however i must share with you this email she sent me the other day. my sister’s au pere (yes you can afford one of those if you live in The Windy) is coming to LA this weekend with her brother. they are staying at my bachelor pad while i am in austin covering SXSW.
this makes my mom nervous as she knows im not the most tidy fellow. thus i received this email:
Hi Tony. First of all, I apologize for wanting to see Castle last night and having to end our conversation early. It was really good. The critics will probably pan it but I liked it a lot. It’s a little bit like the Mentalist and Shark.
Also, your review was VERY nice. It’s about time you got a boss who appreciates you. I will talk more about it the next time I speak to you.
Just a reminder concerning Roby’s visit. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE have your cleaning lady come the day you leave or the day before. You should have a clean kitchen, no dishes in the sink. Throw all of the trash outside. Clean (or new) linen on the bed, or no sheets on the bed and clean linen folded up on the bottom of the bed. I think her brother is staying with her. So please have 2 sets of clean (or new) towels, wash cloths for them. Wash the bath mat or buy a new one. If you have an extra sheet for the sofa put them out in case he stays there.
Throw all of the clutter in the closet. No used condoms in the trash or anywhere.
Ask one of your Neat girlfriends to come over and help make suggestions.
Roby is very neat so make it neat for her. It is very nice you are allowing her to stay there. She just told me that they may not be going to San Diego so she will not get a chance to meet Jeanine and Chris.
Have a little food in the house too. Bread, eggs, cereal, bottled water, candy. Roby likes English muffins, strawberry preserves, tea and chocolate. She eats pancakes and waffles also.
Please confirm you received this email.
Love ya.
Mom
I guess it doesn’t matter how old you get, your mom sees you as a kid (which is sweet). Thus the cleaning lady is at my house right now with my army of neat girlfriends to rid my home of used condoms and fill my cupboards with preserves and tea.
i gotta say its one of the few laws i break regularly and im glad to see that this meter maid and the lady next to her MUST be on the phone while in traffic.
i guess i dont HAVE to be on the phone when im driving home at night, but i really dont like being on the phone when im home unless its with my mom or my truest or karisa so its nice to get phone stuff handled before i throw on my running gear.
last night i obeyed the recommendation of mr geoff boucher who suggested that i buy the new metallica album Death Magnetic and see how that does on my run. it did me quite well. gotta say im pleasantly surprised by how truly rockin it is.
drew’s is mighty nice but its still weird to look at.
the other day i was in the bathroom at a restaurant. there was a guy at the urinal and even though the kiddie urinal was open next to him, i noticed that the stall was open and im pretty sure the rule is you should use the stall even if all you have to do is a number one.
while in there i saw two bits of graffiti.
the first one said “i hope obama fails”
the other, under it, said, “i hope jimmy fallon fails.”
back in the day people used to work up there, and a few still do, but nowadays most of the floor is used for filming movies, tv shows, and commercials because every office and meeting room is so different. also the views of the Civic Center are classic.
Cisco has an ad campaign out now that was filmed entirely in our building. most of which is done on the 6th floor, although the dude sitting in front of the desk with the green art deco around him and lights around him was shot next to the elevators of the Globe Lobby (as seen here).
its nice outside but i was feeling a little sniffly at the end of work last night and the last thing i wanna do is get a cold right before i go to sxsw. so i tolder id see her on monday or tuesday but right now i needed to laze about and eat trail mix and watch the cubs / brewers on directv from arizona.
i have this new technique ive been using with her. the more she shouts the quieter i’ll whisper. it makes her yell WHAT even louder.
as she was hollering i heard some really good cussing between the home plate ump and someone in the brewers dugout.
“i guess you called that a strike, blue, because you dont give a {blank}” the brewer yelled at the ump.
