“why doesn’t the Instapundit ever actually write anything? Why does he only have one-sentence statements ending in a link to some one?”

critics might say that the good professor keeps it simple because when he actually writes he ends up with unfortunate posts like the one he attatched his name to last night regarding the Jeff Gannon affair.

“SOME PEOPLE ARE GETTING DESPERATE,” the world’s greatest blogger typed last night and it’s true. When big time bloggers who have made a healthy living criticizing reporters, newspapers, and media outlets suddenly look the other way when the White House gets caught with their pants down by letting a gay male prostitute pretend to be a journalist for a fake news agency that’s one thing, but when they try to attack those who question, now thats desperate.

Witness:

“Actually, I have blogged about Gannon/Guckert quite a few times, as a simple search would illustrate. But I agree with Rik Hertzberg that it’s a nothinggate. Or, as Marc Cooper says, a ‘big yawn.’ I don’t think it’s in any way comparable to the use of forged documents in an attempt to swing a Presidential election — and I think that anyone who does think so is pretty much beyond rational discourse. “

could you imagine if i said something like “if anyone disagrees with me, they are pretty much beyond rational discourse”?

that’s desperation kids poorly disguised as arrogance.

it’s also desperate when you find yourself choosing strange bedfellows like who the instapundit selected by chosing David Corn as a temporary ally to strengthen his weak defense.

Corn, author of “The Lies of George W. Bush: Mastering the Politics of Deception” has an agenda when he mildly defends Gannon. Corn wants the same sort of access as Gannon. And, really, who wouldn’t want a free pass to the White House to publicly ask questions to the mouthpeice(s) of the most powerful country in the world.

“Listen to David Corn,” Glenn begs. OK, “George W. Bush is a liar.”

Oh wait, he means listen to David Corn only about Jeff Gannon. And he graciously picks and chooses quotes for us to listen to. Although he invites us to “read the whole thing,” as always it’s interesting what quotes mr. reynolds leaves out.

Here’s some of what Mr. Corn wrote for The Nation today in his opening paragraph about the scandal

Gannon/Guckert was a conservative reporter for a marginal news outfit who obtained a daily pass to the White House press office and who also apparently was seeking customers as a gay, military-oriented prostitute. Serious questions do remain as to why and how the Bush White House’s press operation granted access to Gannon/Guckert, a correspondent for the Talon News. Should a fellow with a fake identity–and a questionable background–be allowed into presidential press conferences? Talon News was connected to GOPUSA, an organization run by Texas-based Republican activist Bobby Eberle, and Gannon/Guckert routinely asked softball questions of Bush’s press secretaries during their daily White House briefings.

does the biggest blogger alive include any of that in his post? what do you think?

what insty does include on instapundit.com is Corn wondering aloud if the scandal is smaller than it seems (whatever that means – how big/small is it David?), he asks aloud if the fake reporter has been given a “bum rap” (do tell, how has our fake reporter for the fake agency been wronged? after all the agency itself even took down all of his stories – and their entire site – in shame), and he warns bloggers who want to attack gannon that they might not be invited to the next conventions.

as if going to a convention and sitting next to a delegate dressed like a peanut is anything like sitting feet away from the president of the united states and asking questions based on laughable falseties whose sole purpose is to allow the commander in cheif look better.

why does the professor want us to listen to david corn, again?

bloggers are invited to political conventions not just because it looks like the parties are reaching out but because it’s free publicity for their propagandafest.

correct me if i am wrong, but white house press conferences are not propagandafests. or has that changed with this administration too?

finally glenn shows his last bit of desperation by trying to say that bringing up the fact that Gannon/Guckert was exposed for being a gay male prostitute as being “gay-baiting”.

it’s not gay-baiting, it’s not straight-baiting, it’s just the damn fact.

and it’s funny.

yes, glenn, it is funny when the white house breaks its own rules, and lets a gay male hooker into the white house for the sole purpose of allowing him access and the freedom to lob softballs to the press secretary and the president.

it’s funny because this is the same administration that won a second term because they allegedly triumphed in convincing the red state voters that they were bringing morality back to the white house

when indeed they were bringing gay male hookers into the white house

to kiss up to the president.

nobody that i have read has ever said that guckert should be kicked out of the press room because he liked men instead of women.

the people who i have read have said that guckert should be kicked out of the press room because he is not a member of the press and does not work for a press agency.

the fact that he is a gay male hooker and the fact that it was easy for bloggers to discover that he was a gay male hooker is simply proof that the secret service and/or the white house did very little background checking on the man who was given a two-year day pass.

that fact is something that the biggest right wing blogger in the world would rather not talk about and instead keeps trying to bring up dan rather as a deflection.

a weak

sad

pathetic

and yes, desperate

deflection.

either my hero needs to enter into serious, adult discussions about this matter, or to go back to linking to the right and keeping his sentences short and transparent, which i imagine he will go back to doing.

especially surrounding this scandal, because he is dead wrong about it, and just as hypocritical about as the white house, because Lord knows if this had happened with a Dem in office, the instapundit would be going crazy.

especially when it’s an administration who now has been discovered to have paid off six other journalists.

