wait a second, tony pierce, is that the only picture you could use?

wha?

come on man, show a little respect.

richie, there are sixty all-stars, im only going to interview a handfull of you, do you want to be on busblog or do you want to whine?

you’re right, im sorry. im just a little sensitive today.

shit, man, you should be. you’re like the strikeout king and you’re going to be facing like the best pitchers in all of baseball July 9th in your home park.

ok, shhhh.

but you’re doing a little better this year. only 71 whiffs in 82 games. thats not bad.

you know tony, you have a funny way of complimenting people.

seriously, last year you struck out 171 times, and now you’re an All-Star, dont you think that–

what are you saying?

what should i be saying?

you should be showing me some respect.

for what, for your 18 homers? you’re on pace to do what, hit 36? there were like 5 shortstops who hit 36 homers last year.

dude, im the second best first baseman in the NL.

exactly, but youre like the 11th best first baseman in the majors.

um, more like the 7th best in the majors.

is that something to be proud of, Richie? by the way, at what age do you say, “just call me Rich”?

let me ask you something, tony, where are you going to be sitting for the game?

on my couch, hopefully with a pretty girl.

well, im going to be sitting right inbetween sammy sosa and mike piazza. im going to meet famous people, sign autographs, and little kids are going to scream my name from the stands. if i was a betting man, i’d bet that i get the biggest applause out of any of the all-stars.

only cuz the cheeseheads can relate to a big tall loser like you. and only because the applause sign will be on, and only because the commisioner owns the team, oh strike that, i mean because his daughter owns the team. you’re the bitch that the Big Man brought to the dance. you deserve to be there as much as it deserves to be played in Milwaukee. you deserve to be there as much as Selig deserves to be Commish. you could at least be a man and admit it.

pierce, im going to meet you one day, i’ll be the guy 6’8″ who’ll knock your block off.

don’t whiff.

oh, i wont.

i bet you strike out both times you come up to the plate.

what do you want to bet?

everything.

ok, i’ll tell you what, if i strike out even once, you can say whatever you want about me on this page, but if i dont you’ve got to kiss my ass for the rest of the season the way you kiss anna’s ass.

deal.

have fun being a loser your whole life.

have fun living in milwaukee.

ok, that was low.

i know, i take it back.

good. why are you being such a dick?

i dont know, i guess im a little sensitive today too.

well, at least you get four days off in a row, i dont ever get that.

i guess, you’re right. ok, thanks richie, i’ll be grateful for what i got.

good idea.

bet’s still on though, strikeout king.

fine with me.

86. Lane McFadden