or something

aham23: 5 or 3? which way did you go man?

those were girls clothes. i bought a churro, some bootleg dvds, a sparkley belt for the cougar, and a bike rack for my trunk.

adrienne: list me off three things in this world you are sure of.

my mother loves me, there is a God, the busblog will never end.

Ciavarro: Will I or won’t I pass out during the ceremony on September 6?

if i knew for certain that you would, i would consider making the hike up there. but i doubt it. italian men might be sensitive, but making the most important decision of your (schween’s) life is nothing to pass out over.

Sharp (Azreal Darkskies): What comic books did you grow up reading? Are you as excited for Dark Knight as I am?

Mad, Cracked, and Crazy – none of the superhero ones. I was the superhero, i didnt need comics. Jazzed about the Dark Knight? No. Christian Bale isnt my type of Batman. I didn’t mind the last one Batman Begins or whatever, but Michael Keaton was troubled and to me those are the best comic book heroes. Bale is too much a pretty boy. A poor man’s Tom Cruise.

xtx: Would you make lust to a Real Doll? (don’t lie….)

I’ve had enough real women who act like the Real Doll that i can honestly say no. I wouldnt mind having one lounging around the house to freak out guests, but i would not have relations with her.

tina: when weed doesnt work, f or be f’ed?

i can honestly say i have no f’ing idea what on earth you are talking about.

Steven Allen Adams: Should Jesse Jackson be honest and admit what we already know: that he’s jealous of Barack Obama?

it would be beautiful since many people didnt like Jesse even before the incident, and it would add a new dimension to his personality that some might not have seen: humility.

lily: how’s it like living in LA? do you encounter folks like masuimi max or henry rollins?

i love LA with all my heart. its not for everyone. but if you like running into stars then this is pretty much the only place that i can imagine you can do it and not even realize it. never heard of masuimi, but i just Google Imaged her ass and wowza. i had actually interviewed Rollins many many moons ago and drove him around Hollywood before he opened for Gwar. Great guy. super intense. very smart. but yes, if you live in hollywood or santa monica or malibu you will see stars all the time. (theyre just like us)

John: Is hell eternal?

if Heaven is, then Hell has to be. which is why i try to be as good as i can be. because id rather have eternal Paradise instead of eternal Damnation. a bad day on Earth is bad enough, let alone a bad year. i dont wanna know what eternal bad is all about.

pitt: wtf is with the jays and no offense? and this bs about firing our beer vendor for selling to a guy 3 years past the age of majority? did you know perry farrell is a play on the word “peripheral”?

canada has an odd relationship with booze. even more odd than we have in the states. you should be able to buy anywhere. and if you sell to someone OVER the age you should not be f’ed with. its too subjective to say that “oh he looked under 25”. and no i didnt know that about perry which means you win the prize. send me your address and i will have it in the mail to you shortly.

Krista: best question? Name your dream president and vice president. (worst question ever)

busblog/oceanaria 2016

4rilla: Thoughts on the Harden/Gaudin deal? How do you feel about the winning division of the All Star game having home field in the World Series? I know you like Shep and Kobe, have you seen this?

Harden might be injury prone. i dont care. its the thought that counts. and the Cubs are doing all the right things. im not sure why they didnt get CC instead but whatevs. we got the second best dude out there which is a ton better than what StL got (nada). i do like Shep, but not Kobe. im Team Shaq. for lyfe. and im not crazy about that poster. looks like he put the obama filter on it.

top photo of my backyard via cowicide, bottom photo of my vp by oceanaria

this week: special prize for the person with the best question

why yes i did. sam sent it out last week. i was gonna let it slide but i kept getting emails about it, so heres the part in his email where he listed off the two main journalists who are now bloggers on Top of the Ticket, and then me, then my boss, then the person who sells ads for the blog.

Here are a number of ways that your colleagues are advancing our company today:

Top of the Ticket, LA Times’ political blog, is now the 129 top-ranked blog in the world, and the third highest-ranked newspaper politics blog in the country, behind only The New York Time’s Caucus and Washington Post’s Trail, both of which are in the top 100. Top of the Ticket received 2.63 million page views in May alone. Even better, the LA Times ad team is now successfully selling ads tied to the Ticket as a worldwide Top 150 blog. Key Players: Andrew Malcolm, Don Frederick, Tony Pierce, Meredith Artley, Juliana Jaoudi

you can read the whole thing on the LA Times Pressman’s blog written by Ed Padgett who i hope to meet one of these days.

Speaking of The Ticket, Andy Malcolm has a pretty interesting interview with former Christian Coalition executive director Ralph Reed who had this to say about John McCain:

TOTT: What most surprised you about the outcome of the Republican primaries?

Reed: John McCain winning the nomination after essentially running out of money and laying off most of his staff in the summer of 2007 was amazing. His win in New Hampshire was a real Lazarus moment.

Lazarus? Wasn’t Lazarus brought back to life by Jesus? Is he saying that New Hampshire is Jesus? I’m so very confused. Or maybe that’s just a really miserable analogy.

