country.

K asks: time before plane ticket gets to canada to bring willing sidekick?

honestly wicked jealous, last semester of undergrad… maybe next year i’ll make it!

i have no idea what your question was. in regards to plane tickets, i dont even send them to gorgeous exotic dancers. im a blogger, all you can expect from me is blog posts. and usually even those will be unpredictable, when theyre good.

creepy dude axes: At Mardi Gras this year, I was drinking at a bar in a pretty classy hotel. This superhot chick chats me up and eventually invites me up to her room. The kissing and groping was going great, when she said if I’d let her tie me to the bed, she’d give me a big surprise. So after I’m strapped in, she goes “here’s your surprise” and a guy dressed in a Batman costume jumps out the closet and [edited because i like my job and would like to keep it – the mgmt]. It was gross, but I’ve had worse. Still, I want to find the guy and beat his ass.

Last week, I spotted the girl in a strip club. I confronted her, but she says the guy offered her $1500 and an 8-ball, and since he had the Batman suit on the whole time, she can’t identify him. She offered to have with sex me (no ropes) if I didn’t report her to the cops.

Although I feel victimized, the girl really is superhot. I thought about doing her, and then reporting her anyway, but that seems a little dickified. I’ll take your objective advice as to what to do since my emotions are too conflicted to think rationally.

Thanks, man. I love riding the Busblog.

any time strippers with money, drugs, and costumed men are involved, im glad that i lead a very simple boring life which i then lie about on my blog. so my advice to you is enter into a long term relationship with said woman and write every detail down.

Zona ponders: you went to school with Spicoli? and is that the other Wham dude too?

i went to school with many Spicoli’s. sean penn is from malibu which is about 50 minutes south of ucsb. as for Wham!, my bro Chris has nothing on Andrew Rigley and i suck for knowing that dudes name without even having to wikipedia it.

Dan wonders: If there was a single concert/show (any time/venue/artist) that you could go back in time and see, which would it be?

when i first moved to LA Prince played like 5 nights at the Forum. they had lights around it that were all purple. so either one of those shows or the time when Metalica opened for Ozzy in ’85 at the Long Beach arena and the kids rioted during the metalica encore and they had to cancel Ozzy’s part of the show. theres something about riots at metal shows that appeals to me in a very deep way. so yes, elvis in vegas would be my answer.

bloopy queries: the other day i went to chipotle ‘cuz on several occasions you’ve mentioned how much you dug their grub, and i couldn’t help but think how it would’ve been good had i been in europe, but for s.f. it really kind of sucked. . .

i figure l.a. must have taquerias that are comparable to the ones in the mission district so what gives?. . . do you really prefer chipotle to your local mom & pop taqueria joints?. . . or do you think of chipotle as its own type of food (like i do with, say, taco bell)?. . .

there are no taquerias anywhere in the world that compare to El Faro Lito or El Burro or any of those other ones in the mission.

i like one thing at chipotle: their spicy beef burrito. i like it because its like a good fisting, but in your gut. you have to be ready for it. you cant eat one before you go shopping at the beverly center. you have to have a mens room nearby. you cant be on a date. you cant have plans. its an entire experience. sorry, i probably should have stated that when i said how much i like chipotle.

but yes i like taco bell, i like jack n the box tacos, AND i like my local mom and pop taco joints. all for very very different reasons, and for different tastes.

.Ophelia. flatters: are you working on a novel, any creative works in the near future?

I love this picture of you. Have a great weekend!

i work all day and all night at my dream job. i dont even really have “time” for the busblog. i have tried writing novels but they always end up into twisted sex fantasies which are so boring. my real life is way better and hotter. and involves creativity. trying to get down the pants of a sober girl from romania who doesnt know much english and who isnt even that good of a kisser involves way more creativity than writing a novel about two hillbillies whitewashing fences, if you ask me.

its 421am

rihanna im in vegas. listening to gogol bordello on the plasma screen. karisa is snoozing away in her room. my room is calling my name. last night we attended the mtv video awards and it blew our minds.

like many of you, i grew up on mtv. but unlike most of you, i remember life pre-MTV so when our town finally got it, we were glued to the set – even when the videos were as lame as chris debarge, men at work, and krokus.

but through all of these years mtv has been a mainstay on my television dial. not only did they turn me on to a lot of music that i ended up love, ive also watched almost every reality series that theyve run. definately every episode of The Real World, Ozzy, Remote Control, my super sweet 16, “I’m a …” and oh so many more.

