whats supposed to happen is all the ladies are supposed to go on strike and not buy anything.
even on their day they’re being told what to do.
now i could sit here and make a big long list of all the women who have supported me in one way or another or who gave me a break to go do my thing or who have shown me love in various ways.
but in a way that would be making this about me. it’s not. today is about them.
the women.
who weirdly are the majority of this country and yet they are treated like theyre not.
here’s the thing i dont understand. rape.
i have a niece who in a few years will be at college. hopefully she will choose the university of california, isla vista, which is a little slice of heaven on earth
but just like most universities, 1 out of every 3 women are sexually assaulted there.
wtf.
rape should have a mandatory minimum sentence of 5 years in jail. something tells me that might put a dent in terrible situation. maybe add this: if you rape again you get 15 years. rape again, life in prison.
women, the majority, should not have to fear walking down the street.
in america.
the beautiful.
the alleged land of the free.
if theres one gift men, who are in power, could give to our mothers and sisters and daughters and nieces, it would be actual safe streets. is that too hard? if it is then maybe we need to get out of power for a little while.
something tells me if the roles were reversed and instead of the US Senate having 21 female senators, it had 79… something tells me there would be mandatory minimums with rape convictions, women’s health would not be something we ever debated, and our country would be a lot more civil.
their founder is in fights with everyone and swears that he has grown and wants to be all peace and love, but hes so not peace and love unless it hits the news.
over the last 3 weeks i did over 100 UberSC trips. typically they rip us off on the fares and you have to write in and complain.
after a little back and forth they write back and say, fine heres your $35.
but when you do so many trips the difference isnt $35… in my case it is $156.
so i wrote last night and explained it, as usual, and today they fought with me, first lying by saying you have to do this within 3 days of the problem.
and then saying oh no we paid you soooo much money, which was another lie.
when i replied by saying, take a screenshot of you paying me soooo much money, they said fuck it, go to the Uber driver customer service way out in Redondo Beach and settle it there.
they gave me the hours, which are bankers hours basically. they do a half day on Saturday for some reason. why not a full day on Saturday?
i wrote back and said, no! this is so easy, just pay me i gave you the proof! but they said no.
so i started a brand new ticket, rewrote my genius, sent in different examples
but concluded the same thing, you owe me $156.
it’ll be interesting to see if it gets sent to different people.
hopefully someone there will understand my dilemma.
and with the money… i will buy a new tire for my car.
in the meanwhile i will drive exclusively for Lyft.
i was in my pjs. it was saturday. i was thinking about treating myself to some sushi delivery and calling it a night, when she texted:
ubering tonight?
no, i hit my goal yesterday. day off!
what are you gonna do?
jack shit! only got 1 day off over the last 2 weeks thanks to the Oscars, so im pooped.
perfect. be right over!
oh i would be the worst company ever. odds are very good that i would fall asleep in the middle of dinner.
why do i doubt this?
plus my house is a wreck, my medicine cabinet is bleeding from the inside, i still have a little cough going on close to a month now. i need a new bed room throw rug, my camera is broke, i cant find my second xbox controller, and i havent shaved my head since
there was a knock at the door.
there was a peek through the mexican blanket curtain.
there were high heeled shoes
legs like zz top
a completely ridiculous black dress so short the seamstress probably had a heart attack making
and either it was drizzling outside or she was wearing glitter.
she mouthed: i have cookies!
opened the door and fake news because she really didnt have cookies, she had cookie dough
this is easily the longest time i’ve gone without writing in this beautiful magical blog.
sorry, i was busy.
Andrew asks, How do you keep your forehead so wrinkle free?
I rub white girls on it.
Tim French wonders, What’s your favorite sandwich topping, and why?
Miracle Whip because it makes my 99 cent store cold cuts go down smooth and also because brown spicy mustard is rarely brown enough nor spicy enough.
Asher asks, Are you now the only person allowed to tweet behind the scenes at the Academy Awards?
My role the other night was to shoot the Snapchat story. It was pretty good mainly because I wasn’t distracted doing other things like Tweeting. In fact I don’t even think I tweeted on my personal account that day/night.
Jennie Roth queries, You have four hours to kill in downtown Toronto before the MG show next Saturday. What do you do?
I love this question. I have a pint with Pitt and Viv, then we go ice skating in that outdoor skate rink I think it’s Nathan Phillips Square or Jack Layton Circle. Then of course some poutine on Queens and then puke it out somewhere on the way to the gig.
Cheryl Devall asks, Who are you wearing in that photo?
Friar Tux!
Rob Shisler asks, Mr. Tony, your campaign seems to have the momentum of a runaway freight train. Why are you so popular?