that my friends is a scandal, this is just the gay male hooker fake reporter cherry on top.

jeff gannon’s blog + $10,000 reward for gannon stories + “when the white house stages its own Daily Show”

has written me to offer to dress my new swedish virgin girlfriend. and it’s appreciated but they send these super sexy sultry colorfully sassy lovely things but my girl is a born again who has never worn a skirt above her knee ever.

and might not ever.

and i laugh when that tries to sink in because things like that shouldnt sink in which is why i laugh em right back out.

so pure she jumps when i rest my hand on her thigh, pushes it away to the knee, and smirks when i try to convince her that the thigh is where a mans hand should be when hes driving with his girlfriend.

has the cutest little cold sore on account of her lack of sleep. poor angel has been working her tail off at the nine-to-five and then filling sandbags at the ymca at night for the flood victims. angel i tell you. so because of the cold sore she doesnt want to kiss. so i kiss the corner of her mouth and try to sneak a tounge in there but no go. now and then she’ll sneak one out but thats it. its cute though and when you do get a little tounge action it feels ten times better cuz you dont expect it.

makes you wanna say, baby if youre saying that cold sore is contagious, im saying i dont care. im saying rub your lip across my back and spell out your name cuz i want even the man on the moon to know the truth.

and she giggles which is very nice.

i quieted that giggle tonight when i reminded her that not so deep inside of me is a darkness cute little swedish girls probably shouldnt mix themselves in with. for im 111 yrs old and thats not dog years whos been around the block a few times and on top of that really truly does work for the xbi so has not only seen everything but has made some of that shit happen including some shit that didnt wanna happen but did happen. but she doesnt flinch and its not all cuz of ignorance, shes just never flinched.

infact tonight we were parked in the lot of the ninety nine cents store on sunset in a strip mall that once housed a strip club called tulips. i was all, get it? get it? and she gets it. and we were in that car talking and a woman stood outside our window waiting for us to get out so she could spare change us but we just stayed in the car talking. stayed in there so long the woman eventually collected about $46 and went home.

talked about all of our favorite things – the good book, television, los angeles. no flinching. except when she said, i always feel so comfortable with you tony. and i said yeah? and put my hand on her thigh.

and tomorrow night she will see her first tsar concert at the El Cid on sunset in silverlake, which will be their first show on TVT Records, so dont be suprised if they put on an inspired set for their new label. special guests the ettes.

from today’s Los Angeles Times

CHICAGO — The foul ball that unraveled the Cubs’ chance for a World Series appearance and left fans steaming is now simmering in a red spaghetti sauce.

Harry Caray’s Restaurant Group last year bought and destroyed the infamous “Bartman” ball, an object that to superstitious Cub fans became the ultimate symbol of bad luck.

Now a restaurant is using the ball’s shredded remains as an ingredient in its “Foul Ball” spaghetti. Since the dish was unveiled Monday, about 1,000 people have paid $11.95 to sample it. Proceeds are going to the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation.

Cubs faithful from Fargo, N.D., have driven more than 600 miles to taste it. Fans from England and Italy have asked the restaurant to ship them the pungent sauce.

“The start of baseball season is coming. We have to do something to prepare,” said Grant DePorter, the managing partner of Harry Caray’s restaurant, founded by and named after the late Cubs announcer.

During the 2003 National League championship series, Steve Bartman — a loyal Cub fan — inadvertently knocked the ball out of left fielder Moises Alou’s reach. The Cubs were leading the Florida Marlins 3-0 — just five outs from a trip to the World Series. The Marlins rallied to win Game 6 and took Game 7 to advance to the World Series — where the Cubs haven’t been since 1945.

The Bartman ball was blown apart last February, reduced to a pile of shredded wool, twine, leather and rubber. But its destruction failed to bring about the much-hoped-for result — a World Series berth last year — which led tens of thousands of fans to e-mail or call DePorter.

They begged for one thing: Finish the job.

“We went through all the messages, and there were three common pleas,” DePorter said.

Drown the remains in beer. Pierce them with a laser beam. Eat them.

DePorter decided to do all three — just in case.

Last week, the restaurant assembled a team of local advisors that included a chemistry expert from Northwestern University, a registered dietitian from Thorek Hospital and a staff member from a food-testing laboratory.

They had to figure out a way to blend the ball’s remains into something that would be safe to eat.

“Once all the leather and the rubber were removed, we were left with natural fibers,” said Krista Wennerstrom, director of nutrition for Thorek Hospital and a “serious” Cub fan. The fibers were tossed into a big container of beer seasoned with rosemary, thyme, oregano and bay leaves.

“We boiled it, then it went through a distilling and purifying process,” Wennerstrom said.

The result was nearly a gallon of a clear, pungent liquid — which was zapped with low-powered laser beams. Finally, it was blended with the restaurant’s regular marinara recipe.

“The flavor’s a bit on the smoky side,” said Paul Katz, the restaurant’s executive chef.

The city’s health department gave the all-clear after making sure “there would be no actual horsehide or rubber bits in the sauce,” spokesman Tim Hadac said.