Lazarus wasn’t sorta dead, or dying. He was dead! And had been dead for days! And Lazarus didn’t do anything to rise. It was the Son of God who fixed things. Simply by yelling. Rise, Lazarus! What on Earth does that have to do with McCain outlasting a Mormon hawk and a fundamentalist?

Anyways, Andy, Don, Meredith, Scott Martelle, and Diana Swartz deserve the credit for the Ticket’s great success. i just showed up at the right place at the right time. plus you gotta give props to all of them for actually trying some of the little tiny things that i suggested. you can have the best tips in the world but if the folks dont give em a shot theyre worthless.

one thing that has totally been rewarding about this job is that almost everyone will take suggestions and run with em. to me thats a huge part of professionalism and team work and two big reasons we will survive this terrible recession that is affecting lots of aspects of business and american life. the times is far more flexible and willing to change with the market forces than most people give it credit for being.

congratulations emmanuelle and matt on baby Izidora!

tres bien mes amis!

but since i cant tell you about it yet, enjoy this funny video titled “How Not To Use The Drive Through ATM”.

via Digg, of course

starring angelina jolie, morgan freeman, and james mcavoy

this film is the perfectionists dream. absolute marksmanship, specialists, teamwork, spiritual metaphysics that literally defy actualphysics.

its also the teen boy summer filmgoers dream. fast cars, guns and knives, explosions, fights, cussing, and angelina jolie angelina jolie and angelina jolie.

like in the photo above shes badder than shes ever been. shes more focused. all of her tattoos are on display and from the moment she hits the screen she is the dominant force to be reckoned with even if shes simply staring down the barrel of a gun.

but the star of the show is the director whose eastern euro name i cant even pronounce so why bother even write it down. for the sake or convenience we will call him bro. bro is a master of light and darkness, color and shadow, speed and slo mo. we are in his world and hes on acid. and like the bullets that can curve, its not an accident, its a desired act of english. its tiger woods backspin, its a ryan express moving fastball, its the sway of the hem of a hot girl in a perfect skirt.

good beginning, better middle, perfect ending.

wanted is everything i wanted from a fast paced highly stylized beautifully shot close your eyes and floor it summer action film created for adults who want to strap in and ride with it.

its so good i might even look up bros name in imdb.

the garage where i work is a fascinating sight. you see all sorts of cars, some that are loaned to our reviewers to write about, but most are from the wide spectrum of people who work here and some of the people who simply rent out a parking space.

of all the cars that intrigue me is the seemingly abandoned ’86 corvette that takes up a primo spot on the 4th floor.

my first day here i noticed it and every day since, because it sits there and collects dust. and soot. and dirt. and most recently… messages.

someone wrote “why” on the roof, and a comedian wrote “not”… for some reason

these people had an impromptu game of tic-tac-toe, which looks to be still in session, so i will check back on it later and update you as to who won

today i saw a citation on the windshield warning that it will be towed if it isnt moved or cleaned or something, but that was put on there a month ago, so i guess no one cares.

i do though. cuz i want it.

for ur ass

– a poetic response by Wonkette to a column in the LA Times makes the front page of the LA Times, which of course makes it back to Wonkette

– there are still 500 seats at laker games you can get for $10 each, despite the team raising the prices of tickets even though they lost the finals. miserably.

– meanwhile suzie is finding its hard to shake her ass past:

That interview for the dance instructor position went pretty well, that is until the guy asked me “did you ever dance at ….” I quickly responded “NO!” but I couldn’t help but feel I should’ve been honest. Are people even allowed to ask that?!?!? I would’ve liked to say, “yes, I was a stripper Sir” and then explain why I even bothered to try it….but the judgments “normal/mass” society automatically makes about a profession such as that, I honestly wasn’t prepared to deal /w. I suppose that was one of the main reasons I loved dancing; being a nice, somewhat inspirational girl in that hell hold. I just wish people would drop all their pre-conceived notions sometimes, but seeing as we’re bred that way I guess that would be almost impossible. *sigh*

– theres this blog post that just might make the front page of Digg (vote for it, yo) called 20 bloggers we’d like to see in bikinis. and you know, you might know one or two of them.

– omar sharif says f it in a beautiful and gorgeous way:

Earlier this year, the 76-year-old actor stopped defending himself against a civil suit by a valet he struck in the face outside a tony Beverly Hills steakhouse in 2005. Sharif, who had spent two years and tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees attempting to settle the case, concluded that he was, in the words of one of his lawyers, “being shaken down” based on his celebrity.

Others may have gritted their teeth and written a check. Sharif refused. He let his attorneys go and said he was representing himself. Then he did nothing. He wrote no motions and attended no depositions. He skipped the trial.

The result was a default judgment, including a bill for the plaintiff’s legal fees, of $445,000. A lopsided outcome, but perhaps not a satisfying one for the winner.

Sharif has no intention of paying a dime.

“His position is that the judgment is never going to be collected,” said his former lawyer, Martin D. Singer.

