its four thirty in the morning

etienne miss montreal is snoozing in the lay-z-boy as vh1 classics plays softly and keeps her asleep.

its probably just a late night stony thought but i think i have decided that i will start writing more. more often. more and more and more.

none of its any good, so might as well have some quantity and maybe something will end up spectacular.

my problem is i read far too much. mostly blogs, but pretty much every magazine there is. and of course books. and letters sent from dirty girls who type to me from their bathtubs.

dear ev,

thank you for your invention.

it seriously has changed my life.

i know a lot of people have contributed to it, and thanks to all a them too. but thank you any way.

maybe this snoring girl would be here if it wasnt for blogger, but i aint so sure.

werent any chicks sending me letters from their tub when all i had was a web site. it was the blog people got excited about. and it was blogging that got people looking at the web for more than airline tickets and smut.

so thank you again.

southern girl called me today. no, not madpony. different girl. she said, you think im kidding, or that its somehow “safe” to say this because we live so far away, but i mean it, you bring it and i’d fuck the hell out of you.

and she said it so cute that i wish tivo was in my telephone.

nobody was inviting me to bring it when i had an open diary.

people werent sending me to aruba, or chipping in to buy me a car, or writing sweet things in my comments, and the LA Times wasnt interviewing me when i was working for billion dollar companies or making web pages in dreamweaver.

its blogger and the blogging phenomenon who’s responsible.

and if theres anything i can do for you in return, you got it.

forever indebted,


p.s. i told the girl on the phone that i would be on her doorstep the day after thanksgiving and she said oh, then she said, well, you better not, my dads a cop.

turns out shes thirty and still lives at home.

chers on. shes turning back time.

miss montreal grinds her teeth a little bit. but in a cute way.

she and i had a great talk yesterday.

shes really a terrific girl. courageous as hell.

she thinks she has strep throat and i told her she cant have strep, cuz we made out for hours twice this week and i dont have any damn strep throat and she said that she should stay away from me and i told her that i wasnt afraid of any damn strep, and i picked her up and brought her over here and we kissed during snl’s commercials.

its one of my new favorite drinking games.

they have so many commercials on that damn show, that every time theres a new one you have to drink, and then kiss.

we werent getting drunk enough so i changed the rules a little.

every time it sucked we took a drink.

i dont think miss montreal’s gonna wake up till thursday.

what other people accomplished at your age + flagrant is also in thailand

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