had fun last night.

had fun this morning. probably wont have fun today. but i will have fun tonight.

anna kournikova called me last night. i was watching no doubt on the billboard awards at the time.

she wasnt happy with what i wrote about her the other day.

she wanted to let me know that our private conversations are not fodder for the blog, the internet, or anything.

i told her to complain to her husband.

she told me that he wasnt her husband any more and that maybe they never got married in the first place.

i told her i wasnt interested in her gemini behavior.

she said what gemini behavior.

i said all this dating this guy dating that guy marrying this russian hockey player- sorta, marrying that latin boybander – sorta.

she said, enrique was never in a boyband.

i was all, wasnt he in menudo.

she said, no!

i said, i coulda sworn he was.

she was all, quit mixing him up with ricky martin.

i was all, my tivo is waiting.

she was all, sometimes youre the biggest dick.

i was all, thats not necessarilly a bad thing.

she was like fuck you tony pierce

i was like again anna what you are saying sounds like an invitation. it sounds like youre begging for it, and not a put down.

then she yelled, maybe i am begging for it but youre being such an asshole.

then i said ok thats an irrefutable putdown, but i dont get it on with married chicks.

then she said some mean things in russian.

i said, do not put those old school iron curtain curses on me.

and then she started sobbing.

im such a sucker for crying girls. ashley used to get me all the time with that.

but she taught me that when girls start crying to just hang up.

which i did.

and it sounded like this.


hi, craigslist chicago + hi vodkapundit + hi, baldilocks

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