so bored last night

nothing at all going on and then i remembered that i hadnt called my mom yet for her birthday. when i got her on all we did was talk about politics. it was pretty funny.

she asked me to start writing about kerry more on here because she is afraid that bush will win again. i was all mom, i only get 1,000 hits a day. she was all, thats 7,000 a week.

she said is the old lady who lives across the street registered to vote?

i was like Mom! shes 91 years old, shes not gonna go to any polling booths. and she said Vote by Mail!

and you know thats what we have to start thinking about. think about your neighbors, think about your block. who on your block might not vote if not for you? that retard kid at the mail boxes etc… is he 18? register his ass. the old man who walks his crazy three legged dog. ask him if he’s registered. all the people you work with. apu at the quickie mart.

if you can register two people who wouldnt vote if it werent for you then maybe one of them will vote.

thats called making a difference busbloggers. in boy scouts you would have gotten a Civil Service badge. but since this is the real world, it will get you a real president instead of this dillweed we got now.

so heres my john kerry story for the day.

as you know im a big fan of the Regis and Kelly Lee show. well this morning old regis had a great show, sen kerry and tiger woods. not bad. two guys who oughtta be doing a lot better than theyre doing.

so kerry is being asked about this and that and regis says so what about these debates. and it might have been a set up, like kerry might have said, hey ask me about the debates when i get out there

cuz when reege goes how about these debates

kerry goes, yeah we have three lined up but the president wants to have a few lifelines for the hard questions.

nearly choked on my apple juice it was so funny.

just another blog + listen missy + welch points us to an upcoming piece in the air force times about bush’s stint

family bonds

hbo

sundays 10pm

i have a new favorite show. thank you hbo. it’s called family bonds. it’s about a family where the papa is a bail bondsman.

part Cops part Sopranos, HBO takes us into the home and into the van of some of the toughest s.o.b.s youd never want to meet.

the dad is so abrasive that as he is teaching his nine year old son how to ride a bike he calls him names and makes the little fella cry. sad and touching as it is, i found myself chuckling as the sobbing kid ran to his mothers arms.

the tough love doesnt end there. when calling an ex-con who forgot to pay the bail that is owed, our hero, tom evangelista, tells the con’s girlfriend, “did your boyfriend like Riker’s Island? Cuz if he doesnt pay up, he’s going back!”

theres a scene where the wives of the bondsmen discuss their sex life. theres the hot daughter who works at the office and consoles a coworker that she wont get yelled at for not having the right paperwork ready.

it’s the prefect family doing dangerous work and not giving an f what anyone else things about anything.

i love it and im sure you will love it too.

unless youre a nine year old with sensitive feelings.

or an ex con on the run.

my only question is, how does Showtime feel to have its ass kicked routinely by HBO at everything?

UCSB alert: former Associated Students Program Board member Pax Wasserman is co-producer of this fine series.

the santa barbara mafia marches on…

danielle + katie + ron

I know a lot of people.

Way more than I can keep track of.

One of my friends is a correctional officer in a state prison. Another friend has a brother who is about to go to the clink.

I asked the one friend if she had any tips for the other as to how not to get raped in jail.

Below is what she wrote in her blog today.

How To Avoid Getting Raped in Jail

Name was changed for safety and anonyminity)

Mike was selling drugs and in the end somebody died from the drugs Mike sold. Mike was charged with manslaughter. Mike pled down his charges to possession. Mike might have some history being in-and-out of jail. Mike is going to spend 10 months in prison for this crime. Mike is a white boy, not sure of age. Standard American boy looks, in decent shape and is able to handle his own(based on information given).

Mike will be entering a whole new world from what he is used to. He will go into a new home for 10 months (which can feel like forever in prison). He will most likely be the one of the minorities.

THE GAME STARTS:

He will come in and be introduced to the system via a correctional officer (CO). This CO might be nice, might be cold, might try to intimidate you, Mike must figure out what kind of person the CO is. Mike’s best bet is to be calm and respectable no matter what kind of CO is with him. After his brief introduction he will be placed in an area called something like R & O (receiving and orientation). Now this is not as pleasant sounding as it seems. This is where you will be evaluated and get housed with other people who are there on similar charges and some way different(child sex offenders) than Mike’s.

