Tag Archives: hockey

how do you prove you’re creative

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how do you show someone you’re the one

how do you say im a great leader but im also good on a team

what if you show them a goal where its you and four of them

and they say but wheres your teammates?

can you say my teammates are in my heart?

can you say my teammates passed me the puck?

can you say my teammates are the wind beneath my wings?

how do you do anything if you think about it so much?

yogi berra was in this terrible slump and his manager casey stengel was all, yogi do this

then his teammate mickey mantle said, yo yogi try this

then his other teammate billy martin said, pizan why arent you doing this?

so yogi went to the plate and struck out.

he moped back to the dugout and before anyone could say anything he yelled

I CANT THINK AND HIT AT THE SAME TIME!

how do you tell them you could always hit

how do you tell them the luck in your life has always been your great teams

not your hits?

and your wins were always shared experiences that you loved loved loved

which is why youre still friends with everyone.

nothing says Christmas like a good hockey fight,

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and last night the Kings and the Senators racked up over 250 penalty minutes for the kids.

Now the NHL swore a few years ago that they were going to crack down on fighting in hockey but I’m glad to see that they are soberring up.

Best part about a hockey fight is when the goalies get involved. Usually what happens is some guy slams into one of the goalies on accident (or not on accident) and all hell breaks loose. Last night this one guy just started fucking with the goalie and the goalie fucked back and they slapped each other and then one of the goalies teammates started slapping the one guy and then the goalie of the other team skated all the way down the ice to the other end and started fighting the other goalie.

See, only goalies can fight each other. It’s an unwritten rule. If a non-goalie wants to start shit, and he tries it with a goalie, the whole damn other team will jump him. It’s crazy.

So both goalies were going at it and both teams were going at it and one of the goalies was trying to punch but he couldnt get his glove off. So he had the other goalie with one hand, holding him, and with his free hand he was trying to throw his glove off, but it wouldnt go. So he slowly made his way – opposing goalie in hand (beating him) – to his bench and reached his glove hand to his teammates who pulled his glove off to the cheers of all the kids.

Then both goalies went at it some more.

Fucking love puck.

Fucking love all of you.

Fucking Merry Christmas everyone.

P.S. Thanks Amy for the Wisdom Teeth Wisdom: she says drink a half gallon of pineapple juice before the yanking to prevent swelling!

PPS Thanks to CC for the buck for the Snoop DeVille!!! Right on, bro. We’re up to $322 – tell your friends.

PPPS: Thanks Gannon for getting the Winona Christmas cds, they should be there tomorrow – merci!

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