handing out Vote For Parks signs as hes running for mayor of LA.

little does the former chief of police know, but wilshire and western, deep in the heart of koreatown, is populated largely with spanish-speaking folk who might not all be, ahem, registered to vote.

and the rest of them are koreans who arent all that in love with african americans, especially african american former police chiefs who werent all that loveable in the first place.

i realize the chief wanted to be surrounded by large groups of prospective voters sympathetic to his cause he should have moseyed down to the miracle mile. his problem is his voter base, fellow african americans, are in the pocket of mayor hahn, whose father gave more to LA african americans than even mayor tom bradley.

but because he chose a metro stop/bus stop filled with minorites that either didnt speak english or could not and/or would not vote, he was stuck in a conversation with me

his worst enemy

who had nothing to do since i had to wait for the bus.

parks: hi, are you planning on voting for mayor next tuesday?

me: what difference will it make who wins, LA is far too big to manage.

parks: cynicism this early in the morning? obviously i disagree with your stance.

me: dude, you people cant even get the busses to run properly, the subway to go places that matter, or even those escalators to work for a full week.

parks: how would you like the metro to improve?

me: lets start at the escalators and elevators. get new ones. i have used this station every day for four years. the money the city pays to mitsubishi to repair these peices alone can probably pay for new escalators and elevators at every station. and when you get new ones, get Otis ones, not mitsubishi.

parks: are you dissatisfied with the metro?

me: yes, look at all these rapids. three at a time. why are they rolling three in clumps? why arent they spread out every 4-5 minutes? you’ll get three in a pack ever 6-7 minutes. that’s not convienent to anyone. stagger them. old people ride these things. do you want old ladies standing out in the “safe” streets of LA waiting for a bus? spread them out and get more local busses. the rapids are fine, but we dont need as many of them, we need far more local busses.

parks: those are all good points.

me: sure they are, which is why nothing will ever happen. no one listens to the poor unless its an election year.

parks: have you considered entering government yourself?

me: of course not. you think i want to be in a shirt and tie taking crap by some cynical busrider on a wednesday morning about dumb crap like metro escalators?

parks: but you would be helping your neighbors and your community.

me: my community are the kids of isla vista. and if i ever get the chance to return there then i will run for mayor of that town and i wont involve myself in dumb programs like DARE or SANE i would actually work on ways to legalize things that should be legal and fix things that shouldnt break twice a week. good luck on your race but mayor hahn hasnt screwed up. you should support him, not try to bash him because you want his job.

and then i got on the bus

dan jeffers + steph + casey + today in the busblog

they swear she has just one baby in there but some are speculating that she has much more like:

the upcoming sopranos scripts
the holy grail
the missing wmd

all my lost blogger posts.

everyone loves bonnie, and everyone loves charlie too, but people love bonnie more.

theyre both ridiculously smart people with nothing better to do than smile a bunch, drink, and show the world how it’s done.

bonnie is so big just to demonstrate how big a lil girl can get before she gives the world a kool kid.

say yr prayers america cuz everyone says that today is probably the day that we all get a 2005 Hornberger.

which is why it hasnt rained here in days.

me, i hope they name the little dickens Tybie.

or Malkovich

or Sly

or Nexie.

funny that none of our friends have named their kids Barbara.

shiras pics of bonnie + charlie and bonnie’s buzznet snaps + dearly beloved

again. but its cool. i think. i said baby i realize you havent gotten to kiss anyone for twenty three years other than your first boyfriend and me and therefore if you ever find yourself at a party or a masquerade ball or a pie eating contest and some dude wants to kiss you and you wanna kiss him back, don’t let me get in your way, kiss him. enjoy it. dont think about it, do it. and she was all whaat?

and i said just cuz youre my girlfriend dont think that you should be limited in any way, it should be a good thing not a bad thing on any level. a black man understands the importance of feedom so why would he bind someone he cares about in any way. and again she was like what on earth are you talking about you insane creature.

then she was all are you saying that you want to kiss other girls? and i was all no no no and its true i wasnt. i was just saying hey if the cork is off the bottle let the wine spill where it will. but that didnt sound really all that perfect either and she looked at me funny and it wasnt really a fight but it was the first time that she seriously doubted my ability to think like a proper human.

humans of course being the ones who enjoy limits and boundaries and excess of fun. excess of calories, fine. excess of gas guzzling things, a-ok. excess of debit, no prob. but happiness, joy, laughter? you crazy. so we went to the beverly center and stood in line at the coffee bean and perhaps i should just make the point that, well, perhaps these are several points, the beverly center has hot chicks everywhere and the coffee bean attracts those hot chicks and because its the beverly center people dress pretty damn good and im a visual animal so i looked at my girl and poked at her and got a little too close to her so as to disrupt her anxiety about pda etc and soon i only saw the only girl that mattered which wasnt hard cuz shes hot and looked cute in her low top chucks.

