ugly secret: i don’t know whats going to be successful online

when im not kissing pretty girls, im putting things up on the internet hoping they will get seen.

is there an art to it? no.

are there people who are good at it? yes.

is their batting average super high? no.

in baseball if you fail 7 out of 10 times you become a millionaire. but if you fail 8 times out of 10 you lose your job.

in internet if you fail 80 times out of 100 nobody even notices. in fact you only have to succeed, like really succeed maybe 3 or 4 times all year to be respected. and even then you probably wont even get respect because come on, it’s the internet.

dude who sang Chocolate Rain has a million subscribers on YouTube. online popularity is as predictable and fleeting as a butterfly in a hurricane.

which brings us to the truth. ive met lots of people and ive seen them try.

and thats the root of most success no matter what it is: try.

keep experimenting. keep working at it. adjust. study the trends. be one with the rules. break the rules.

but above all i believe this: the good stuff will rise to the top. it always has and it always will. Van Gogh is the exception. but if that fucker lived today and had an Insta he’d be paying cash; first class – sitting next to Vanna White.

i also believe that we all have something to contribute. we may not all know how to paint a sunflower or sing a song but i have known too many people – and they all have something. that means you and you and you. we proved that with LAist. we see it online.

brands cannot compete with the average joe. perfect example. Jimmy Kimmel is super popular. he has a TV show on ABC. his BFF is Howard Stern. pretty much everyone loves him except for people who love Trump so much that they hate that Jimmy believes that everyone should have healthcare.

the other day he had on Chris Pratt and Tom Holland, two Marvel stars. their video clip is #16 in Trending right now on YouTube and it has amassed 1.6 million views. which is good. but again it’s Jimmy, Spider-man and Star Lord talking about Valentine’s Day *on* Valentines Day.

meanwhile there’s emma chamberlain.

emma is not a tv or movie star. she has acne. she is 18. she does not dress slutty or twerk (unless ironically) and in her latest video that she posted 5 days ago she goes over her videos of the last 2-3 years.

which is vintage/oldschool/ancient if you are 18.

1.8 million views.

you and i are closer to being emma than we are Spider-man.

marketing is baloney.

SEO and *when* to post and keywords are lies.

make good content. do it a lot. be yourself. keep it real.

stare in to the unblinking eye of the void and say

hi baby.

do it all the time and good things will happen.

we have a president who doesn’t know fucking shit and he gets to do anything he wants.

in many ways thats what makes this pinball machine so beautiful and so frightening.

i love you all and i always will and i will share my secrets with you because the game changes every day so fuckit.

i hope you get everything you want in life.

and if not in life, i hope you have a day today or a night tonight that is cooler than it is shitty.