so i sit down after a morning full of meetings and my phone rings.

screen says “Dog, Tom”

i answer “please tell me youre calling me from Wrigley Field”

tomdog affirms my fondest wish. we exchange pleasantries. he tells me he will be drinking some Old Style in my honor, but tells me he wants me to know that he and Timmmmmaaaaayyyyy are thinking of me.

awwww

no longer than 1 minute later i get a text from my dear mother.

LOOKS LIKE THE ENTIRE FAM IS ALSO AT THE FRIENDLY CONFINES

WITHOUT ME!

AHHHHHHHHHRRRGGGGGG

looks like i will have to make a north side appearance before the season’s out so that the cubs wont forget who really loves em

ps my neice looks drunk

you hosers

now take off, eh

is scarier to people than the fear of death.

this is what i learned from moderating a panel yesterday in front of many of our biggest advertisers and partners: always speak to a group of people drinking free wine blocks away from the beach.

the panel was sharp and insightful, the audience was lively and engaging, and the people who put it together were amazing.

i was so nervous before the gig that i had convinced myself that i had gotten car sick. i couldnt stop taking deep breaths as we walked the stairs to the swanky restauant.

in the end everything went totally smooth.

like fine wine

and fried shrimp

on a sunny evening on the weessssside.