so to actually Be at the vmas, and get invited to interview people on the red carpet, and hang out in the free bar – i mean Press Room – and get to talk to Common whose song “The People” i play almost every day – was so surreal.

i met so many stars. i saw so many of the biggest people. i got to interview so many artists who i’d seen so many times – from Scary Spice to Steve O to Ron Jeremy – and to be there with one of my best friends, in my third favorite city, and get paid for it. well, if you were ever gonna hate, this would be the time to unload cuz ive had a dream weekend.

speaking of karisa, mtv gave me 1 pass to one of the fantasy suites that they had. in each room there was a band playing. in one room you had fall out boy, in another foo fighters, in one was Kanye, and in another was justin timberlake. mtv said you can get a pass for one room and party there for the length of the awards show and the artist will perform a mini concert. but you can only pick one suite to go in, and you have to stay there.

so i picked JT for our girl but because Justin was winning awards and having to perform on main stage downstairs at the Pearl, he had 50 cent do a concert in his suite, and then TI, and then Justin came up and did his thing. so yeah, 3 concerts basically. although the suites are big, theyre still just a hotel suite, so karisa was just feet away from the fellas.

she also told me that when Justin was trying to get on stage, someone pushed her into the former boybander and her hand sorta ended up on JT’s backside. which means that if you hooked her up to a lie detector and asked karisa if she had ever tapped Justin Timberlake’s ass, she could say yes, honestly.

after the awards we tried to accept Diddys invite to meet him on the 32nd floor of the Palms but were shunned by security at the door of the suite. but we got to ride in the elevator with Megan Fox who was the only chick in the house, other than rihanna, who gave karisa a run for her money.

afterwards we ate crab cakes and fried cheese at the Peppermill and one guy seriously spilled his drink when karisa crossed her legs in her short black dress.

and in 7 hours we have to leave this excellent hotel and this fine city and go back home. and ive been here in vegas many times, but this was probably the most fun ive ever had here. booze flowed like it was liquid! the food was amazing. and the company was ideal.

and in a strange bit of good luck we ended up in a stretch limo that took us to the awards for a ridiculously low rate. particularly since so many limos had rolled into that hotel at ridiculously high rates.

once again, the Lord showing that he has my back.

on the way here to vegas, karisa suggested that we make it an Honesty Weekend. since we’re good friends, and since what happens in vegas stays here, we could be brutally honest about everything regarding life, our friendship, and rock music and we had to accept the feedback or answer the tough questions. and i gotta tell you it was a great excersize cuz i learned things about her that i never knew, and she told me things that i would have never guessed.

if you do have a close friend who you trust, i highly recommend it. you might be pleasantly surprised by their feedback.

I got this off Binsk’s blog

weezerPut your music player on shuffle. Press forward for each question. Use the song title as the answer to the question. Post on your blog.

Will I get far in life?
In the Summertime – Mungo Jerry

How do my friends see me?
Runaway – Me First and the Gimme Gimmes

Where will I get married?
Freak Me Out – Weezer

What is my best friend’s theme song?
Crazy For You – Madonna (which i think is true)

What is the story of my life?
Down Home Girl – Rolling Stones

What was high school like?
Merry Go Round – Victoria Williams

How can I get ahead in life?
Pumpin Gas – Shawn White Band

What is the best thing about me?
Raw Power – Guns N Roses

How is today going to be?
Devil’s Daughter – Ozzy

What is in store for this weekend?
Go Down – AC/DC

What song describes my parents?
Good and Bad Food – Mitch Hedberg

My grandparents?
Truck Drivin Man – J. Geils Band

How is my life going?
18 & Life – Nina Gordon

What song will they play at my funeral?
Bandwagon – R.E.M.

How does the world see me?
Eyes Without a Face – Paul Anka

Will I have a happy life?
So Broken – Bjork

What do my friends really think of me?
One Of These Days, Neil Young

Do people secretly lust after me?
(I Cant Get No) Satisfaction – Devo

How can I make myself happy?
Under the Influence – Matthew Good Band

What should I do with my life?
Bad Boys Running Wild – Scorpions

Will I ever have children?
Bells Ring – Mazzy Star

What is some good advice?
Been A Son – Nirvana

What is my signature dancing song?
Mishto! – Gogol Bordello

What do I think my current theme song is?
Angel – Aerosmith

What does everyone else think my current theme song is?
Ask About Me – Ice Cube

What type of men/women do you like?
Goin Out West – Tom Waits

What did you think of this meme?
What Now? Dag Nasty

binsk + welch has new corvids samples + hewhocannotbenamed