but now is not the time. and its killing me.

one of the things i think i can announce but i want some other people to say it first.

what intersting is one is because of advertisements on this blog

and the other is because of my job.

it’s interesting because a year ago today there would be no way in hell that i would ever have anything to announce from my job other than i did something dumb like meet a famous celebrity for ten seconds,

and i had no ads.

so the question is, am i glad that i no longer work for the television network

and do i take back all the nasty things

ive said about advertisements on blogs?

i miss the good people of e of which there were many

and yes i take back all the nasty things

ive said about advertisements on blogs.

dooce who got fired because of her blog is now a top 100 blogger and charges $500 a week for an ad

and has five running right now.

how on earth could i be against that sort of sweet revenge?

has it changed the way she blogs – which was my prime fear about blog ads?

nope. she writes about being a mom and a wife and normal things.

she doesnt even post every day.

f you pay me.

anyways i dont believe this blog has changed because of ads, and whats interesting is the top ad i have right now is cafepress, of whom i have made my last two books from, and sold lots of other merch.

and the other ad is a book my college girlfriend jeanine cowrote (she got a discounted rate on the ad.)

i would have recommended these things anyways.

its one twenty two and at seven am im getting my brakes fixed and at eight thirty the dude is gonna patch up the bathroom wall.

sirius stock is trading at under six dollars a share and id invest but thats a third thing i cant talk about right now.

and a fourth is barely a secret either.

all four will be revealed next month so stay tuned.

in the meantime i want to start a book club.

and he did nothing about turned into water gushing through my laundry room wall today.

so because i wont be able to write very much today as i am watching the repair guy demolish my beautiful 1940s bathroom, i will reprint something that was printed in the Cubs official web site.

they have a good column over there where Carrie Muskat answers questions from the fans.

here was a good question and a good answer today.

Q. How did the Cubs get the name “Cubs”?
— Robert S., Salt Lake City, Utah

A. According to baseball historian Ed Hartig, the real name for the Cubs is the Chicago National League Ball Club Inc. Here’s some history: Following the formation of the American League in 1900, many of the National League’s best players jumped to the AL. Most NL camps in the early 1900s included many, many, many unproven players. This included Frank Selee’s 1902 Chicago NL team. The March 27, 1902, Chicago Daily News noted all the young players in camp referring to the team as “Selee’s Cubs.” An incredible 30 players would make their Cubs debut in 1902.

The name “Cubs” didn’t become official until 1907. Until then, each newspaper used whatever nickname they deemed appropriate. The team was called the White Stockings when the club joined the NL in 1876, the Orphans, the Black Stockings, the Spuds (because of their Irish owner, C.W. Murphy), the Nationals (all NL teams were called this at some point), the Colts, the Panamas, the Cowboys and a host of other nicknames.

Frank Chance preferred Cubs and convinced Charles Murphy to make it official in 1907. Even after the nickname become official, some papers still used unofficial nicknames. For example, during Johnny Evers’ tenure as Cubs manager, the team was often called the Trojans (Evers lived in Troy, N.Y.). And the nickname “Bruins” was commonly used from the 1940s to the 1980s. Rather than running “Cubs notes,” The Sporting News, for example, ran “Bruins Briefs.” Good thing they chose Cubs; otherwise, Ernie Banks would be “Mr. Spud.”

read the rest of the questions + more pics of the destruction + danielle isnt as bad off as she seems

has laker season tickets.

so yesterday as i was driving to lunch i rang him up to see if he went to the game or if he sold his seats.

“tone i went. and not only that, but the Lakers called me up before the game and asked me if i could make it down to Staples a little bit early, and i should bring my camera.”

turned out he had been selected in a daily raffle of season ticket holders who had been loyal to the team for several years. what they wanted to do was upgrade some of the upperdeck tickets to twelfth row jobbers.

first they took pictures with the laker girls, then they brought out some toys and merch for the kids, then they gave everyone better seats for the game.

so not only did my bro chris see the best laker performance he’d ever seen

but he did it in style,

and twelve rows from the court.

and he brought his camera, something he hardly ever does.

and of course we put those pictures up on buzznet for him.

he said the only picture he didnt get was when kobe gave him a high five as he exited the tunnel right before the opening lineup introductions.

chris is a good guy who has been blessed with good fortune so i told him that he should tell the lakers that maybe they should permanently move his seats down there, and in the spirit of keeping the good mojo flowing, perhaps he should remind the lakers what kobe did the other night and make sure to always slap his hand before introductions.