There might even be what is called an Old Number. Someone who is returning on a new charge but has definitely been in before. These guys are trying to intimidate you and at the same time try and make you feel a part of their group of friends. They try to use you, put blame on you, scare you (intimidate you) or are legit and just making new friends with you. It is has now become a tough game of trying to figure out who-is-who and what they really want. Mike’s best bet in the beginning is to be calm and respectable and say as little as possible about himself.

THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM:

Mike will live here temporarily and play the game. He will have to be there to know what I mean. It is very touch and go, over whom you spend your free time with, what you will give up (whether it be rec time, rec activities, food or clothes)and this can go wither way-from him to someone else or from someone else demanding it from him, Mike might even get away with doing nothing at all. Mike will go about his daily activities. Wake-up, chow, rec, maybe work (if he is lucky to have a job), rack-in (go to your cell and be locked in), some form of count will always take place(sometimes more often than Mike will like), chow, more rec, more activities, maybe more work, rack-in, count, rec, rack-in, count, lights out, count, count, count, count, count, count until morning arrives and he gets to do it again.

This can become quite frustrating for someone who is not used to doing what he told and when without a why.

SUPPORT:

Mike can change as a person during this time. Mike needs support. His best support would come from many, many, many letters from friends and family. Reminding him that his time will be over soon and life will go on (Lot’s of I love you’s too). Mike will also have a chance to make phone calls, hopefully the person receiving the calls can handle the huge, expensive phone bills that will acquire during 10 months time. During phone call time, friends and family should remember to let Mike lead the calls. If Mike wants to talk about how shitty it is, let Mike vent and say you are sorry and let him vent some more. Do not argue with Mike, Do not get to the point where you tell him he deserves this when you are pissed, do not leave Mike feeling he has no-one to listen. Mike can get into BIG trouble for being upset later on. If Mike has nothing to say, tell him about you daily activities without rubbing it in that he was not present. If you are a female friends assume he will count on you for companionship. It might become stronger or it might become a whole new form of love you would have never expected. Mike needs companionship. His celly can not provide it whether Mike believes they can or not. YOU, his friends and family must provide the true companionship and love and support. No one inside can, if Mike thinks they can, Mike is following right into their trap.

for more jail-related blog enteries, go to her blog here

last night i went on a job interview

for a company interested in having me as a blogger. it was pretty interesting. they were asking me if i thought i could do more than three posts a day.

i was all, dude, what you see on the busblog is what i do during the two government mandated 15 minute breaks that i take during my incredibly hectic workdays.

he was all, how hectic could it be?

and i said, sir, i love to write. LOVE. i think about it all the time. i see pictures and i want to steal them for my blog. i see stories and i want to figure out how to write about them in fresh new ways. if i take pictures i want to make photo essays. but then work happens and some days i can only do two posts.

that means that either i had a lunch date, or i wasnt able to take one of the 15 minute breaks and i had to write during lunch.

i dont even have time to edit what i write. or even read it for that matter.

he was all, so would you consider yourself obsessed?

i was like, probably.

he said, is it like alcoholism?

what?

he was getting weird on me.

i went on it again saying, im passionate about writing. i love to write. writing is something that gets me going, it gets my brain going, as i write i discover things that are really there. i have never been an alcoholic but i imagine that when people really get drinking they discover things that are Not really there.

my cravings to write, i said, are constructive. they’re healthy. abusing your body is a much different thing.

he said, if you could write all day for this company, would you be able to edit yourself from swearing?

of course.

would you be able to use the [shift] key?

i wanted to say duh, but i just said, yes sir.

we run a clean site here, he said, could you refrain from using pictures of the scantilly clad women that you use on your blog?

i said, sir, the busblog is my personal web page. it’s an extension of my personal beliefs and hobbies and loves and lusts. very little of what i do or talk about in my personal life do i expect to be able to talk about on a corporate web blog like yours. i doubt i will ever have the opportunity to write about the cubs or my friend’s band tsar or dating anna kournikova or calling the president a retard.

he said, you called the president a retard on your blog?

and he turned around a picture on his desk of the retard with his family at the white house and the rest of the interview was him trying to ask me questions about dan rather and me trying to will my cell phone to ring.

looks like i will be at the xbi for a little while longer.

bicycle mark + jack bog + zulieka