Cub fans John Perrone and his 20-year-old son, Jeff, drove from northwest Indiana Wednesday to sample the sauce. As they dabbed up the last bits with bread, they said they hoped it would help end the team’s bad luck.

“It’s ridiculous. But I thought, if it’ll help, what do I have to lose?” said Perrone, 48. “It was pretty good. It didn’t taste like rawhide at all.”

Katz’s recipe calls for 4 ounces of the ball-flavored juice to every 8 gallons of marinara sauce. Since Monday, he’s used about one-fourth of the “Foul Ball” liquid.

“It has to be gone before the first tickets go on sale” Friday, DePorter said. “We’ll start adding more to the sauce.”

baron davis goes to golden state + chris webber traded to 76ers + Nazr goes to the Spurs

im surrounded by cute girls but she may take the cake.

still its hard for me not to talk about the most disgusting things while we’re having a romantic italian dinner while sipping on house wine.

she says she read my post about porn and she says that porn grosses her out more than anything in the world and i say thats interesting because if i hadnt found the Lord i would have definately been the worlds greatest porno director.

the owner/waiter dude was dressed so well, he gives everyone a free “taste” of wine as a greeting cuz the place is so damn classy. im going to unload my whole bankroll on this girl before the dentist takes it but it doesnt matter. there were little spoiled kids of the rich running around because their parents dont know how to talk with them when the mexican nanny isnt around.

i say i would come out with a new porn each month. and each month it would be of a different genre. one month a western. a real western. saloon fights, a washed up sherrif, a whore house avec madame, indians who want to invade, rum runners, everything.

the next month i would come out with a real 75 nurse orgy, where yes there would be 75 nurses in a heap during the spectacular thirty minute finale. all nurse conventions end this way, dont they?

the next month would feature a spoof on the brady bunch. they werent really brothers and sisters anyway, plus, well, lets just say the phrase “mom always said, dont ball in the house” will get used.

she plays with her spinach salad not at all impressed by my stream of conscious brilliance and i remember that she meant it when she said that porn disgusts her even though shes never seen one frame of it ever.

i explain that in a normal porn, if theres a movie called the Pizza Boy, when the dude shows up and the daisy duke wearing co-ed cant seem to find her purse, they get it on. but in a busblog production when they got it on it would be ridiculously well lit and they would suddenly have totally combed hair and pirate costumes and everything would be in slow motion, they would defy gravity, midgets would peek out from the closets and psycedelic trails would emerge from their limbs to symbolize that it was all a dream.

shes still not convinced and i tell her, i’ll put together a scene for you one day cuz its sorta hard to conceive over dinner.

she says you do that and orders up some more bread.

so cute america and not at all the future her parents would have wished for her.

little did i know but ten minutes later my anestetia would wear off and the rattling that the dentist gave to my head would turn into the most wicked headache that ive ever had, and even though paul westerbergs label put me on the guest list, plus one, i wouldnt be able to even stand being in a coffee bean parking lot, let alone endure the throbbing PA from the cozy rock club.

so at 9pm we called it a night after i downed three advil and watched Lost.

at midnight i awoke refreshed and ready to rock

and grateful for the man or woman who invented drugs.

cuz sometimes they work.

and even though LA has looked so bleh lately, this morning it was back to being my lady.

vivian + elgin roots + whitey + after the debauchery

trust me im not that big a deal.

some send cds, some dvds, some send themselves.

they all want to be mentioned in the busblog.

its very nice.

recently someone sent some coupons for a netflix type organization. the nice part about them is that they are the xxx version of netflix. xxxflixxx lets call them.

xxxflixxx has a ginormous catalogue of new and old adult dvds, which is great for a guy like me who enjoys seeing people dressing sexy and talking sexy and being happy, but because ive been busy saving the world the last 78 years i havent been able to watch kid films let alone adult films.

this company has been very generous with what i can order and because they want me to test out their system they tell me that i can order and return anything they want as much as i want.

since i dont know what to order i usually choose by name of the film.

the sopornos caught my eye, but wasnt very good.

an officer and a gentlewhore got my vote, but that too was of poor quality and the actors didnt seem to know their lines.

last night i came home tired and wet from the huge rainstorms that have been beating on our fair city and i saw a dripping wet package at my door.

i opened the familiar dvd case and there it was

75 Nurse Orgy.

how can you lose with such a title?

sadly friends, you can lose.

it wasnt 75 nurses going nuts, it was small groups of 5-7 nurses smiling and laughing and, well, some things were lighted a little too well, some things didnt need to lit at all. and so yes, 12 scenese starring 5-7 “nurses” does add up to 75 but it was cheating.

they even shared uniforms.

in every scene there was a nurse in a pink outfit, one in a blue, two in white, etc. just like in every other scene.

some of these women didnt even look like nurses!

i was very disappointed and returned my dvd first thing this morning.

great concept but my only suggestion for xxxflixxx is that perhaps they can hire a bunch of experts to recommend films. im not sure how they can do it but some of us know nothing about this genre and maybe we can fill out some sort of questionairre and we can — aw forget it, i’ll just go back to chosing films the olde fashioned way – waiting for the girls to get on howard stern and ordering it from who was cool with howard.

