hey little kid at the gun show,

yes i do have a question for you.

i have lots of questions for you.

my first question for you is which of those rifles do you think Jesus would buy?

second question: dont more homosexuals frost their hair than heterosexuals?

third question: what are you doing with your hand in your pocket?

fourth question: what does being American mean to you? does it mean hating everyone who is different than you? does it mean trying to pass laws to prevent those people from living their lives?

fifth question: shouldnt you have an ozzy shirt on?

sixth question: unless your parents are jewish hippies, when you completely align with your parents in your teens you push back the normal period of rebellion into your college years.

do you realize that means that you will be listening to clay aiken on your 21st birthday and fugazi on your 22nd? thats like putting boiling water in a glass pitcher of ice.

do you realize youre about to crack? and you’ll be armed?

seventh question: shouldnt you be smoking weed, beating off to paused tivoed frames of jessica simpson’s cleavage, thinking the offspring are punk, and losing at online xbox games?

yes, canada, this is whats growing up right next door to you.

we can only hope he meets the right girl who slips him a little acid and takes him to prince concert.

or better yet, meets a boy.

aint no bad dude + karisa’s college apartment + annika flatters me

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