and you havent eaten lunch yet?

ever go upstairs for a weekly meeting and theres a film crew shooting a new Deniro flick and it looks like Bobby D is going to be using your old office back when you had an office?

ever get chewed out by the sexiest girl who dumps you tells you your selfish tells you she never wants to see you again tells you you kissed bad tells you you held hands bad tells you that youre the opposite of compatible and then a month later in the middle of the night informs you that she just noticed that you “defriend”ed her on facebook and wants to know why youd do something that mean?

ever go back and forth on something in your mind like 100 times in a day “yes i will go to SXSW, no i wont go to SXSW, yes i will, no i wont, they need me here, they need me there, its too expensive, its pricelss, the bands, the contacts, the booze, the food, the opportunites, the insight, the travel, the late nights, the early morns, the expense, the waste, the couch you could buy, the bed you could buy”

ever try to be good at 3pm and head down to the cafeteria for a chicken salad and theres no chicken and you have to eat a completely vegetarian salad. dont these people know youre lightskinned but very much a black man in Black History Month, thus chicken is not an option its a necessity?

ever go to bed at 4:20am and you have no idea why it took you so long to get there?

ever wonder how hard howard stern is laughing now that he knows that his old radio station in LA has gone from #1 when he was on in the mornings to forced to change their format to music because the hole he left was so grande that Adam Corolla, Tom Lyekis, or Frosty Heidi and Frank couldnt fill it?

ever wonder how you can get a gig blogging about Vegas for the LA Times and your current assignment is being “embedded” inside the worlds most popular whore house?

ever wonder when they will make a battery that could get recharged by the sun?

ever wonder how long it would take the USA’s first black attorney general to call the land of the free “a nation of cowards” in regards to race relations?

ever wonder how much i heart you?