shes so little you can put her in your pocket but that doesnt mean that she likes being picked up. we went to the pet store which is right there at the main entrance of the beverly center and right in the front are the puppies and who doesnt like puppies so we looked at the damn puppies and some puppies were sleepin and some were trying to hump each other and some were digging at imaginary bones and some were just staring out with wet hair from where one puppy peed on his head when he wasnt lookin.

as we left we saw a nice young mexican couple exiting the store and taking their little white poofball of a puppy out of its box.

and yes i was a little buzzed from a quick swig this brotha passed me outside the ladies room, but it struck me odd that someone put a puppy inside a box in order to make the transaction official.

when we made it to chipotle the man said hello how may i help you and i said first i want to say that we’re very happy to be at chipotle today. and later she said your honesty is freaking out the help. then we drove home and watched american idol and i dont know whats wrong with simon because both those rocker dudes sucked.

raymi + meets a fan + chokey chicken

march 1, 2004

talk to me. tell me your name. i just watched american idol. i wish i was a neilson family. i watched the first two american idol episodes and none after that and today they had the “untalented” show and it was awesome.

i saw my man william hung today and i was cheering along. if he sang at the end of every show id watch it every week.

people seriously need to hire me to tell them these things.

now im watching forever eden which sorta looks like paradise hotel which i loved. we really should thank the japanese for giving us these bizzare reality shows.

thank you japanese people.

ive noticed that im nicer after watching that jesus movie.

i talked on the phone to the 90 year old lady upstairs.

i did pass a legless man in a wheelchair who had fallen asleep in the rain in his chair out on the sidewalk.

didnt really know how to feel about that.

it was in front of a huge church that people dont think is a church but i dont think they pay taxes, so i’ll call them a church. and they have people walking around that church all the time. churchmembers. but it is a pretty busy sidewalk but surely theyd roll the man inside.

it was odd.

theres hospitals all around that church but still.

hollywood has its darkside my friends.

its not all bikini girls palmtrees and coke parties.

sometimes it rains

and youre legless

and youve fallen asleep.

it was dark out there. it coulda been anything. man. woman. other.

im not proud. and that jesus movie did make me feel bad at least, i guess thats a step in the right direction.

i suppose one day i will stop and help

i think it was a guy.

had a nice black cowboy hat on.

no feet.

little stumps sticking out of the pant legs at the knee.

so dark i nearly bumped into it because i thought it was an abandonded cart of some sort.

but it was a wheelchair with a tall black hook coming out of the top.

as to hold an iv at home?

to hold a hat?

i thought if i was that dude i might just end it all out there on sunset blvd drunk

there was an empty bottle of booze behind him a good twenty paces.

house brand vodka it looked.

same stretch of sunset you see at the end of “adaptation.” when the flowers time lapse

id buy a william hung dvd if he’d autograph it for me.

just a girl + the grey havens + my sexy wifey moxie

how to blog the greatest self published book about blogging that ive ever written has been a smashing success, thanks to you and you and you and you.

you, however, do not have a signed copy.

you, then, sadly only have one more day to get one at the super low crazy low discounted rate of $24 (shipping included – if you live in the USA).

slightly higher if you live outside of the usa.

you can get your copy by emailing me at howtoblog@tonypierce.com and i will send you back a paypal invoice.

as discussed on here many many times, How To Blog doesnt actually teach you how to blog. it is basically a collection of blog posts that first appeared on the busblog over the last two years. they’re real life examples of how i’ve been blogging two to three times a day, year after year after year.

if you want to learn how to blog, perhaps you should go to the other t. pierce on the blogosphere who decided today that it was a good idea to use the t. pierce name to market his How To Blog book + dvd package for the low low price of $347.

why T. L. Pakii Pierce doesn’t have his products out as Pakii Pierce (like he has on his gmail address) or as T. L. Pakii or even as Thomas Pierce is a mystery because anyone named T. Pierce who Googled “pierce how to blog” since June would have certainly seen not only my original post, but also most recently my book

both named “how to blog.”

the post, how to blog, is also in the running for best article about blogging for the 2005 Bloggies

im sure i just flew under mr. pierce’s radar when he was researching his information, title, and content.

i am also fascinated by people who write books on blogging, who don’t update their own blog regularily and/or those who have only been blogging a few months.

i wish i had such courage.

