hi lenny kravitz, nice wig.

yeah. yeah. hey tony, mind if i take over your blog when you go on vacation?

only if you only talk about what happens backstage at your concerts.

oh, man, all i do is drink juice, talk to the entertainment reporters, and do yoga.

it’s who youre doing the yoga with, lenny, that im sure readers of my blog would be interested in learning about.

ive been housesitting in your neighborhood, tony pierce. every day i see a different girl show up.

those are my cousins. they like to cook. if they make a big meal, they’ll put some in tupperware and bring it over.

those are some mighty close hugs youre giving your cousins.

im very grateful for their food.

most of these girls are white, tony.

nah, just light skinned. you know how it is.

one of the girls was chinese.

that was saki, she’s japanese.

you have a japanese cousin?

no, that was a chick i met at the Nacional.

so you are dating her!

actually she brought over some tempura.

but you kissed her, i saw it!

no no. she just had a little spinach in her teeth that i was helping her remove. and my hands were full. of tupperware.

anyway, what about the blog? can i do it? please?

only if you talk about lisa bonet.

you’re a gentleman, like me. we dont kiss and tell.

good point, lenny. whats up with you selling all the stuff in your new orleans house?

ironically, me and lisa used to live there right before the “let love rule” album was recorded. i never felt right back there after we split. i didnt do my taxes so well last year, so i figured i’d just sell everything in the place.

even the suit of armor?!

it’s not as kinky as i was hoping it would be.

im gonna steal from the obvious blog right now.

what?

lenny, in five words, describe what its like to be a handsome lead guitar singer songwriter frontman

redhead mondays, brunettes tuesdays; twins

im not sure i understand, lenny, im not sure im worthy to understand.

its not a wig, by the way.

then screw you, you cant borrow my blog.

why?

cuz only i can lie here.