glenda is having a going away party in frisco this weekend

an excerpt:

Now, before you say “another one bites the dust” because YET ANOTHER PERSON IS MOVING TO NEW YORK CITY, let me remind you that I’m actually from there and not simply moving to New York because I’m some sort of traitor. I’m moving to the Bronx (yeah yeah yeah, not Williamsburg; man, that’s soooooo 2003) and going to grad school!


What to say, huh? I’m leaving the Bay Area for the East Coast, and I would really love for you, the All-Star Traveling Team, to join me for a night of truly epic, face-melting karaoke battles (like back in the Bay Area Nerd Core days when the scene kids weren’t all doing it).

So, let’s meet up at one of my favorite local SF haunts – {redacted}. (Which, by the way, is remodelling the space! How appropriate… since I’m working on Glenda-B Version 3.0. 😉 )

I’m going to get to knock off something on my lifetime “All-Time To-Do” list, and that is to drive from coast-to-coast, relying on almost nothing next to my own wits and fists. While I do that, I get to hit the two ballparks in Missouri that I’ve never been to (which would bring my total count up to 25 of 30 ballparks), and as you know, what is summer without baseball and crazy road trips, anyway? Not much of a summer, I’ll tell you that much. =P

The catch is this: As part of the All-Star Travelling Team, you will have to autograph a baseball (which I will provide), to commemorate any instance in the last 6 years of you guys pulling me out of fights, texting random gibberish, doing insanely retarded roadtrips, breaking my toe, and all the other fun/awkward/hilarious “Wonder Years” stuff that we share. I will not forget them, and I most certainly will not forget you.

I will take the baseball home with me to New York, where I will someday come up with a case for it, in addition to some sort of baseball metaphor that will cause me to look back on my time in the Bay Area fondly. (Hell, it lasts longer than signing a card, right?) If your name is on the ball, rest assured you will always have a place to stay in NYC that will not cost you $350 a night, but NADA! (I’m going to be living in a palacial 3-bedroom crib that has more than enough room for everyone!)


she and artie lange are the only people id ever go to a yankee game with.

photo of glenda at the “how to rawk sxsw” by preppypunk

these dogs bark and i get all pissed

and think why do these dogs have to bark

why cant they just chill out and be mellow the way the rest of us are being.


but then i remember, oh yeah not all dogs realize that theyve been brought to this city not to be dogs aka animals who love to run around in the great outdoors and be free

but eating pissing and pooping machines who’ll get a pet every now and then but

and she wouldnt stop.

i thought what sorta date is this? am i on tv

am i her shrink? does she have no friends?

and for some reason i always think costumes can fix anything.

i thought maybe if she had a super tall pink hairdo

or a tuxedo dress

or a dress that looked like a swan,

everything would be all better.

and sometimes it sucks to be right.

Hi, Tony.

Wow. I have read your blog on and off since 2004, when I taught in Taiwan. Now I teach in Brooklyn & would like to use my blog to start a dialogue with other people about topics of importance to me. In order to do that I need more people to visit my blog. Will you link to my blog please? You will see I linked to you.
Thank you for writing every day. A simple thing, and yet truly inspiring.

Fondly, KB

Bonjour KB. it is my pleasure to write every day. and i literally mean that. i think its vital for people to get their creative juices going every day. and i just dont mean “creative” people. i mean all people, because everyone is creative.

sometimes creativity merely involves trying to figure out the way to describe the sickening sound of a car crash next to an elementary school. or the horror and then joy in finding that the cheeseburger you just made fell to the ground – but landed on the bun-side.

sometimes being creative is just explaining how when youre running at night you see varmints like baby possums who are even uglier than their parents. theyre whiter and grayer and even less afraid. other night i saw a baby possum cross Fountain Avenue toward my path.

me i have a wallet chain jangling, i have keys in my back pocket, im huffing and puffing like an olde man. things usually stop when they hear me and go the other way. dumb baby possum just skittered across the street Toward me, hid under a car and then jumped right in front of me like it drank some bad motor oil and needed an old slurpee to cleanse its disgusting mouth.

yes i think people should write every day. if only for 15 minutes. if only for 10 minutes. just tell us a tiny slice of what you saw or thought or felt. and your world and ours will be a better place.

beautiful Hollywood aside: when asked if she had any tips for aspiring starlets in hollywood, bette davis had the greatest line = “take Fountain“.

the magic touch of dylan callaghan

we tease cuz we love. but it sure looks like anything that dylan blows off turns to gold

first his xgirlfriends band Rocket got on tv, then got great, and now is doing some modeling

now his xguitarists band Mere Mortals just got picked up to open for Frank Black’s latest tour

mr welch says it a little nicer, as always, but maybe i should be dylans butler for a little while so when after he fires me i can get the nobel peace prize

anyway, feel like youve seen axel before? well he was at ken layne’s wedding a while back, last year the mortals opened for west indian girl at spaceland. he once told me that country music makes him laugh.