anyway, the autographed versions of How To Blog will end as of tomorrow. after that all of the links will go to the CafePress site who will ship out non-signed copies of the book.

i will be making an appearence at SXSW where i will be selling a limited amount of books for those who attend the Blogging While Black panel that i will be speaking at, but the price at SXSW will be ridiculously high because i plan on doing lots of drinking and theres nothing better than cold beer purchased from the profits of your dumb book.

random frost + vortexia + welchie + bg5000

i had pretty low expectations for chris rock hosting the oscars this year, but he was totally perfect.

much sharper and courageous than i expected him to be.

when chris rock is on a roll theres no one better right now.

heres the parts of his monologue that went after the president. a tough trick considering how sensitive republicans can get when you criticize dear leader, and double-tough considering how skittish democrats are to attack publicly.

rock broke it down, laid it out, and delivered it beautifully

without hate, without anger, with just classic comedy fundamentals.

A lot of people like to bash Bush. I’m not gonna bash Bush here tonight. I saw ‘Fahrenheit 9/11’, I think Bush is a genius. I thought Bush did some things this year nobody in this room could do. Nobody in this room could pull off.

Bush basically reapplied for his job this year. Now can you imagine applying for a job, and while you’re applying for that job, there is a movie in every theater in the country that shows how much you suck at that job?” (Laughter)

I’d be hard to get hired wouldn’t it?

Now I watched Fahrenheit, I learned some stuff man. Bush did some things you could never get away with at your job, man. Never, ever, ever.

You know, when Bush got into office he had a surplus of money. Now there’s like a $70 trillion dollar deficit. Now, just imagine you worked at the Gap.(Laughter)

You’re closing out your register, and there’s $70 trillion dollars short. (Laughter)

The average person would get in trouble for something like that, right? (Laughter) Not Bush, no. (Laughter-Applause)

Then he started a war, that’s cool, support the troops, he started a war. Now just imagine you worked at the Gap.(Laughter)

You’re $70 trillion behind on your register, and then you start a war with the Banana Republic…(Laughter) ’cause you say they got toxic tank-tops over there.(Laughter)

You have the war. People are dying. A thousand Gap employees dead, that’s right, bleeding all over the khakis.(Laughter)

You finally take over Banana Republic and you find out, they never made tank-tops in the first place.(Laughter-Applause)

video of the entire monologue + cheese and crackers oscar roundup + calvin and hobbes archive

karisas coming over to watch
the oscars with me

i hope they all lose

know that i was interested in going to the anaheim show last night until the last minute, so all they were able to get me was one ticket to the sold out gig.

the lovely swedish virgin who lives near anaheim drove up to pick me up so we could drive back down there and go to the show, then she would drive me back up here and then drive back home in the wee hours. thats a great girl.

so i called the house of blues box office before she got to my hollywood hills batcave and they confirmed that i was getting one ticket only. they also told me that yes, there were no more tickets for sale.

so we drove to the surreal and embarrassing downtown disney and she told me that she had a disney year round pass a few years ago and i was all youre kidding me and she said no i love disneyland. shutup.

we parked and i went to the atm and took out $60 for the ticket i was going to have to try to buy off someone and then i went to the box office to get my ticket and the sweet girl hung back and waited for me as i tried to beg one last time from the dudes in the box office. they talked about it and decided that no, there were no more tickets.

i got my one ticket, turned around to see if anyone was selling any tickets and there was my hot little girlfriend jumping up and down telling me that some dude saw her there for the two full minutes that i was away from her and handed her a free ticket.

amazing.

i guess the magic kingdom isnt so bad after all, i told her. she said, see, and we strolled in.

awesome show. full of life and beautiful music. i think now after 12 years im finally not suprised that his mellow songs are actually mellow.

and as soon as i became comfortable with that he doubletimed “i will dare” after the second verse and turned it into pure punk rock and there was that magic again.

someone later loudly requested “bastards of young” to which paul said, “that song belongs to the replacements, i will never ever ever ever play that without tommy.”

afterwards we went to the pantry, ate steak and eggs, and then steamed up her windows for an hour out front of my house cuz we both know if she steps foot inside she’ll never leave.

