dear america, dear raymi, dear world, dear mom, dear paul westerberg, dear angus young, dear safe sex, dear giselle, dear flagrant, dear chick on the bus who offered me a puff of weed, dear inventors of wifi, dear glamour girl who’s going to come over here and fuck my brains out,

please help me.

everything is so fubar right now that i dont even know which way is up.

how is it that michael jackson is wanted as of press time, and rush limbaugh who is accused of being a primary player in a huge drug ring and who today is being accused of money-laundering isnt wanted?

how is it that larry king gets to be on tv every night and today had dr. phil of all people parade out all the ghouls of television-past including a droopy-chested liza minelli for his 70th birthday, and yet nobody is interested in getting twin peaks back on the air.

im tired.

im tired of this grind and anti feels it too and karisa feels it and i could seriously use a new weezer album.

they dont have to tour if they dont wanna.

just an ep if thats all you got.

its eleven pm and im out.

if the girl calls me again at two a.m. im going to have to refuse those long legs.

thats how tired i am of all of this.

fuck the o.c.

fuck the d.a.

fuck the e.i.b.

im reading the kurt kobain book that my bro ken is loaning me and you know what

some nights like this i really wish i was

alive.

anti + jaime + the cosby sweater

i hate to say it, but i think youre fucked.

i saw the press conference today of the santa barbara sheriffs, and the 60 deputies that they sent to your home in riot gear to storm your gates. i saw their smiles as they explained how the law has changed since 10 years ago, the last time you were accused of abusing a kid.

i made a note when they explained why they didnt come after you on halloween instead of when they did, yesterday, the day your latest greatest hits cd came out. they said they were busy ruining the halloweens of “50,000” partiers in Isla Vista.

apparently drunkards from uc san diego are more dangerous to santa barbara county than a reclusive alleged child molester if you read between the lines of the sb sheriff.

this accusation, soon-to-be arrest, and hoo-ha has gotten everyone who i work with to instantly deem you guilty.

just cuz youre freaky lookin

just cuz you were accused before

and just cuz you live a somewhat bizzare life.

obviously you have issues. but we all do. i blog like an addict. im obsessed with the fine music of rock group tsar. i ride a bus. but that doesnt mean that im a smooth criminal, no matter how many times i might be accused in the future.

just cuz youre a nut, doesnt make you a sicko, jacko.

so i will reserve judgement until the trial is completed.

and i will shake my head at officers of the law who smile over and over during press conferences about alleged child molestation.

call me crazy, but i think it is still entirely possible that multi-millionaires could be targets to fraudulent claims, and if i was a bad guy, and i wanted to ruin you and/or get money from you, the easiest way i could imagine is to bring up the kid stuff.

it does suck that you built this ranch that kids of all ages would love to visit. and it totally sucks that you love kids and everyone freaks out when youre near them. and it super totally sucks that any time theres a young boy near you everyone starts whispering.

and as a free man, innocent of any charges, you should be allowed to hang out with whoever you want to, especially if their parents said it was cool.

but as we say over and over on the busblog, life isnt fair. its not fair that you dance so good, or sing so well. its not fair that you sold all those gazillions of records. its not fair that you were thrust into the public eye at such a young age and it wrecked your childhood. it isnt fair that your dad whipped you and did who knows what to you.

its not fair that you got to date brooke shields and tatum o’neal and lisa marie presley.

its not fair that you should probably ixnay on having the kids overay, mj.

but it is probably a good idea.

for some people handling success is harder than getting it. for some people handling their private lives is tougher than handling their public one.

i wish you had been given better advice in relation to who your houseguests were.

and i really hope that what those smiling cops are saying isnt true.

cuz i think you rule.

love,

tony

michael jackson number ones + madpony + betsy

inventor of the internet, world ski jump champion, and the man who gave nirvana a chance and thus broke them on college radio.

born on a dinghy off the seattle sound, marc was swallowed by a whale and expelled off the sandy beaches of santa barbara where he befriended a volleyball and named him grungy

he lived on campus point beach for several years until the isla vista foot patrol discovered that he didnt have a permit for his bonfire, and after failing to pay his citation, arrested him and the judge sent him to ucsb for four years of hard time.

with good behavior he did five.

while in college he was the music director of the radio station. this was the magical time of the late 80s when hip hop, rock, metal, punk, and pop melded and bore a new music “grunge” a term mc brown bestowed on the joyful noise that was best represented from his hometown label, sub pop, in honor of his volleyball friend.

his popularity spread througout the campus and in 1990 he ran for associated student president, with help from his pals at the daily nexus, where he had become a media darling, occasionally writing music columns and opinion pieces, he won in a landslide. but always the pranksters, the nexus reported that he had only garnered 69 votes, a curious number but symbolic since it was the number on the LA Raiders football jersey that he was often caught ripping off his svelt frame and twirling above his head while dancing atop a picnic table at the local pizzeria, pizza marc’s, which many believed he owned.

and then he adopted a rap persona, mc brown and released the cult classic “mc brown goes to college” which was followed up with the smash hit “mc brown goes to night school”. the green 7″ singles were huge along the central coast, and peru.

since then marc has traveled the world, dated models, rock stars, and homeless women. he has started his own web design company with such clients as paramount pictures, rupaul, and most recently triumph the insult comic dog. who says affirmitive action doesnt work?

his macarthur park loft is so badass that hipster mag Dwell featured the inside of his pad and if you look closely in the first portion of Kill Bill you will see his garage as pretending to be the hospital garage where Uma finds the Pussy Machine.

founder, president, and inventor of Buzznet, the latest in blog technology that allows people to share pictures that theyve either taken from their digital cams or phone cams, marc continues to influence and feed off the ever-changing world of the internet like it aint no thing.

we are lucky to have marc brown in our collective lives.

which is why, when Thor Garcia finished his first book of short stories, he dedicated it to today’s birthday boy.

and why when you read this website and blog, you will see homages and praise doled out freely and lustingly in his general direction.

please join me in celebrating in mc browns birthday by either visiting his frequently updated blog, creating a buzznet account, pouring a gold bottle of boones farm on the ground like you just dont care.

wwmbd + marc at an art opening + the mc is a great photographer