but chris said the magic idol might be his young daughter eliza who was not only there the other night, but also in attendence at the game where robert horry drained that sweet 3pointer to beat sacto back in the day.

and for all those naysayers who want to argue about the Raptors sucking or kobe hogging the ball, may i remind you that the Raptors were up by 15 in the 3rd quarter and it wasnt until the second half, after all the Lakers proved that they sucked, that kobe took over and shot lights out 55 points in those last two quarters.

i can understand how you can think kobe is a spoiled rich kid living in the OC with his flashy wife with her huge diamond rings

but anyone who scores 81 in a game deserves major props. i dont care if its in college highschool or even in the nba.

some of chris’s pics from the famous game

king of snl.

which is saying something when you consider who else was there

bill murray
eddie murphy
dan aykroyd
dana carvey
waynes world
farley, sandler, rock

all of em.

but im old enough to remember when saturday night live was just starting.

i believe i was 92 years old.

back then it was truly live. and weird.

and occassionally a little bit wild.

back in those days the wildest thing that you could find on television was harvey corman cracking up at tim conway and not being able to make it through a line.

so sex and drug jokes on network tv was pretty fascinating and no one in that original cast had that wild spirit that you could see just below the surface.

the samuri dry cleaner, the intolerant greek restaurant owner “no coke. pepsi.”, but particularily the weekend update reporter who could get heart attacks and die showed that dangerous edge which on live tv was riviting.

he was intense as joe cocker and subtle as jake blues.

but my favorite role of his was in Continental Divide when he plays tall skinny mike royko the chicago newspaper columnist.

who wrote one and two sentence paragraphs.

and talked about Chicagoians.

most people dont know that the Blues Brothers toured as a musical group for several years with Paul Schaeffer as the musical director and band leader.

they even opened for the Grateful Dead several times.

if mike royko was a blogger he’d post once a day and never on weekends. thats pretty much one reason idolize him.

when belushi starred in Animal House he was paid $40,000.

during his first season on saturday night live he was paid $750 a week.

i dont know why, but its nice to know the king got paid shit.

kimbalina + vortexia + oceanaria + sexoteric (nsfw)

took place a few blocks north of staples center, when the LA Times received word that yes Matt Welch would accept the offer and be their new assistant editor of their Opinion section.

yes, this is bigger news than Kobe.

almost.

this is isla vista in the house.

this is long beach in the house.

this is los feliz in the house.

matt welch isnt any ivy league fancyboy with lasik and his third beamer. hes a ucsb dropout, one of the original warbloggers, a prague xpat who covered the first nader campaign and is leaving a successful stint at the libertarian news journal Reason.

and todays proof that you do not need a college degree to be successful.

along with many ucsb daily nexus staffers of the late 80s early 90s matt started the first english daily newspaper in prauge, Prognosis, and at night drank beer and played guitar in several bands.

as Editor in Cheif he met with various members of government and once Prognosis had finished he easilly moved over to the Buddapest Business Journal with Ken Layne (now with Sploid) and Henry Copeland

before he left europe to return to america he found himself the hottest french girl he could find and

he asked her if she knew any hotter french girls that he might have overlooked somehow and she said no

but then after a few bottles of becherovka the truth came out and she said one name

emmanuelle.

he found her; promised her a life of angel games, neighbors whose pit bulls would bark throughout the night, and garden parties frequented by the likes of … bloggers.

she said oui and now you have someone at the la times who’s literally in bed with the french.

the nexus has breached the gates.

first with the daily news and now with the times.

and in pure isla vista style, welch did not kiss the host’s ass on his way in.

in late november he criticized the Times’ (lack of) coverage of the LAUSD trying to bulldoze 50 homes near downtown, and they printed it and paid him

in early novemeber he ridiculed the relationship between the Dodgers and LAT sports columnists Bill Plaschke and T.J. Simers.