I’ve never been popular. Even when this blog was getting 40 comments a day every day I was barely in the Technorati Top 200. This was back when there were only 200 blogs. But what I do have are an amazing group of friends and virtual friends who love real conversations about actual topics and not baloney. How did I attract them? All blessings come from Above.
Kate McLaughlin wonders, What advice would you give to your 18-year-old self?
Take more pictures.
Smelly Danielley asks, What kind of moisturizer do you use?
Hempz! (My mom got it for me)
Patrick Pitt asks, How do you want to be remembered?
As an honorable reflection of my mom, Isla Vista, and Generation X.
Bill Downing queries, Have you picked a running mate in 2020?
Oprah!
Mike Lazzaro wonders Bourbon/Whisky/Scotch?
Maker’s Mark / Redbreast / Gross
John Smith asks, do you ever work with celebrities now that you work at the academy?. . . and if so, who are the coolest ones to work with?
Other than hey can I take your picture? I can’t say I really work with the moviemakers. That may change soon. But so far I’ve noticed that everyone has been super cool and very easy to work with. For some reason everyone is nice to us at the Academy.
Adam Mefford wonders, Which celebrity are you most often confused for?
J. Lo
Dave LaDelfa asks, Do you have any advice for young people trying to break into the industry?
Read as many biographies and autobiographies of people in the industry as you can. It’s shocking to me how many young people make the same mistakes of the generations that came before them.
Dave Coelho queries, How many games will the Cubs win this year?
113 in the regular season, 7 in the playoffs, 4 in the world series, so 124?
Mat Gleason asks, Bryant, Schwarber and one pitcher of my choice for Trout straight up, you make that trade?
Schwarb is probably better placed in the AL, and the Halos will for surely lose Trout, so I would part ways with my favorite Cub for the MVP of the AL, but I would not give up the NL MVP. We have a lot of depth in the IF, I’d toss in Addison Russell, Jake Arrieta and one more pitcher.
Alyson Shane asks, What has been your favourite career-related experience so far?
Emilio Reyes Le Blanc wonders, Was the Oscar statue crafted from your physique?
It’s an artist’s rendition of what I will look like in 4-5 years if i gave up fast food.
DVL asks, Who invented liquid soap and why?
Charles Manson invented it. He hates bars.
Delores Dyer wonders, How do you heal a broken heart?
Like most things, you gotta kiss your way through the pain.
Kevin Davis says, Ok So youre on a boat. And you get married. Now that boat crosses the international dateline, so technically, its the day before. Are you still married?
My fear of commitment is the exact reason why I avoid boats.
Dave Olson asks Have you won a Tony Award?
No but lovely Shawna from Vegas went this year and took this picture for me.
Mary Schneider wonders, How much residual white powder is left in the bathroom at the Kodak theater?
People do those things when they want to get up. Don’t you think you’re already as up as you can be when you are at the Oscars?
Bob Downing asks, Can you please list your 2017 NL Central picks, and playoff/World Series picks?
Cubs 2. Ditka 3. Brew Crew
Then the Cubs beat the Dodgers in the playoffs then the Cubs beat the Mets in the other playoffs.
Then the Cubs beat the Red Sox in the World Series
Michael Katz asks, Is Joe Flacco a elite quarterback
Hell no.
Todd Cox wonders, why are fire engines red?
Because they don’t apply enough lotion before they go outside
Craig Wong inquires, Who’s more macho? Fernando Lamas or Ricardo Montalban? Who’s more macho? Lord lamas or montalban?
Mr. Fantasy Island is super macho especially in the episodes where he gets pissed off.
Nancy Rommelmann asks, What’s the old-school place to eat in Chicago, but not crusty?
The Billy Goat underneath the Tribune
Randy Holloway wonders, Why do you hate the best franchise in baseball?
The World Champion Chicago Cubs are my all time faves. Maybe you’ve seen my hat(s)
Guy Gottlieb sorta asked, Why didn’t you wear your hat to the Oscars?
I didn’t want to draw any attention from our invited guests.
Phil Shelly wonders, Why can’t you use a white, red, or black car while being an extra on Chicago Fire?
Because those are the ones they blow up
Tony Klecha asks, Stones or Beatles?
I like actual music, so Stones
Keith Johnson asks, The Thin Man or Boston Blackie
I fucking loooove The Thin Man!
Michelle H. Gurdal asks, What is your purpose?
I hope it’s to make amazing Bible movies, cuz that’s what I plan to do soon.
because the weather tonight was like a summers day.
wtf.
for some reason they wanna be in fights.
plus, in LA everyone is smokin, so.
this is easily the longest time i’ve gone without writing in this beautiful magical blog.