im off to get a crown for my tooth. wish me well.

i will return bankrupt but with a fairly new tooth that cost the price of a used car.

betablog + the overflow + sutter

pink haired girl

you come to me and how cant i fall in love
pouty lips and complaints
my god the dance
of looks to your toes and back at me
i know my eyes
arent made of bad memories
and still you flinch
i dont even mind the boring brown lipstick look
and powder guck that you seem to adore

and of course i see thru those sunglasses
move your fat ass and quit acting
like your velvet panties i wanna see a girl
not a music box ballerina whose
never been fingered in a backseat valhalla
how long you been in america

fairies are fun but come on
and i wondered what old ladies
who brush their poodles looked like
when they were in art school

bacon whores + buzzmachine + flaming mound of shit extinguished after four months

i will seriously cover baseball in the busblog. the national pastime. the reason for everything. what seperates us from the monkeys.

baseball. where two words evoke more hope and good feelings than even “free beer”

pitchers and catchers.

the palm reader said she had good news and bad news for me. i said give me the good.

she said you will have a beautiful girlfriend who will be loyal and bright and openminded and honest and giving and risking and wonderful and cute.

and then she gave me the bad news.

but she will be a veer gin.

i have a swedish palm reader.

but she knew enough about my sensibilities to say, but pitchers and catchers report in a week.

that was several weeks ago and all of her predictions were right.

and tonight i will see rock music with her and today i will consider blogging about the greatest sport of all, and tomorrow i will wake up alone in my bachelor pad without the girl who i call mine

without sammy sosa at ho ho kam park

with a blog that will never be as dynamic and indepth and accurate and revealing and as wonderful as mr gleemans

but not everything is in the cards the palm reader often says and i say youre a palm reader and she says not everything that needs to be seen can be seen in your hand

gladly.

so she shuffles the deck and i cut it and she spreads out a row of cards, flips one over and then another

and then another

and then sighs

and then she flips over the last card and looks me in the eye and i dont see a smile on her face but i dont see horror in there either.

she reading the cards and me reading her

its a fascinating standoff of bullshit artists trying to read between the lines of lies

scientists with no proper education theorizing theories

she asks for my hand and i give it to her

she holds it palm up

takes my fingers to her upturned nose and inhales

her eyes get big and she says youve cheated on her and i protest

for i havent

she says but but

i say sometimes when i get nervous i like to put my hands in my armpits like this and

she laughs

shes always trying to fake me out and im always trying to freak her out

she says that girl will be a woman before the springtime

i ask before opening day?

she says before they break camp.

and thats how you get a big tip.

xtraxyx + kitty bukkake + tao of poker

“America is and was and has always been full of mealy-mouth writers and soul-sucks who apologize and equivocate to Power & Ideology. Hunter Thompson will stand as the Writer of his time who saw the Horror and did not Deny and did not Flinch. Who saw that America was Dying, but that it was still hella Funny. Who was Bold and Strong Enough to be Heard.”

– Thor Garcia, eulogizing Hunter S. Thompson’s suicide.

“i have cramps so bad i want to stand in fire with a jug of gasoline.”

– Raymi, who also has the cutest new background

“There is still, however a legal extermination of human beings who have been conceived but not yet born. And this time we are talking about an extermination which has been allowed by nothing less than democratically elected parliaments where one normally hears appeals for the civil progress of society and all humanity”

– The Pope, from his new book “Memory and Identity” where he calls gay marriage part of the “ideology of evil”

“The sports world is as bad as it is because this is the only business that allows you guys in our office to begin with. You can’t just go to Bank of America, walk in the office, start interviewing employees. Just the sports world. Well, what for? Well, we don’t want to get into the money aspect of it; we’ll leave that to the side.

“But now, don’t turn it into a spectacle now just because you have the freedom to come into our office and snoop and make up stories if you choose to, because, you know, a lot of it’s not true. I mean, baseball players, every baseball player I know of, and I’ve been around this game since I was a child, all care about this game, all love this game, all have had their own personal problems or non-personal problems. But for the most part, no one goes out there and wants to embarrass the game of baseball, no one wants to go out there and embarrass themselves. I don’t want to go out there and embarrass myself in front of people. I don’t want people looking down on me. No one does.”

– Barry Bonds, during a heated press conference this morning

“My daughter’s CD player broke a few weeks ago and my wife suggested that we get her a cutesy replacement CD player with Hello Kitty on it or something. Last night at the store I saw an iPod bumping the tunes inside of one of the donut-shaped JBL OnStage speakers and got all excited. Screw Hello Kitty, I think I’m going to get her her own iPod. It’s cuter.

“Update: Wifey put the kibosh on the kiddie iPod (“she’s THREE YEARS OLD”). And she has a point. Hello, kitty!”

– Jeff McManus on being entranced at an Apple Store

“Many people have talked about the Guckert/Gannon story, so I won’t add anything to it except that Keith Olbermann has a funny column on it. His name (Olbermann’s) came up in a game of Celebrity several months ago, and the only person who knew it was somebody who used to follow sports. This is what you get for a bunch of people who are all, Oh yes, Thomas Merton, Baudrillard, blah blah blah but they don’t watch television so what good are they.”

