on his great podcast
today he is putting all of those interviews on YouTube
i remember feeling a bit nervous when this came out because i was keeping it a little more real than I thought my bosses would be comfortable with
the beautiful julie van maldegaim sent me a three ring binder of all the letters i wrote her in high school
she had been keeping them all these years.
it’s a tiny bit cringey reading them because allllllll i talked about was the cubs
so im a little gunshy right now saying todays game was the best, most exciting one all season
which couldnta come at a more important time because cub fans are very nervous
because theyre gonna trade some of our favorite players, probably
even though they dont really have to
it’s just cheaper for them if they trade them right before their contract expires
that way they can get some young players out of the deal
otherwise they just lose them unless they pay market value.
the market value for the three guys whose contracts are expiring are about $20-$25million a year and most of them want 4-5 year contracts. So $400 million to keep them all
WHICH THEY SHOULD TOTALLY DO BECAUSE
in conclusion i am very sad i didnt grow into a gazillionaire
griffith j griffth, benefactor of griffith park was a terrible man
unless you think shooting your wife in the face is ok
all of santa monica hated him for that because she was the prettiest woman in the entire city
which is saying something because hoooo boy.
even back then.
griffith j went to jail for that. san quentin.
even though he used a defense that is no longer legal to even utter
your honor my client was totally drunk at the time.
didnt work for griffith j, and it aint gonna work for you.
weirdest part was, his lawyer, the one who tried that nonsense
had to do whatever he could because the prosecutor was the former governor of california
true story
drunk ass griffith j griffith wasnt even from the golden state
he was a former journalist from colorado who learned about alternatives during
the great gold rush
hauled ass down to mexico where he “found” a copper mine
mined the shit out of it and bought damn near all of the hollywood hills, los feliz
and a big ass house to annoy his hot wife.
like most angelenos, griffith was a transplant who spent money on things like mountains
which were totally impractical back then because you couldnt grow any fruits or vegetables up there
and they were filthy with wild animals who were just as dangerous as a newly rich coloradan with a gun and a bottle of jd.
earl rogers was his name
who
his lawyer.
was so good and so famous that they would later make a hit tv show after him
perry mason
why perry mason?
because earl rogers was from perry new york.
look it up for all i care.
earl had many famous cases including the one of clarence darrow that you might have heard of.
darrow was also a lawyer but he was accused of bribing a member of the jury during a very famous case, the one where these guys were being accused of blowing up the LA Times building which killed 21 people.
earl won, darrow went free and then was accused shortly thereafter of bribing another juror in that same case. earl won again.
but my favorite victory of his was he defended a man accused of murdering his wife and won by asking the jury to think of their own spouses. really think about them. and the jury said yeah not guilty.
afterwards his client wanted to hug him and earl rogers said, “get away from me you slimy pimp, you’re as guilty as hell and you know it.”
which is exactly why you should never worry what people think of you
history will forget almost everything
the only person anyone remembers out of this entire fascinating tale is
perry freaking mason
the fictional version of the late earl rogers who ran all of los angeles for a little while when the mayor got thrown in jail
but earl just doesnt sound as cool in an ozzy osbourne song
it’s because i had to force myself to wake up to get to Venice for a TWO PM interview.
how will i ever make it through the next 50 years of my life?
when i got there we had a 3 hour conversation that wore me out. not because he wasnt great, he was, we talked religion, music, rent control, he played a tenor sax for me. we talked about reeds and mouth pieces. food.
afterwards i walked along the boardwalk and talked with German in Venice.
i wanted good food but didnt find any that wasnt obscenely priced.
ended up at a Del Taco drive thru. my bill was $10 but they didnt take plastic bc their machine was broke
so they said, how much cash you got. i said $8. They said fine.
also gave me a really large straw, loved it.
when i got home i was exhausted and had a headache. COVID? i had touched a lot of people this week hanging will all my friends. hugs. shook hands 2x today.
so i took a nap. it turned into a very long one. at 1am i woke up and now im screwed. my body doesnt like long naps and loves to punish me for them.
i was awake when the paper arrived and i read this article that the majority of Black people in LA are not vaccinated. so i tweeted out to
that we need to do something. concerts? bbqs? raffles just for black folk? free movie tickets? i dont know. but this is crazy.
the last time i went to hawaii i was broke, unemployed, and unbeknownst to me, about to head off on a journey with a gazillion dollar company that would change my life forever.
not because of the job, technically, but because of what the job did.
it moved me to san francisco
and there i met people who i never thought id meet.
one being a brain surgeon who i dated for a while.
is there anything sexier than a smart person?
no.
learning things triggers a part of my brain that makes my heart beat faster which is interesting because i never really liked school.
maybe it was the context. when youre bowling, which was my first date with this brain surgeon, you dont expect to learn about some of the mysteries of the human condition
whereas in a classroom, often times you cant wait to leave, in part, because you are judged in there. especially me.
no matter what great ideas i would bring to the reading, i almost always had a teacher who would insult me for what i wrote down.
just be yourself is the mantra every kid is instructed. be creative. think outside the box.
but in school i was literally punished time and again for not writing down what jimmy and johnnie and monica would write down. so school was always a bummer for me. even though i loved learning.
anyways i need to sit by a pool for a few days.
today a fantastic woman dared me to write FIFTEEN PAGES of something cohesive
and i do owe someone who paid me a few hundred dollars to write something long
about the time i helped build a company and hired most of its people
but ive hesitated doing it because the true story involves
sex
sadness
and life changing change
but it also sets me up as the victim
and i dont ever want to portray myself as that because
well, fuck that.
theres enough victim stories in the Top 40.
probs the best song to come out this year was by that teen Olivia Rodrigo
one reason i love the Good Book so much is, despite everyone being victims pretty much
including God
Jesus is not one.
Even when his disciples wuss out on him and run away and refuse to say yeah He’s my boy
He does his thing, comes back and tells everyone, no it’s cool
just be super cool
im out,
but just be super cool people.
thats a way harder song to sing which is why Christian music blows so bad and it took Black folks to invent Gospel to put some zip into it.
can i write 15 pages, of course.
even if you are like me with ADD or whatever it is
you just write
one page a day.
even though i didnt get to sleep until 6, even though i woke up at noon thirty
even though i took a nap after dinner
am i stressed? am i love lorn? am i worried the cubs are gonna trade all their good dudes?
did i really break up with my shrink?
did i really make incredible rice a roni with tomato chunks and beyond beef?
am i gonna starve trying to do this podcast?
am i gonna irritate everyone with this podcast?
are the cops gonna kill me for criticizing them on twitter?
between you and me i sent in an application to work at one of the streaming services.
between you and me i set up a Patreon tonight for the pod and it already got a subscriber THANK YOU
between you and me i dont think ive had female companionship if you know what i mean all year. what if i get shut out this year completely?
is this what the Good Book meant when it said his favorite tribe walked through the wilderness
the desert?
will i find water out of rock?
will mana come down from heaven?
i think so too.