i knew she was a model right away

modelshe was tall, skinny, carefree. made me wait.

i got pinged about 7 minutes away. i was in venice. i forget why. who knows.

it was surging almost double the normal price so i accepted it.

youd think if you ping an uber and 7 minutes later youd be ready, but think again. life isnt like that. youre gonna wait. the pin was dropped on a lifeguard station on the beach so as i went down as far as i could on the street i called.

hey this is uber

hi yeah, can you wait just a minute, im in the candy store on the boardwalk.

did this piss me off? of course. it’s my fatal flaw. it’s the thing that will probably kill me one day. it’ll give me a heart attack. for some reason i believe that if when you order your uber and it says he will be there in 7 minutes, you should be outside waiting when it says he will arrive.

NOT omg i have 7 minutes, lets browse and then BUY THINGS at the candy store.

so as i waited in an alley right near the beach i took a snapchat of the scene – which was beautiful – the sun had set – the seagulls had descended – the shops were closing up – the tourists were strolling

the palm trees were saying just enjoy where youre at, tony,

not where you think you should be

so i did.

and she emerged from the candy store, a tall


dark figure with good hair and a little bag

she got in behind me

said, wanna gummy bear


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