when everything was beautiful and you could meet a cute blonde babe at a blogger mixer and
you could get her number and she let you drive her home in her porche
but she’d say my place is messy, how about yours
and you take her to your crib and youd think im the luckiest man in the world
and you knew she was maybe a republican, but nothing serious because those times were innocent
and she’d say i’ll have a drink with you but im not sleeping with you and youd wink back and say uh huh
and youd slip into something more comfortable (sweat pants and a robe) and she’d say why are you lubing up, i said we werent sleeping together
and youd say oh im 97 years old, this is for my arratica.
and shed say whats arratica
youd say i get it whenever a smokin hot babe who i only knew from stage and screen is somehow in my lair but shes gonna wanna be the little spoon
and because im a gentleman ive just gotta close my eyes and think about pete rose all night.
remember when there were things about pete rose that you could think about other than him selling his autograph in vegas malls
wearing a weird Donald Trump hat but instead of lets make america dumb again it says
hit king
and soon shes asleep and you think is she drunk? how is she asleep? how does a girl fall asleep in a strange mans bed that quickly
a strange man fully lubed with his arratica grease on his personage
christmas lights twinkling, lou reed serenading
disco ball rotating
smoke machine
machining
and