Monthly Archives: December 2020

humans are complicated, im no different

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like a lot of people i have low self esteem

i think it dates back to being a Cub fan at an early age and endured decades of them losing

some people combat it by doing this or that to their bodies or accumulating a lot of wealth

clearly i didnt think those were the correct paths

but even today the weirdest things hurt me deeply.

say i write you an email, maybe two, and you dont write back. even though i might know how busy you are, i take it very personally.

very.

which is weird because i have put myself out there since college writing for newspapers, web sites, social media platforms, you quickly develop a thick skin. and i dont mind if strangers say my wild take on this or that is crazy or they disagree with it. i expect that.

it’s when people enter into a conversation with me and then they give me the cold shoulder when i reply is when i get sad.

it’s like, would they do that to tom petty?

but im a different tp. my brain says, they do that to you because they can. you have not created a persona that makes that not an option.

but then i think about super cool people who have done super cool things, like springsteen or obama or even jesus.

those guys get dissed to this day.

church on Sunday was talking about John the Baptist and how special he was even when he was in utero.

his reward: beheading.

so maybe not having a couple emails returned during a dark and busy time isn’t that bad in comparison.

if anything it gives me more time to write the next American Girl.

today was sad for Cub fans for two reasons

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first the Cubs announced they would be letting Kyle Schwarber join free agency.

Schwarber the loveable pudgy catcher who was moved to outfield once Willson Contreras developed into a flashy all star.

Schwarber the heart of the team that, like a cow, had several stomachs that were also hearts.

Schwarber who once hit a ball so far that it landed ontop of a scoreboard and instead of trying to take it down, the grounds crew built a little glass case around it so it could live there forever.

then the Twitter leaked the news that Len Kasper, the mild mannered announcer who often said how much he loved WGN because unlike other outlets didn’t force he and JD to wear shirts and ties.

but then the Cubs ownership created its own Cubs network… and made the boys wear ties.

so he quit and allegedly got picked up by the enemy, the White Sox.

is life terrible?

sometimes, yes. very much so.

but sometimes life is beautiful and these two men gave us so much joy

so much life

so much hope

and i am so grateful to them for that.

 

 

2020 will probably be the year i’ve blogged here the least

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let’s list the reasons this was probably the case

  • i wrote a buttload on Los Angeleno
  • pandemics aren’t fun
  • often when i work from offices i’ll blog when im bored
  • any time i had a good idea i’d either write it for work or tweet it
  • i struggled writing for Los Angeleno many nights, so for damn sure i wouldnt blog and take whatever magic was left for this old friend
  • my favorite things to blog about — sports, movies, and concerts — were practically non existant
  • i wrote politics mostly on facebook where others could easily share in the discussion
  • im not the blogger i once was

took a long walk today and saw a dead person

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as you know i like to talk to people.

mostly because i ask easy questions and people generally answer them, and as they do, they tell me things i would have never expected.

before we saw the dead person we walked past a bus driver taking a break.

i asked him, “have bus drivers here in LA been catching The Rona?”

he said, “you’re talking to one of them.”

he told us that unlike many, he didn’t lose his sense of taste or smell, but “felt like shit” for a few days. he took a test and it came back negative. then he took another test a few days later when he was super achey and he got a positive result.

he said he was sick for an entire month.

after a while he got a little better but he was rushed back to work because the benefits were running out. he explained that this was early into the plague so the union didn’t know how much time to demand that sick drivers should have off.

he said he knows of over 100 LA bus drivers that have gotten COVID.

then we walked a half block up and saw a couple of police cars and the coroner’s van. a homeless person had died. a photographer from Getty was there and a homeless worker who provides free showers was there too.

the latter tried to shake my hand as we introduced ourselves.

over 6,000 people in LA today got COVID. next week that number might jump past 8,000.

i have to stop walking around.

it’s tough because the weather is getting nicer and i sure could use the exercise but Hollywood is cray.