– SK Smith, after describing herself and her lover as lazy lazy shitbags

“The Kiss off Kiss Me, Kiss Me, Kiss Me. Lots and lots of wah…”

– Dave Navarro, on being asked what’s his favorite Cure song

“You guys, it’s like, what, I mean, you can’t — it’s almost comical, basically.

“I mean, we’ve got alcohol that’s the No. 1 killer in America and we legalize that to buy in the store. You’ve got, you know, you’ve got tobacco number two, three killer in America, we legalize that. There’s other issues.

“You guys are going to be the same people next week as some tragedy happened, how we need to save our children and everything else and next week, you’re the same people sitting there coming, how we should be doing this and how we’re evil people, or, you know, you guys, it’s one thing after another. You know, pick one side or the other.

“Are y’all going to be good people or are you all going to be who you are and make the game or sports what it is? It’s become ‘Hard Copy’ all day long.

“Are you guys jealous? Upset? Disappointed? What?”

– Barry Bonds, after being asked if awards should be taken back if the player is found to have performed on steriods

“asshole.”

– Raspil Iverson, eulogizing the suicide of Dr. Thompson, concluding with something about a pig fucker.

“I’ll warn you now, that this paragraph is going to contain a lot of crazy shit that went on last night, but oh well! It was Ashley’s 21st birthday, so we had to party hard.

“The night started off eating at T.G.I.Friday’s as expected. It ended up being a whole bunch of us; Ashley, her mom and two cousins, Jeff, Nicole, Ashley’s boyfriend Nate, his two friends (whose names I can’t remember), Sara, Kristin, Tabatha, and Myself. We seriously had the funnest time downing electric lemonades and margaritas. Then around 10, the limo picked us up and we stopped off to get the partying favors. Three cases of beer, 5 bottles of wine, and we had a bottle of vodka, a bottle of rum, and a bottle of tequila. Oh man, I should have known from that sign that it was going to be a harsh night. We decided to go to Cocoa Beach, but to be honest, I don’t remember much of Cocoa Beach besides playing under the pier and rolling around in the sand with Tabatha. In the hour drive to Cocoa, I downed a shot of vodka and a couple of glasses of wine. I was so wasted, it was a joke. At one point, the limo pulled over and there were about 5 of us squatting on the side of the road. I was so worried about tinkling on myself, I nearly tumbled down a hill and everyone was making me laugh my ass off. By the time we got to Cocoanuts on the Beach, I was just gone. It was dead, so I guess we just decided to play on the beach. Not exactly sure what we did, but I do have pictures of me posing on a fake wave and board, laying in the sand with Tabatha, Kristin’s butt, etc. Just ridiculous. Way fun though!”

– Renee, who did warn us

“I don’t know what cheating is. I don’t know cheating, if steroid is going to help you in baseball. I just don’t believe it. I don’t believe steroids can help you, eye/hand coordination, technically hit a baseball, I just don’t believe it and that’s just my opinion.”

– Barry Bonds, answering the question “Do you view the use of steroid as cheating?”

“All you guys lied. All of y’all and the story or whatever have lied. Should you have asterisk behind your name? All of you lied. All of you have said something wrong. All of you have dirt. All of you. When your closet’s clean, then come clean somebody else’s. But clean yours first, okay.”

– Barry Bonds after being asked if he thinks more players will admit steroid use

“You know, the part that I lose sleep over is my family and my family and my kids and what pain — which I say — should I blame you guys for it? There’s no facts on Barry Bonds, but should I blame you? Who should I blame? Who should I blame for the things that go on that my kids have to listen to, who should I blame? You know, I don’t. I tell my kids, you know what, just don’t be famous. You don’t want it, don’t be famous. You know what, let people say whatever they are going to say.”

– Barry Bonds, being asked if he has lost sleep over this controversy

thunder echo + gorilla mask + wil wheaton on dr. gene

and its raining all over la.

not nice little cute, boy-we-need-it, rain. this is forrest gump rain. sideways rain. upside down rain. ricochetting angry rain from a dark place.

certainly not the type of day one would want for miss never been kissed.

drew barrymore was born into hollywood royalty in an ordinary hospital room in the less than glamorous town of culver city, california. closer to south central la than to hollywood but its all good. she found her way into our hearts in no time with the little indie flick ET.

ET was the first movie that i ever saw twice, and i wasnt the only one.

aliens, kids, moms, foreigners. everyone saw ET and nobody admitted to seeing it because of drew but look at her career, she kept making films but ET never did. hardly anyone did

although i hear the director is still picking up some work here and there.

drew barrymore might not be the greatest actor but i liked her in guncrazy and the wedding singer and ever after.

i liked what she did with the charlies angels movies

but her best work, i still think were the little tiny shorts that she did with her then-husband mr tom green of canada.

drew and tom were doing a lot of home videos. not the pam and tommy type but the real-deal ones where theyd get drunk or stay up all night and keep it real while staring into the camera and telling it like it is.

drew in one of them said how when she walks into a room everyone stops talking and it bums her out.