mr westerberg and his only friends played thirty songs last night

1. Merry Go Round
2. Someone take the wheel
3. Live forever
4. Makin’ me Go
5. Let the Bad Times Roll
6. As Far As I know
7. Battleship Chains
8. Kiss me on the Bus
9. Final Hurrah
10. AAA
11. Rebel Rebel
12. Swinging Party
13. Knockin on Mine
14. Folk Star
15. Mr. Rabbit
16. Psychopharmacolgy
17. Born For Me
18. High Time
19. Little Mascara
20.Valentine
21. Crackel and Drag
22. If only you were lonely
23. Lookin Up in Heaven
24. What a Day for a night
25. Love untold
26. I think I love you
27. I will dare
28. IOU
29. MPLS ( long jam version)
30. Alex Chilton

paul’s page + splinky + jim lowney

hes doing this because hes afraid he will be shot by the white house

this is answering the question, “why is james dale guckert appearing on every tv, radio, internet interview show despite being clearly americas first real man whore since the guy who tattooed that company’s name on his fore head.”

and now jeff gannon has a blog.

if i was him id be scurred.

it must suck, so to speak, to have dirt on the current administration so good that they would go out that far on a limb to sneak a gay male hooker into the white house during wartime

and now have it explode all over their faces, prematurely.

but what could that dirt be? it couldnt be worse than going to war over wmds that are never found, because there was never any wmdgate

seems like the only thing a president can get impeached about nowadays is sex.

im sorry, about lying about sex.

does guckert have information about a president lying about sex?

of course not.

how on earth could a gay male prostitute have any information about anything like that?

either way, guckert is trying to stay as in the public eye as he possibly can.

for some reason.

writing such humorous lines like “So feared by the Left it had to take me down.” as if the Left made Talon News delete all of his articles.

makes you wonder if every flower blooms its brightest and craziest right before theyre about to die.

my question is what is it about the conservative cause that would inspire their base to write things, albeit it anonymously, like this, as seen in the comments of matt welch‘s fine warblog:

This is a total and complete non-story and I can’t believe anyone is still writing about it. (Oddly, what has given it legs is probably the gay angle which is once removed from what’s already a non-story).

Who cares what a few questions are in a press conference, especially as long as they are all on record and we can judge them. (I often don’t like how the press asks questions, but there’s not much you can do about that.) In truth, the President isn’t required to take any questions from the press, and is also allowed to only talk to people he likes. If he did this, he could be (properly) attacked and judged for it, but that’s about it. But, in fact, he and his spokespeople are regularly questioned about everything (and, just as regularly, dodge questions they don’t like) so the Gannon story adds nothing to anything.

all its gonna do is make some jackhole like me write:

fine, leave the gay part out.

a male hooker with a fake name working for a fake news agency pretending to be a reporter was caught softballing questions to the president and the press secretary.

when they were caught the fake news agency took down their entire site.

the owner of the fake news agency, and the employer of the male prostitute fake reporter? owner of gopusa.com.

in light of revelations that the gop-led administration has paid off at least six reporters recently for pro-gop stories, how on god’s green earth is this flaming mole being snuck in by the white house *not* a story?

and indeed, how is it “totally and complete” a non-story

* more Republican trickery and manipulation in the press is not a story?

* a security breach at the hands of the secret service isnt a story?

* a hooker working in the white house is not a story?

* a hooker working for a right-wing fake news agency isnt a story?

* the white house giving special preferrential treatment to a hooker isnt a story?

* a fledgling right-wing news agency that had been around for two days is given access that only a select few isnt a story?

* an alleged news agency whose ace reporter is discovered to be writing under a fake name perhaps to cover up the fact that hes a male escort deletes all of his reports and subsequently their entire site out of shame is not a story?

you are either a liar or a fool, sir. no wonder you don’t leave a real email address, mr. guckert.

jay rosen on guckert + jeffgannon.com + one gay date at a time

tonight 2/25
TSAR – EL CID 10pm
hot hot heat, roxy
veruca salt, viper room
.38 special, the canyon
master p, vault 350
kenny wayne shepherd, house of blues

saturday 2/26
white out, spaceland
duran duran, staples
krs-one, fais do-do
stan ridgeway, largo
the residents, cerritos center
the nip drivers, anarchy library
pretty boy floyd, whisky
john hammond, mccabes
bettie serveert + the dirty bops, troubador
biblical proof of ufos, mr t’s bowl
the skashank redemption, the roxy
the gun and doll show, the cat club

sunday 2/27
mikey dread, vault 350

tues 3/1
love, spaceland
aaron carter + jordan knight, house of blues
suckerpunch, the cat club
matt costa, tangier
brides of destruction, key club

wed 3/2
dashboard confessional, house of blues
jesus makes the shotgun sound + bi-polar bear, the smell

thurs 3/3
sage francis, henry fonda
jason falkner, spaceland
jonny lang, troubador
pillow of wrongness, the gig
nice jewish girl gone bad, tangier

ev’s new project + expecting rain + aaron clemens