and i love mariah carey.

two girls were feeding each other french fries at the fairfax blvd carls jr about three blocks from beverly hills.

danielle and i were having lunch and she had never been to a carls jr which i believe in the south theyre called hardee’s.

basically a notch nicer burger king where you order and someone brings it out to you on a plastic tray at your seat.

i like the western bacon cheeseburger because they put an onion ring under the meat patty.

danielle got the chicken strips and kept saying things like do you know how much fat is probably in this.

i was all, but its chicken.

she said, cuz its fried.

i was like, chinese people eat shrimp fried rice all the damn time, and tempura, and theyre not fat.

she squinted her eyes and said what about buddah.

the couple across from us were ellllllllderly. and dude didnt get the concept at all. a lady was sweeping up and he was all are you a waitress are you a waitress. she was no waitress but she helped the couple and smiled cuz its all good.

danielle ate a fry and then another and then told me to get them away from her.

a lady in a nice blouse tucked into some smooth slacks sat alone behind me and across the aisle.

danielles eyes got big and she said omg that womans fly is down.

i was all shhhh

she said what should i do i have to tell her and i said no you dont.

and just then she got up and walked past us on cue and she got a newspaper and came back and danielle said did you see that.

and i did.

still i wouldnt let her say anything and she said should i write her a little note.

and i was all pdq

and she said what

i said pdq xyz, didnt you ever say that at school.

and she laughed at me right there in the almost beverly hills carls jr.

and i was all seriously and she said what on earth would that mean and i said i cant believe you didnt say this it meant pretty darn quick examine your zipper

she said, you lie.

and i said fine then, go up to her and say pdq xyz and wink

but instead of winking she pointed and totally ruined the perfect science experiment. again.

allison + it was jays birthday yesterday + random complaints

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