it makes you think, what sort of parties are you going to baby? let me throw you a party where even when the singer from Eve 6 threatens to get naked nobody notices.

poor drew. word is that her latest beau the scraggly haired drummer of the strokes is no longer hers. shes tried so many different men, why cant she keep one? has she gone black? i dont think so. maybe she should. maybe she should go blogger.

bloggers do it three times a day.

well happy birthday drew barrymore. movie star with whom without i would never have met the daisy princess and therefore probably wouldnt have had you and you and you as readers.

thirtieth birthdays can be a bitch so if you want to do something fun i hear theres a swinging party at the henry fonda tonight.

sign a petition to have the president investigate gannon/guckert + dr gene scott, dead + martini republic

xxxx annika xxxxx: So, what do you think about the Pres smoking Wead?

dumbtp: didnt we know Bush’s past?

xxxx annika xxxxx: Haha, i wonder if he inhaled

dumbtp: i think hed admit that he inhaled lots of things

xxxx annika xxxxx: Doh!

dumbtp: which would make weed not so huge

xxxx annika xxxxx: Well the tapes are pretty ambiguous about cocaine
xxxx annika xxxxx: Of course, JFK was rumored to have done lots of shit in the White House

dumbtp: of course

xxxx annika xxxxx: But then he had that back pain going on

dumbtp: i have two things to say about the weed

xxxx annika xxxxx: yes?

dumbtp: one: if you do drugs and you see that even with them in your past you can become President of the USA, quit pretending that theyre so bad for “kids”

two, the Republicans are either geniuses at dodging scandals, and/or the myth of a liberal press is just that

xxxx annika xxxxx: That’s exactly what i have been saying about weed
xxxx annika xxxxx: that’s what is so stupid about this whole war on potsmokers
xxxx annika xxxxx: they keep telling kids how evil weed is and all the bad things that will happen to them if they try it
xxxx annika xxxxx: and then, theyre hangin out and some friend hands them a joint and nothing bad happens
xxxx annika xxxxx: and they think, what the fuck, it was all a bunch of shit

dumbtp: and then one guy becomes a great president, and the other guy becomes a two-term president

xxxx annika xxxxx: exactly,
xxxx annika xxxxx: so then when some really bad drug, like meth comes along
xxxx annika xxxxx: how likely is that same kid to believe the warnings
xxxx annika xxxxx: in my opinion, all this scare tactic shit about weed is counter productive

dumbtp: and if we just legalized it and taxed it, we’d save social securty, balance the budget, fix heath care, and give the kids a decent edjumacation

xxxx annika xxxxx: because it weakens the necessary warnings against using the bad shit

dumbtp: that too

xxxx annika xxxxx: exactly

dumbtp: have you been to eastern europe?

xxxx annika xxxxx: Yes, i loved it

dumbtp: all my friends moved to prauge after college except me
dumbtp: im such a loser

xxxx annika xxxxx: i would love to be an expatriate, living in Bulgaria or Czech Republic
xxxx annika xxxxx: Prague is the second most beautiful city in the world

dumbtp: thats what everyone says

xxxx annika xxxxx: beautiful people too

dumbtp: so you agree that paris is #1

xxxx annika xxxxx: very romantic, which was a surprise to me
xxxx annika xxxxx: oh, no, San Francisco is!!!

dumbtp: ahahahaha. lil paris

xxxx annika xxxxx: Paris maybe number three

dumbtp: why do the conservatives try to make france out to be their enemy?

xxxx annika xxxxx: It’s fun to bash on France because they’re easy targets
xxxx annika xxxxx: That’s why i do it, but i’ll be honest with you
xxxx annika xxxxx: In Gulf War I, the French contribution was significant
xxxx annika xxxxx: they sent a whole division, along with ships and planes, and performed well, as i understand
xxxx annika xxxxx: Of course they got their ass kicked by the Germans in WWII, but come on
xxxx annika xxxxx: that was the Germans, at the height of their power.
xxxx annika xxxxx: using tactics no one had ever seen before
xxxx annika xxxxx: And in WWI, the French held the Central Powers off for four years, so they’re not total surrender monkeys
xxxx annika xxxxx: but i thought that Parisians were as haughty as advertised, when i was there

dumbtp: the way dubya sold this last war in iraq, can you blame the french for not being into it? harldy any one joined us.

xxxx annika xxxxx: Well, two things about that
xxxx annika xxxxx: Its not in Europe’s interest to join us
xxxx annika xxxxx: And also, we didn’t need them
xxxx annika xxxxx: Europe looks upon the use of military power a lot differently than we do
xxxx annika xxxxx: For them, military power was the source of lots of trouble, and they’ve happily done away with it through integration, and the EU
xxxx annika xxxxx: But they forget that the unity of the EU was made possible because of the Cold War
xxxx annika xxxxx: and the fact that the United States had their back for fifty years
xxxx annika xxxxx: so they had the luxury of negotiating away their differences, and then believing that negotiation was superior to the big stick approach
xxxx annika xxxxx: but it’s not
xxxx annika xxxxx: they just forgot that it was not they who had the big stick, it was us, and the Soviets

dumbtp: theres two parts to the big stick though
dumbtp: theres the talk softly part
dumbtp: and the stick

xxxx annika xxxxx: Yes, the carrot

dumbtp: “youre either with us, or youre against us” is not talking softly
dumbtp: particularily in the wake of 9/11
dumbtp: when you dont have to say things like that

xxxx annika xxxxx: No it is not, nor is the recent rhetoric regarding Iran and Syria
xxxx annika xxxxx: Especially when we’re not in much of a position to start a third front, but whatareyagonnado?