“As every long-suffering sports fan in this town knows all too well, ‘the Los Angeles media’ is unfortunately synonymous with the Sports section of the paper you are holding. Especially its two loud-mouthed, value-subtracting columnists, Plaschke and T.J. Simers.”

and not only did they print that puppy too but they hired his ass to revitalize the section that they have struggled with for quite a long time now.

correct me if im wrong, but this could well be the highest ascension that a blogger has lept to from the blogosphere to the 4th estate. yes, there have been old media types who have taken to blogging, but to have a real warblogger make the jump from blogger.com to la times opinion page in less than five years is outstanding, and totally deserving of being compared to kobe’s feat last night.

looks like ive gotta get a subscription to the times now.

matt’s past columns + matt’s announcement + matt was tsar’s original bassplayer

this is now kobe bryant’s town, and this video explains why

thanks scott of the raptorblog who has more

laist + la observed + vince carter

i dont know what ive done to deserve such a blessing, but ive learned to adapt.

one of them sent me an open letter that Michael Moore addressed to canadian voters today, their election day.

she asked me politely to post it on my blog, and here i am doing it.

voila.

Michael Moore is currently in production on his next movie. As an avid lover of all things Canadian, he has issued the following statement regarding Canada’s upcoming election on Monday:

Oh, Canada — you’re not really going to elect a Conservative majority on Monday, are you? That’s a joke, right? I know you have a great sense of humor, and certainly a well-developed sense of irony, but this is no longer funny. Maybe it’s a new form of Canadian irony — reverse irony! OK, now I get it. First, you have the courage to stand against the war in Iraq — and then you elect a prime minister who’s for it. You declare gay people have equal rights — and then you elect a man who says they don’t. You give your native peoples the ir own autonomy and their own territory — and then you vote for a man who wants to cut aid to these poorest of your citizens. Wow, that is intense! Only Canadians could pull off a hat trick of humor like that. My hat’s off to you.

Far be it from me, as an American, to suggest what you should do. You already have too many Americans telling you what to do. Well, actually, you’ve got just one American who keeps telling you to roll over and fetch and sit. I hope you don’t feel this appeal of mine is too intrusive but I just couldn’t sit by, as your friend, and say nothing. Yes, I agree, the Liberals have some ‘ splainin’ to do. And yes, one party in power for more than a decade gets a little… long. But you have a parliamentary system (I’ll bet you didn’t know that — see, that’s why you need Americans telling you things!). There are ways at the polls to have your voices heard other than throwing the baby out with the bath water.

These are no ordinary times , and as you go to the polls on Monday, you do so while a man running the nation to the south of you is hoping you can lend him a hand by picking Stephen Harper because he’s a man who shares his world view. Do you want to help George Bush by turning Canada into his latest conquest? Is that how you want millions of us down here to see you from now on? The next notch in the cowboy belt? C’mon, where’s your Canadian pride? I mean, if you’re going to reduce Canada to a cheap download of Bush & Co., then at least don’t surrender so easily. Can’t you wait until he threatens to bomb Regina? Make him work for it, for Pete’s sake.

But seriously, I know you’re not going to elect a guy who should really be running for governor of Utah. Whew! I knew it! You almost had me there. Very funny. Don’t do that again. God, I love you, you crazy cold wonderful neighbors to my north. Don’t ever change.

Michael Moore

(Mr. Moore is not available for interviews because he now needs to address the situation in Azerbaijan. But he could be talked into it for a couple of tickets to a Leaf’s game. )

to put that in perspective, if i could average 20 points a game in the nba i would not only be a multi-millionare but i would probably be an all-star.

last night kobe scored enough for four all-stars.

steve nash was the nba mvp last year. he scored 28 points last night.

so kobe scored enough for three mvps.

elton brand was an early favorite for mvp this year. last night elton scored 12 points.

kobe scored more than six elton brands.

michael jordan’s biggest game was 69 points, infact only one other nba player has ever scored more points than kobe did last night, wilt chamberlain who wound up with an even 100 – a feat many attribute to his gigantic height (7’1″).

regular readers of the busblog know that im no fan of kobe bryant.

what he did to the lakers by causing such a stink that it drove shaq to miami, derek fisher to oakland, and phil jackson to write a book talking shit about the phenom – is inexcusable.

i also think he was insane to get married so young.

and i dont like the way he gave up on the mini-fro.

with that said i cant believe the local news made los angeles wait eight full minutes to tell us about shootouts on the streets, high winds, and national politics before they busted with the real news of the day:

that the lakers are back to being interesting again.

