theres not a lot of things that i want any more

when i was in school i obsessed about having a girlfriend. and even though ive had amazing ones, truly spectacular ones, i soon discovered how different they are in reality compared to the dream.

infact the other day someone reminded me how when we first kissed i told her she was a bad kisser. in truth she just couldnt live up to how i was expecting it to be: all fireworksy and magical and awe-inspiring. fortunately her kisses would accomplish those levels later.

but this Christmas the only thing i really wanted was a really nice camera. i mean really nice. like damn near professional. i work with professionals and they were all, you need this one that cost $5k, others said nah you can get away with one that only cost $3k but you’ll need a $1k lens. so i saved up, but then my car nearly exploded, then i got suckered into flying to toronto for new years, then i remembered i had to buy gifts for lots of cool people.

so i gave up on the one thing i wanted, and was totally cool with just getting it later once everything blew over.

and then i got to chicago and santa had something waiting for me. and he said i had to open it early so i could get this entire trip documented.

and friends, it was exactly what i wanted. a canon d7. i was shocked.

i was so shocked i was almost sad. it was almost like getting the kiss from the prettiest girl in school well before you knew what to do about it. i felt instantly terribly guilty. i felt super undeserving. i suddenly felt like there would be no way for me to master the amazingness that this beastly tool could muster.

i didnt take it out of the box for a good half hour out of just pure awe of what it all embodied.

strangely it didnt come with a memory card, but i bought one on the way to my sisters house and i took some pics of her adorable kids

and these four semi-cute puppies in her kitchen

and here it is 4:04am and i cant fall asleep because i dont wanna wake up and find out its all a terrible dream.