dumbtp: so what parts of this administration are you in agreement with?

xxxx annika xxxxx: foreign policywise, i’m pretty much in total agreement
xxxx annika xxxxx: even down to troop levels in Iraq, which puts me really out there
xxxx annika xxxxx: But domestically, i’m not too happy

dumbtp: so we should be in the business of nation building in your opinion?

xxxx annika xxxxx: yes, i do
xxxx annika xxxxx: funny huh

dumbtp: no, at least youre honest
dumbtp: is africa next?

xxxx annika xxxxx: Africa is a big challenge
xxxx annika xxxxx: Did you hear that they found some new fossils in east Africa that date back to 200,000 years ago?

dumbtp: no

xxxx annika xxxxx: Yes that’s 50,000 years older than the previous estimate

dumbtp: wow

xxxx annika xxxxx: Homo Sapiens, not some earlier species
xxxx annika xxxxx: So Africa is where it all began, and we should pay
more attention to it, i think

dumbtp: and that people are being slaughtered?

xxxx annika xxxxx: Yes, its terrible
xxxx annika xxxxx: i’m not an expert on that part of the world, i wish i knew what could be done about it, then i would run for president, or UN secretary or something

dumbtp: thats not our jobs
dumbtp: our jobs are to keep people in check
dumbtp: as bloggers, that is
dumbtp: so if this administration says that we went to iraq for wmd
dumbtp: and then changes it to say that we’re there for humanitarian reasons
dumbtp: and Freedom
dumbtp: then we need to say, cool, africa needs some freedom

xxxx annika xxxxx: Okay, that’s my biggest criticism of Bush, actually
xxxx annika xxxxx: his maddening inarticulateness (is that a word?)

dumbtp: dont ask me, i had to take 2.5 years of junior college

xxxx annika xxxxx: We did not go to Iraq for wmd
xxxx annika xxxxx: lol
xxxx annika xxxxx: but Bush, and his administration did such a horrible job of articulating the argument for war
xxxx annika xxxxx: that they let it evolve into an argument about wmd, and not the real reasons
xxxx annika xxxxx: which are the doctrine of pre-emption, and the neocon dream of installing democracies for national security reasons
xxxx annika xxxxx: wmd was just an excuse to try to get the UN to go along with us
xxxx annika xxxxx: which they never were going to anyway, and so it was a bad move to focus on wmd… as they existed at the time
xxxx annika xxxxx: the focus should have been on wmd as they mightexist in the future, with Saddam Hussein still in power and after the UN inspectors had left… that was the danger

dumbtp: how is that dangerous enough to go to war though?

xxxx annika xxxxx: that’s certainly a legitimate criticism

dumbtp: didnt we have a score to settle with some al queda motherfuckers?

xxxx annika xxxxx: is pre-emption a good strategy?

dumbtp: no, not really

xxxx annika xxxxx: that was a rhetorical question, lol

dumbtp: ahahaah
dumbtp: sorry, im slow

xxxx annika xxxxx: no really, the related question, is one Kerry brought up in the debates, which i thought he could have won on, if he had not shot himself in the foot with his 87 billion comment
xxxx annika xxxxx: the question being, why aren

dumbtp: poor john

xxxx annika xxxxx: aren’t we going after Al Qaeda first?
xxxx annika xxxxx: i see the wisdom in the president’s plan, but hell, i don’t know how it’s going to play out
xxxx annika xxxxx: i don’t know if it will ultimately be right
xxxx annika xxxxx: i’m hopeful though, and i think things are beginning to look up

dumbtp: i hope youre right

xxxx annika xxxxx: for years, the US was criticized for propping up dictators to further our own national interest
xxxx annika xxxxx: esp. in Central and South America
xxxx annika xxxxx: and these dictators were bad men, but they were our bad men
xxxx annika xxxxx: the “neocon” way is totally different
xxxx annika xxxxx: now the US is not propping up friendly dictators, instead we try to bring friendly democracies to the places we need them
xxxx annika xxxxx: i think that’s a step in the right direction, as long as we’re messing in other people’s business, it’s better that we’re no longer putting in dictators
xxxx annika xxxxx: end of rant

dumbtp: now that youre single, will you put your pic on your blog?

xxxx annika xxxxx: i used to throw my pics all over the place, when i first started
xxxx annika xxxxx: i even had my pic on my banner
xxxx annika xxxxx: and in my photo album

dumbtp: i think i remember that

xxxx annika xxxxx: no, really?

dumbtp: cute petite blonde?
dumbtp: very fair

xxxx annika xxxxx: You’re like such a blog idol of mine, i can’t believe you knew i existed

dumbtp: ahahahaha

xxxx annika xxxxx: if i saw you in a bar, i’d be too starstruck to approach you
xxxx annika xxxxx: i’d be like, “You know who that is, that’s Tony Pierce”

dumbtp: youre not put off by my slams on the right?