An Egyptian citizen, Sharif has no assets in the United States and nothing to lose by flouting the judgment, former and current attorneys for Sharif say. The unpaid civil award won’t prevent him from traveling to the U.S. or working in films in Egypt and Europe, as he often has in recent years.

– speaking of sharifs, oh i mean sheriffs, an assistant OC county sheriff testified against a former sheriff who allegedly doled out 86 badges to “friends” for the low low price of $1,000:

Haidl told federal agents that Carona’s goal was to sign up 1,000 reserves and collect a $1,000 donation for each badge in an effort to raise $1 million for his campaign war chest.

Once one of the former sheriff’s closest associates, Haidl also alleged that as an assistant sheriff he was promised a “get-out-of-jail-free card” and the power to arrest or “cut loose” any individuals he pleased.

– every time the pants writes its a good thing:

i am on a beer rampage. beer beer beer beer beer, beer beer. i never know what to say to myself anymore. i am less unhappy since i don’t work crazy morning hours anymore but i am more useless than ever and, at the moment, brokezilla the drunk. there is a good reason jolly roger is only supposed to be on tap during xmas, f’ing million proof pirate beer is lethal when everyone in washington has the warm weather crazies. we only get 2.5 months of perfect dream weather to make up for the drizzly grey bs so everyday is the end of the world in a town like tacoma where it’s still cool for everyone you know to have a drinking problem. apparently we can never go back to hanks.

heres why they freak me out. when i was little i saw a tv talk show where they had these identical twins who were separated at birth. one twin ended up getting adopted by one family who took him to the west of america, the other twin ended up being raised by a totally different family in the east of america. they lived in totally different households for 40 years.

then this tv talk show brought them together and the twins not only looked exactly the same, but dressed similarly, and were sorta the same temperament. everyone clapped. some cried. but i freaked out.

it bothered me that we might not have free will. that we are destined to be fat or skinny or crazy or sane. that nothing that we do is unique to our own personality and upbringing and life experiences. thus, why even bother? the last thing i would ever want to think is that my life is predetermined. that the lessons i learn dont shape me.

those f’ing twins who ended up mellow, slightly overweight, and had the same hair cut made me worry that we are who we’re going to be, no matter what we do, what books we read, what chicks we get naked with, what friends we meet, or what “accidents” befall us.

with that said, i dont think ive ever smiled as sinsterly as when i met lemei and lily, nor do i believe ive met anyone who loves twins more than ashley.

the other day improv everywhere did something with twins that would have freaked my ass off but woulda made ashley wet her thong.

hattip metafilter who also had a link to this video from German tv

tsar
spaceland
july 8, 2005

tsar stood at the door of their private jet and waved at the screaming girls who lined up to welcome them back home from their trip to the UK and four hours later ripped silverlake a new one in a blistering 45 minute set as headliners on a friday night on their home court of spaceland and sent the sold out crowd into a frenzy that hasnt been seen since, well, since the last time tsar played spaceland.

except this one went to 11.

donning his heep sop-choi dodger jersey frontman jeff whalen led his quartet through a scorching set of material off their latest album band girls money playing one song after another barely taking even a beat for a rest. one song bled into the next because why stop the rock infact how can you stop the rock. it was a runaway train with no brakes. it was the spaceshuttle with too much nitrous. it was a stampede with too much postage. it was a rock slide of rock, and avalance of power. it was thunder from so far under that the devil himself knocked on the door and asked if they could keep it down and the crowd thought it was part of the show but it wasnt and even the smoke machine was smokin.

the cool kids of silverlake couldnt control themselves. the ladies danced and the men threw their hands up in the air like they just didnt care and the brothas did the rockaway. jeff and dan leaned back leaned back and gave us all a generous what for.

mania nearly broke out when during the encore the band did something that in years i hadnt heard and ive seen and heard everything. they played two songs off their debut album. calling all destroyers and i dont wanna break up, which was like pouring gasoline onto a fire. super unleaded. and friends it was like an alcohol fire. people were jumping around children were screaming and old ladies were fainting in the aisles. satan spit out his pbr ripped off his shirt and jumped on the stage and stage dived into the mosh pit and slapped at hands that tried to feel him up.

i seriously have not seen a greater reaction to five year old songs in all of my days of wearing tsar shirts.

why were the kids krazed? because when tsar gets locked in they dont look back. and as some have complained, on this last tour the boys have not reached back into their catologue of former hits, and they have never played two in a row because who knows what evil may lurk when you start splitting atoms like that.

there were reports of earthquakes, booty shakes, and locust but that was unfounded. what happened was rock rose from the dead and slayed the emo hipster stranglehold that has terrorized popular music oh these many years and tsar regained their throne and had a feast at the feet of the dead.

afterwards i bought a tshirt, i tore down a poster, i took a zillion pictures and i kissed a pretty girl who asked to be pinched to prove that she wasnt dreaming.

but yes virginia there is a santa claus and he gave you the gift of music in the middle of summer and all he asks in return is for you to show him your tits.

tsar now heads off to the east coast where they are #1 in syracuse new york, where they are #15 in buffalo and where they will play in front of tens of thousands of people during summer rock fests this month.