paris hilton was over last night.


good news and bad news about having paris hilton over to the house. good news is shes hot and she puts out. every time. bad news is she, as you now know from the video, is attached to her phone and it rings constantly.

as you can imagine when you start hanging out with someone like her, you dont really put your entire heart into it because you never know when its going to be over. but i try. she probably cant tell but i do try. my time isnt as valuable as hers, but it is mine, and sometimes im willing to share it with people. rarely. super rarely.

she reads the busblog and is always trying to figure out which parts are real and which arent and whos who and all that but she knows how much i leave out and a lot of times she thinks that i leave out all the real sex that im having and i tell her that im pretty much only having real sex with her and she went over to the floor of my bed and saw the used condom wrappers and said so all of these are just from us and i examined the evidence and said yep.

not sure if she believed me.

anyway, one way you can tell that i like you, and the only reason by the way that i think shes with me is cuz she thinks im the only person who actually really likes her for the right reasons and simultaneously doesnt like her for the right reasons, is if i show you whats on my tivo and whats in my record collection.

last night i was supposed to do laundry with her but instead we started drinking some of that trader joes three dollar wine and i started playing randy newman cds for her and showing her the great beginnings of movies and we watched and everything was going good. might have even been some cozy cuddling happening there.

then the phone rang.

omg the phone!

she sprang up and answered it.

the first time didnt bother me so much because i know about her friendship with nicole richie, but when it kept happening as we were watching the finale of average joe it sorta became tiresome to me. eventually she asked me if i was going to spend the night at her house and i said maybe.

then nicole called again around 9:30p and paris said, wait, bubba isnt there? he hasnt been there all night? ok, i’ll be there at 10, er, 10:30.

at this point i had retreated to the computer closet. body language is everything. there i was totally opening up to her, forgetting my responsibilites about laundry, the blog, the site, the xbi and instead of telling her friends tara and nicole to chill for a lil she kept picking up the damn phone and it was a total wet blanket.

so i wrote.

hot as that girl is, i dont really like the fact that her timetable is determined by her friends.

theres a reason the term cockblocker was coined.

but some people allow it to happen and they dont know sometimes that the guy is reaching out, it might not be reaching out in the way that they might be used to but it is. and it sucks when the good thing is fucked with.

and last night i was gonna ask paris to the xbi christmas dance cuz she has been good, but the phone rang again and i said forget it.

and id ask my true love but she’ll probably say no cuz shes smart and secretly im superlame.

operation gustation + resident jason + jeff mcmanus

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