xxxx annika xxxxx: i love your slams on the right, actually

dumbtp: i told you you were smart

xxxx annika xxxxx: cause, you do it intelligently

dumbtp: why thank you

xxxx annika xxxxx: even if i disagree, its still a blast to read
xxxx annika xxxxx: you know what i loved the best about the busblog, that really made me a lifelong fan, tho?

dumbtp: do tell
dumbtp: my nude galleries?

xxxx annika xxxxx: no really, im serious, this is not just ass-kissing
xxxx annika xxxxx: lol
xxxx annika xxxxx: No, the way you were so cool about the Wil Wheaton thing
xxxx annika xxxxx: i was very very impressed with that

dumbtp: well, im not usually a jealous man
dumbtp: its not a feeling i like
dumbtp: and all of that was based on my jealousy over something as lame as blog poularity
dumbtp: he was the one who was cool about all of that

xxxx annika xxxxx: i admire a person who is introspective and honest with themself

dumbtp: youre very kind

xxxx annika xxxxx: Have you ever corresponded with Wil Wheaton other than that
xxxx annika xxxxx: i could see you two hanging out

dumbtp: yes we had a lovely lunch a few months back

xxxx annika xxxxx: no way

dumbtp: kat from dirtyfez was there too

xxxx annika xxxxx: i would talk about Star Trek the whole time
xxxx annika xxxxx: he’d hate me

dumbtp: i dont think so
dumbtp: here’s the post i wrote about meeting them
dumbtp: he seemed really open to talk about anything

xxxx annika xxxxx: Dang, now i look like i don’t read your blog
xxxx annika xxxxx: i hate that

dumbtp: i write so much, theres no way anyone can keep up
dumbtp: some people have stopped trying
dumbtp: youre a trekkie?

xxxx annika xxxxx: i hate it when another blogger lets me think that they don’t hang on every word i write
xxxx annika xxxxx: Yah, a little
xxxx annika xxxxx: im not an expert like BigHominid, who posted seventy trivia questions on his blog, of which i got like 3 correct
xxxx annika xxxxx: but i have TNG seasons one and two on DVD, and i have been to a convention

dumbtp: did you dress up?

xxxx annika xxxxx: no comment

dumbtp: ahahahaha
dumbtp: i may be the only one who hasnt seen even one episode of TNG

xxxx annika xxxxx: Oh my my

dumbtp: and here i thought i was so in touch with american culture

xxxx annika xxxxx: Well, it’s an acquired taste

dumbtp: ok we have 9 minutes before tip off
dumbtp: poetry
dumbtp: who are your faves?

xxxx annika xxxxx: Edna
xxxx annika xxxxx: WCW
xxxx annika xxxxx: i like Gary Snyder lately

dumbtp: interesting

xxxx annika xxxxx: ee cummings

dumbtp: are you kidding me
dumbtp: what about bukowski?

xxxx annika xxxxx: frank ohara, and ferlinghetti
xxxx annika xxxxx: bukowski was a genius

dumbtp: you little tease

xxxx annika xxxxx: i know you like him
xxxx annika xxxxx: i’ve read his stories more, tho
xxxx annika xxxxx: not as familiar w/ his poetry

dumbtp: his poems are so amazing
dumbtp: because its like hes not even trying
dumbtp: idiot savantism

xxxx annika xxxxx: i posted one on a recent wednesday

dumbtp: “oh i think i will drink a beer, wipe my ass and knock out three poems tonight cuz im too hungover to write a proper story.”

xxxx annika xxxxx: You are the next bukowski, you know it
xxxx annika xxxxx: only bigger

dumbtp: not with a virgin girlfriend im not!

xxxx annika xxxxx: haha

dumbtp: i think part of his myth was his reckless drinking, im so sober in comparison

xxxx annika xxxxx: Truly, but you have equal talent

dumbtp: im applying for grad school, so maybe they can help me believe that

xxxx annika xxxxx: i’ll be a reference, lol

xxxx annika xxxxx: you know the best book on la?

dumbtp: please tell!

xxxx annika xxxxx: the day of the locust,

xxxx annika xxxxx: hands down
dumbtp: people say that!
dumbtp: i have never read it!!!
xxxx annika xxxxx: read it now
xxxx annika xxxxx: its short
xxxx annika xxxxx: okay, end on a good note sweetie, it’s 5:00

dumbtp: this was such a joy for me
dumbtp: thank you so much for doing this
dumbtp: im glad you werent defensive
dumbtp: and trusted me

xxxx annika xxxxx: Thank you , the joy was all mine

dumbtp: im glad youre finally being recognized on the blogosphere
dumbtp: im glad it happened with your pics down
dumbtp: this way we both know it was for who you are
dumbtp: not what you look like

xxxx annika xxxxx: haha, me too, esp the nekkid ones
xxxx annika xxxxx: just kiddin

dumbtp: kings or lakers?

xxxx annika xxxxx: lakers, totally

<3 annika <3