it’s one ive never seen before, and even though Isla Vista was a pleasant blur, I sorta remember that day

i was new. i didn’t know anyone. i was in the dorms. i was a transfer student coming into ucsb in the winter quarter. everyone had met and befriended everyone, but not me.

very quickly everyone was super nice to me, a trend that would go on all my time there.

they said hey we are all driving to a chinese restaurant. i was all, sure i’ll go.

the guy in the long hair and green sweater would eventually become my roommate. we had each been assigned these wild water polo frat boys who i tolerated but drove John crazy, so we traded roommates after a few months. he was into punk rock, the replacements and good books. i ended up annoying him too but we had respect for each other.

the young woman i dont remember at all but she not only remembers me clearly but swears we hung out more than i remember. over the last few months she has been a patreon of my podcast.

of not are my glow in the dark leopard print Converse hi tops which i got at the Converse outlet on Westwood Blvd near UCLA. back then the Village was poppin and brands often experimented with short runs of things to see if the kids would like them.

after i went nuts on facebook over the pic she posted this one from that same day

thats me at 21. very few pics show me that close up at that age. who knows what happened to that sweater. it disappeared like the hair 🙂

i have had such a blessed life surrounded by the coolest people who have always been so nice to me. i thank God for the experiences i have had. pics like this blow me away because we took so few photos back then and i am shocked when some surface knowing people have had these for decades,

now i wonder what else is out there.

how do you do it?

my mind is clicking, zipping, changing channels.

do you know how many ideas i have?

when i was in college i was in a poetry class. the nice teacher had a rule: you had to meet with her 2x after class throughout the semester.

the first time i went in there i said, i love your class. she said youre a very good writer. i said thank you! she said but you’re barely getting a B minus. i said, thats actually higher than i usually get in school.

she asked, well hopefully your final will improve your grade. is there anything you wanna talk about?

i said, yes, i have just written a 15 page poem about a girl i made out with over summer vacation. and i would like you to help me with the structure because it changes tempos and styles on every page like a crazy person.

and i gave her a rough draft of The Stamp which, among other things, tries to explain why time flies when youre having fun.

she sat there and read it and laughed and took a red pen to some of the first few pages, but then put it down on page 3 and just read.

when she was done she said, tony i want to ask you something. you halfway through your junior year. there is an exclusive college that i normally teach in where there are no grades, no tests, no finals.

you could write as many 15 page poems you want and not have to worry about B minuses or C plusses.

but it will take you a quarter or two for the approval process to allow you in.

would you be interested in staying at ucsb for two more years with no grades, or would you like to spend the next year and half with grades?

i said, before i answer that, i have a question for you. you say this is the college of creative studies.

i have always wondered about creativity, i said.

she perked up.

i asked, does it go away as you get older? most of my favorite musicians seem to lose their magic after their first few albums.

she said, it never goes away if you practice.

i said

and she said, not tom waits not elvis costello not bob dylan not coletrane or miles not bach

and i would wager, tony pierce will be writing epic love poems until he dies.

that teacher still follows me on facebook and that may be the greatest gift of all.

i have been blessed with many great teachers, but my favorite one was my last official one.

a fan of bob dylan, lou reed, the clash, and less popular stars like emily dickinson and others, robyn had the unique ability to make you feel like you were actually teaching her something every now and then

the college of creative studies was an oasis for many young people like me who struggled in traditional classrooms with bizarre structures and concepts like “grades”

at UCSB’s secret college, creatives were encouraged to allow their minds to roam free and promised that they would not be punished if they colored outside the box.

and yet, guidance was administered. in robyn’s case with the most gentle of nudges.

one young man whose name escapes me was raised in the midwest, which despite its charms, was narrow-minded when it came to matters of “alternative” sexuality. and so in a poem or a story this lad had a character rip into a series of gay epithets,

instead of saying “i get it that you’re 21 but do you not know the first thing about some of your heroes and the names they were called? why would you lower yourself to such base and predictable dialogue from the mouths of your characters? and, indeed, why must you insist on being a basic bitch?”

robyn instead wrote in a little note next to the quotes, “you can do better tony”

and that young man never wrote such things ever again.

while many of my heroes are controversial and divisive and burned bridges here and there, somehow robyn was loved by every single person she came in contact with. which isn’t to say there was not conflict in her classroom. i remember more than one student who felt uncomfortable in a class of hers and acted out, causing quite the scene.

and it was shocking watching her handle the students. her smile became stern. her voice lowered. and lasers shot out of her eyes, hypnotising the young demons right there in their chairs.

i saw one youngster levitate and then fall when he raised his voice to the professor.

he asked to be excused and scurried down the hall past the free pizza and disappear into the sky.

but mostly i watched how in just a matter of weeks students who were incredibly distracted by all types of things at the beach side party school, read the books she assigned, hand in the papers, and grow as writers.

the things i learned from her i use every day in almost everything i write. and when i teach i do my best to steal everything i can remember.

today is her birthday and we are all so lucky to have received the blessing of her presence. the next statue they tear down they should replace with one for Robyn.

as The New England Mystic once said,

spark one up for the woman who gave your life zing. you owe her almost everything.