LA is not as cool when the lakers suck. thats just the facts.

and i dont know if a drug test is in order, but lamar odom is waltzing around the court like he’s back on the bong.

kobe didnt drop 81 last night cuz he was selfish, he knocked em down because lamar was 1-8 from the field. it was a necessity.

in what might be the highest production ever in a month, kobe in january scored 48, 50, 45, 41, 27, 38, 37, 51, 37, and now 81 points.

and during that tear the Lakers are 7-3, beating teams like philly, miami, indy, and cleveland. not too shabby.

sadly the kids over at metafilter who arent very good at talking sports, unless its soccer, chose to discount the incredible month that kobe and the lakers are having and instead focus on the long-forgotten rape accusation that was dropped once the young lady was to take the stand.

such a shame that some of the biggest Black athletes and celebs who have gone to court and exited innocent are often treated by some as if the mere accusation was enough to ensure guilt, and so therefore theyre guilty. forget what the court said.

but whats worse is that immediately after one of those athletes has the game of his life – one of the top games ever in the history of the league – those people cannot simply allow the game to be appreciated for just a little while. a few minutes even.

i have shaq’s rookie cards on my mantle, i have shaq mvp posters next to my fridge, i have phil jackson’s book on my boombox in my bathroom. mine is not a sanctuary for mr bryant.

but even i have to give him his props for totally dominating last night,

and for the first time in a very long time, i am glad that he’s the present and the future of this team.

words i never thought id type.

Update: Watch all 81 points here – thanks scott

I thought maybe you’d want to post something too, although I’m not sure what your stance on women’s rights/abortion is. I’d be interested to read your thoughts.

Brandice

Dear Brandice,

1. i heart abortions

2. women should have the right to choose what happens to their bodies

3. nobody has the right to tell me what i as a man can do with my body, you deserve that same courtesy.

4. unless the pro-lifers are going to petition congress to fund Education, Health Care, Public Housing, and Welfare the way we fund Defense, then their meddling with other people’s wombs are as irresponsible as they are overreaching.

5. if we are to pretend that we are any different than our so-called enemies around the world because of their lack of human rights and freedoms, then we are hypocritical if we dont give our women rights and freedoms.

6. since we are overpopulating the globe, we currently dont need any unwanted children, dummy.

7. theres nothing in the Bible denouncing abortions, despite the fact that it discusses hundreds of stories, scores of relationships, and a wide variety of ways that people have fucked up over the eons.

– Tony

hi tony.

whatcha doin?

growing.

yeah.

what cha doing?

trying to think of something to write.

why dont you tell us how great it is to live in hollywood california

nah

youre a nice young single man. healthy. smart. funny. rich. brave. handsome. hung. im sure you have some stories to tell.

god i love you Internet.

come on, tell us how warm it is there today!

i did wear a flannel. but yeah, i guess it was warm.

see! now tell us about something fun that happened there today. in hollywood. land of celebrities and rock stars.

hmmm.

surely something fantastically glamorous happened that you would want to share with the blogosphere. come now.

stars.. hmm. i dont want to say nothing happened great. maybe it did. i have a terrible memory…

you’re letting me down, bro.

i almost got hit by a jaguar this morning.

see, thats good! what year?

it was new. dealers plates.

oh… the ones that look like tauruses?

no no, this was from beverly hills jaguar, it was big and fancy.

Perfect tony Perfect!

yeah.

although, maybe you should have let him hit you.

it was a woman driving.

whatever, you woulda gotten rich!

dont they just pay for your broken legs or whatever?

pain and suffering, bro. pain and suffering!

shit.

i know!

shit.

i know

my fortune today said you will be rich and famous. fucker. pretty girl smiled at me. work was hard. lunch was fast. barely had any time even to take one fifteen minute break and i have this thing in my head that says that if i cant finish the work that somehow it was my fault. people have capacities too. dont we? you cant put a gallon and a half of milk into a gallon jug. and if you do you dont blame the jug.

sick thing is i love the fact that this job is so impossibly hard, so thankless, and so low paying.

i love it because the whole time my fro is as big as it can be, im wearing my corvids tshirt, im getting smiled at by the pretty girls, and my savings account just gets larger and larger, slowly, and the people who dont want me happy can only shrug while under their breath call me a fucking dumbass.

they watch me climb on the bus and i whisper who’s the dumbass now and i show the driver my monthly pass.

and old death is whistling at me from down a super long dark hallway with his come hither finger saying youre only getting older when are you going to grow up sellout and be mine and the oriental rugged floor sprinkled with opened condom wrappers athletic socks and newspapers says was someone speaking i swear i coulda heard someone say something ridiculously ignorant

lets change the world says the lamp

on the maxims

next to the greasy

knocked over

bucket

of extra crispy kfc

chickens

– originally posted two years ago today on the busblog

bazookiss + lexmonkey + christie is now on buzznet