mcdonalds has mozzarella sticks


ramie is a beautiful woman who loves mcdonalds nearly as much as i do. tonight i was all i hear they have a new thing going on over there. she said what, i said i dont know thats why i wanna go and find out.

IMG_6670i thought i heard they had this thing where you could get two small things for $2 and it turned out to be true.

you could get small fries, a chicken sandwich, a mcdouble, or three mozzarella sticks.

mozzarella sticks?!?!

indeed. so i was all fuckit i want like those, some fries, a mcchicken and some mcnuggets

the sticks were fine, but petite. sorta not worth it even for a buck. maybe if you have a kid.

and the weird thing is they dont have any options to get any larger size. like id pay $5 to get 20 of them. brotha needs 20. they also have to figure out how to make them stringier. the marinara sauce was fine, but any time im sitting down at a mcdonalds – which is rare – and i ordered something dippable, i’ll ask for hot mustard.

hot mustard is something no other mcdonalds has. they should exploit that.

they should introduce a new character

something sexy, and yellow, and spicy and delicious that adds a punch whatever it’s spread on.

angry drunk marge simpson?

how to get more McNuggets for your McMoney

as you know i eat mcdonalds all the time. i eat it less now that my nutritionist can track my every move via my iPhone. but i will have cheerleaders make McRuns for me – usually in the middle of the night.

one thing i have noticed is how much more fast food is costing than in the past.

i remember a day when a $2.99 value meal was commonplace. now its rare. and usually only includes a small pop.

today on Digg, i saw a story that gives those of us who enjoy mcnuggets a way to beat the system!

Depending on where you live, your [four] nuggets cost a buck if you get them on the Dollar Menu. That’s a quarter each. Get 10, and you pay around $4, or 40¢ each. Spring for the whole 20-piece banquet, and the price is more than $7, or 35¢ per bird chunk.

If you really want 20 nuggets (and I must remind you that chickens do not actually produce nuggets in nature), just buy five orders off the Dollar Menu and you can save two bucks. Two bucks! Most of us assume that the larger portion options and set meals are available because they offer economy of scale. Clearly, that’s a Kroc.

read the whole deal here, but make sure you run a few miles after you have digested your McGreasy

went to the mcdonalds today for lunch

it was packed because ronald mcdonald hisself was scheduled to make an appearance.

his advancemen, Grimace, and some weird bird looking chick were already there shaking hands with the little tykes.

the kids were confused.

they kept screaming ronald ronald! until someone said, thats not ronald.

then the kids would cry and drop their ice milk cone or little toy.

who expected such free entertainment at noon?

my crying children glee was crushed when some woman handed me a flier telling me that this week was Turn Off Your TV Week.

why do people who hand me this shit always have canvas bags?

canvas bags filled with paper that will get tossed on the ground as quickly as it’s read scanned?

the babe who drove me to the restaurant was leaving but not before i reminded the woman that this country was founded on television.

she said no it was not!

i said look it up in one of your fancy books! i said after al gore invented it, THATS when the italians decided to come to america, to see what shit we had on our tvs.

the woman was clearly shocked that someone wouldnt agree with her fascist agenda.

turn off the tv!

i said, why dont you stop buying gasoline for a week? mankind has lived thousands of years without petrolium fueled automobiles.

she said, i have to take my kids around.

i said bullpucky. get the kids on the bus. let them learn first hand what its like to save the planet. they take the bus to get to school, let them take the bus to the grocery store. when you can only eat what you can carry you end up not buying so much crap i told her and slammed the passenger side door and dug into my french fries.

and took a big suck of chocolate shake.

she said read a book!

i said woman i write a book a year dont tell me what to do. this is america. only the religious right can tell me what to do. and we sped off without signaling properly. cuz we’re punkrock.

laura + mefi is all over this + zulieka in prague