i feel great

not sure why

actually yes i do

it’s because i was on tv yesterday

and because a pretty girl wrote me an email

and because im going to stop the world famous busblog very soon

and start a new one on substack

and imma buy a new car

even though theres no way i can afford one

at all

like, at all

but sometimes you have to push yourself

and im happy bc every now and then i realize ive kept myself alive through writing

which is a precarious job because you rely on other people to say ok yes youre good enough to be paid for what you type

not an easy feat

it’s a privilege actually.

especially these days when AI is geting better and better

so you have to figure out what makes you better

and you have to hope that people care that youre better

because if they dont, if they just want fodder, then they’ll go for the robot

so maybe i need to figure out a way to make fun of the robots

while using AI

anyways im happy today probably because my mom called me

after i was on tv

and she said she was happy with me

only compliment that matters in the world

cubs won the weekend series against the dodgers

 

and woulda swept them if the ump yesterday wasn’t shrooming.

in other news i heard excellent news about a good man who had a bad ticker.

turned out he got a new heart and a transplant in the nick of time.

one of the best people ive met. very happy for him and his family. God is good.

life is so fleeting. you never know whats going to just fuck up in our body and thats it.

which is why i send out so many dick pics.

jk.

walked past a sticker today that said “roger was here.”

and it made me sad bc roger is the name of Amber’s dad.

and i thought, if i was really a great ex bf id make Amber was here stickers

and put them around all the places she and i visited.

since she

was

there at one point of her too-short life.

i get sad about her more than i thought i would.

my heart is dark, but i guess its still working.

i pity the person who gets any of my parts when i croak.

spent the day working soooo long on this next podcast

there was a time jordan did the editing of the audio, now i do it

i see why he wanted my interviews to be 45 minutes

this one was 3 hours.

it’s taken me forever to edit it down bc im so easily distracted

i’ll get on a little run and i’ll be so happy that i’ll do something else “real quick” like make a pic like the one above.

is it ADD or ADHD or procrastination?

i really wanted to do 3 episodes this month but i dont think it’ll happen.

now that i have my uber stories and setlist and actually driving uber im so busy and things that take a long time like the podcast get pushed to the back

not sure how i can fix that other than do something wild and limit my twitter to 1 hour a day instead of 23.

the other night i was soooo tired and soooo on empty and i hadnt eaten much and i hadnt dranken enough water and i was sooo sleepy but i still had more and more to do so after i took a leak i felt like i might not make it to the bed

so once i got in the hallway i took a step and flew into the bed

once i got there i was sweaty

i wanted to cry from exhaustion

and i sat there and laughed

toweled off

and got back to working.

got my taxes done

it cost me a lot: $700

and i still have to pay $1,200

but seeing as though none of the jobs i did last year withdrew any monies, i did have lots of expenses, so i guess only paying that little is fine.

bad news, i may lose my medical any time soon and may need to start buying health insurance bc i may have made too much last year which is crazy bc im so poor im not even sure i want to get renters insurance bc what do i even have?

a tv? two cats who poop in the morning bc i am not playing with them enough?

old clothes ppl might think were stolen from the homeless?

there is some apple juice in the fridge

and ding dongs in the sock drawer.

it may not seem like it but i am struggling with this adhd

things take me even longer than before to finish.

i cannot do anything. im in quicksand. the doc doubled my dosage. maybe 2.5x more and all it does is make me write things like THIS. things i shouldnt be doing.

although i do feel bad that the glorious busblog the thing that launched it all has been not attended to properly.

i always thought when i was a kid because i read it in the bible, that id have multiple wives.

in a way i do, weirdly.

this thing
the Howard Stern facebook group of 22k members
hear in LA
the new Uber stories substack called Ride Overshare
setlist.fm (the only thing on this list that keeps the lights on)
Rock Illustrated
In Lub With the Cubs
and I am the commish of two fantasy baseball leagues

none of that is overwhelming

i missed a lot of days of blogging on this thing last month

whats overwhelming is i also want to drive every night, record every night, sleep more than 4 hours, and be able to pay attention to a task for more than 3 minutes.

somehow im able to do it, but is it any good? people say the sweetest things especially about the new thing, the uber stories.

and now pretty girls are writing be again, so maybe?

i wonder how many regrets like this i will have this year

because of numerous reasons i didnt go see U2 with my brother in Vegas for any of the Sphere shows

people are calling it the greatest show ever

i wanted to go. i should have gone. i should have done whatever it took.

i thought this would happen or that or this other thing and none of them came through.

still i shoulda done the thing.

now i regret it because now it feels like that moment is gone and wont come back.

on the other hand u2 reportedly made $4 million a show with minimal overhead.

so maybe u2 will return to that gravy train again one day. which would be beautiful.

until then i will learn from this mistake and live for the day instead of waiting for miracles to happen tomorrow.