“oh we give a {blank}” the ump said whipping off his mask and stomping in the direction of the voice.
it was a bad call, but who cares, we got to hear these guys get all pissed off during an exhibition game in the desert.
no offense but when i am watching spring training games i dont need the players being all aggro on a check swing strike. it makes me think that theyre experiencing roid rage or they have money on the game. two things they probably dont want baseball fans to have floating through our heads.
i hung up on the cheerleader and twittered my feelings.
about an hour and a half later theyre scanning through the crowd and theres a couple in the outfield “stands” (its really a mound of grass behind the outfield wall). they kiss. they kiss again. the dude looks down into his girlfriend’s plentiful bosom, licks his fingers a few times, and digs down into her shirt!
what exactly was he up to? did he spot some hot dog bun crumbs down there?
did he spy a stray m&m?
had he dropped a contact lens?
unfortunately the director cut to a far less interesting fan before any of these questions could be answered completely.
now shes off to deliver a little baby boy. shes an incredible leader and will be a great mom. today we had some delicious ice cream cake to celebrate the upcoming delivery, and since her favorite part of the busblog is Ask Tony, here are this weeks answers
Basart: Why is Leonard Cohen fourth on Friday’s Coachella lineup list, while The Killers are first on Saturday’s?
im not sure when the last time you went to coachella, ken, but i was there last year and the year before and i saw lots of tshirts on kids. wanna guess how many said Leonard Cohen? not as many as said Free Leonard Peltier. anyways when the top of the bill also includes a beatle and a smith, theres not a lot of room for old dudes named Lenny. Lemmy maybe, but… The Killers are first on Saturday’s list because if you want the ladies to come out to the desert youve gotta give em something to look at. also i hear there will be a suprise saturday headliner announced sometime soon.
bloopy: so when’s tsar’s next album coming out?. . . and as long as i’m asking about cd releases, what about rocket?. . .
tsar will not have another album. something about the economy. their side project, however, is another story. funny you should mention Rocket. i talked with lauren rocket on facebook this week and she told me they replaced the hot dark haired guitarist with a new dark haired hot guitarist. they also switched out drummmers as they seem to do about every 16 months. its a union thing.
Don: starting qb for the my Vikings, Sage or TJ? and how about my Boston Bruins, is this their year, (he asked with fingers crossed)??
neither. im hearing michael vick. bruins will win it all, so uncross your fingers.
i love kanyes music and murakami is cool and all, but until bro can get away with even a fraction of the shenanigans that my boy andy pulled, including producing a Velvet Underground record, then he can talk. until then its Andy foreverz.
porknbeanz55: what were people’s reactions to the L.A. Times axing the California section?
most of the reaction i heard and read from people who cherish local news here in LA loved it because there was local news on page one, page two, page three, page four… as someone who grew up in Chicago, i was initially put back when I came here and saw that id have to flip through an entire section of the LAT to get to the LA part. so i am just as happy with this improvement as many of those who ive talked with about this.
Vinny: Who would win in a fight, a taco or a grilled cheese sandwich?
as someone who has faught both a taco and a grilled cheese sandwich, let me say this, soft tacos are a piece of cake. but hard tacos, especially if the shell is stale can do some damage and you have to watch out if the salsa is extra picante. with that said cheese can clog your arteries when youre not looking. thus stick to fighting soft tacos whenever possible.
raspberry: Do you still love me, even though I don’t take naughty photos all the time?
i love canadian girls the closer they live to canada, the singler they are, and the more they send me nude pix. because youve moved to america, gotten hitched, and put on yr clothes my love for you has decreased slightly. fortunately nothing in here is true. thanks for the pics.
anti: What should an ambitious journalism student’s 5-year-plan look like?
year one, write every day (xcept Sundays) for a blog like LAist year two, learn video editing and do a video interview every day with someone year three, take photos every day for a blog like LAist year four, take HTML, CSS, javascript, SEO, and flash classes. also read every book by hemingway and tolstoy. year five, create a blog called Dead Blog. every day write an obituary.
when youre done with this plan you will probably be more prepared for modern journalism than 99% of the kids in j school today.
lemei: fight or flight?
the lord gave us two fists two knees two elbows and zero wings for a reason. eff em up and blog about it.
