hi tony

you know i love you, right?

you do? why do you?

las vegas i love that its midnight and im topless sitting at this table with dinosaur jr. going thru the open door.

ive been here with matt good listening to his new album and talking to him about it. every now and then he’ll pick up his guitar and play me what hes talking about, and i must say, if youre ever going to get familiar with a new record, this is the way to do it.

with you, las vegas

at yr hottest.

awwww, i love you too tony. tell me more.

las vegas i love that its really hard to find a head shop on the strip

no, not about me, about matt. tell me about the record.

well matt recently had a very emotional divorce and was prescribed some meds when he was diagnosed to have bipolar and forgot how many he had taken and accidentally ended up od’ing on them and wound up in the hospital and almost dying

and this is the record that he wrote while in that emotional rollercoaster and, predictably, its damn good.

my favorite song is about helicopters.

because theyre black.

the kids in the blogs talk about matts lyrics but in these songs, theyre cutting and biting and funny and fierce.

its called hospital music and the single “born losers” was released yesterday in canada and its #14 on the charts up there or something, vegas let me tell you how nice your stars looked last night as this military plane flew overhead last night at 3am, ive been up late and up early and i definitely want to retire here

with you, las vegas.

are there any cover songs on the album?

mais oui sin city mais oui

did led zep steal some of their best songs + malingering in top form + moxie will interview me today at 5pm PT

its 347am. im with matt good. actually hes asleep because hes a sensitive artist, and im bloggin in my shorts in the back yard next to the pool and hot tub.

we’re in a gated community because matt is getting ready to have a solo tour and a press tour and all this stuff. so he wanted to come down here to vegas to chill out in the desert before the madness starts.

on friday hes gonna stream his album online. and if you listen carefully you might hear yours truly in the stream. actually you wont have to even listen too carefully, all you will have to do is listen and there i will be.

i dont know how much is ok for me to say, so i will wait until i have the ok from mg about the low down. but regardless if youre from canada and love mr good and will be listening on friday then all will be well.

god im delerious. not because we’ve been partyinjg too much or anything. infact i drink and smoke way more than my host, im just exhausted from driving and working and hosting my own bbq on sunday and ahhhhh – i need this backyard of desert zen as much as bro does.

so hopefully i took care of business tonight and i can be a good guest tomorrow. and hopefuly these flying things that have been runninginto my legs arent mosquitoes because in LA we dont have those.

and hopefully i didnt really drive to vegas in 4 hours because if i did then i might be coming here more than i normally do. but im pretty sure i left the house at 2pm and got here at 6pm.

why 2pm and not noon, as i promised matt? oh because i packed up like Everything in my house because im here for almost a week. oh and also because even though my housessitter said she didnt care how dirty i left the place you really shouldnt leave half the stuff out that its my house. i mean, clean my house is disgusting, Lord help the prying eyes who pay attention to that pile in the corner or that buldge in the floorboards.

let me tell you about this one thing before i go to shit its 4am!?!? ok

i was tooling pretty fast on the 210 freeway. not too fast, mom. but pretty fast. you have to because the traffic is gonna hit unless you get out of its way.

and then we hit traffic in the middle of no where and i got really mad.

so i started thinking all these negative thoughts which i Rarely do because i trick myself constantly to think of good things cuz i can spiral down a hole faster than you can say nevermind.

so i thought, shit summers here, lets think about the best kiss that you got all spring.

and people, that was such a great exercise that it made me want to kiss a whole bunch of girls here in vegas so if i hit traffic on the way home i can snap myself out of it again.

for the record my favorite kiss of spring was at sxsw by a girl who i didnt fully appreciate until she was gone and i know you read the busblog still baby so hi and i told you i was a dipshit american loser who you should avoid.

ps if you live in LA, we’re going to have a contest today on LAist to win tickets to see Snoop Dogg at a BET Awards after party. Snoop is going to be backed by his band the Snoopadelics, and opening the show will be Dolemite. the show is tonight, if you live in LA and wanna go, enter!

pps that car above is whats in the garage.

because now we have identified all the pussy ass bitches.

you know, the ones who think that daddy will defend them. the ones who are afraid of liquids on airplanes, michael moore, and cindy sheehan. the ones who pretend that it would have been worse before the so called war with the guy who said its the environment stupid or the one during the war who was an actual war hero.

thanks to bush cheney we know who all the people are who care more about “their” party than the constitution, who were all big fuckin tough guys when they thought they had bill clinton breaing the law, but are suddenly big sweaty vaginas when it comes to the president the vice president the ag the majority whip the minority whip and even rush limbaugh breaking more laws than nwa ever did.

and lets not even mention the torture the secret prisons and all the failed coverups.

this week bush cheney when told that they were caught (again) raping the country pulled the hair harder and shoved their stumps in just a bit deeper.

instapundit tries to spin it by saying, yeah its brutal ass rape

but.

company man all the way.

the pendulum is going to swing back and the great thing about the internet is its all going to be there for everyone to look back at and gasp.

all those people were so wrong, our kids will say.

and we’ll say yep.

and the kids will say, but when did they finally realize how wrong they were?

and we’ll say, babies, they always knew they were wrong. but they just kept letting it happen and kept saying

but

and kept standing there and watching as the shit went down that had no business going down.

they were not just part of the problem they were the problem.

are the problem.

well, part of the problem, because there are a gazillion people on the other side who are sitting around doing nothing either.

i dont know anything about rape but maybe sometimes when something so wrong happens in front of you you freeze up for a few minutes or something.

one of the best things about michael moores Sicko is that he brought up the fact that the people of France stand up and protest for the things that they want. they cause problems.

now here in LA our cops shot rubber bullets at us but the nra has been passing out guns door to door here in LA and pretty soon we’re all going to have rubber bullet guns to shoot back at the cops.

just like in france.

except just like how they improved cars and the blues and popular dancing, the blacks and mexicans of LA are pimping out these rubber bullet guns super nice.

theyre making them bigger than the cops’

and cooler.

i just got a housesitter. im going to vegas monday morn.

on sundance called Sunken Treasure live from the Pacific Northwest where he was getting distracted by this exhuberent crowd that was talking and yelling at him and he was trying to be cool about it but then he just had to lay down the law. then he was all fuckit lets just have a sing-a-long.

maybe its being from chicago but i totally understand tweedys point of view and i can understand the crowds point of view. if im alone i just want to listen but if im with someone cool i will talk in the back.

when karisa and i were just sorta getting to know each other we were at the hollywood bowl and carlos santana was putting on a really bad show because every song sounded exactly like the record and it was boring and too clean and had no soul and no magic so we just went up to the worst seats and talked and talked.

but then i was just at the hollywood bowl for pink floyd and i was really glad that no one was talking because it was fuckin dark side man.

rarely do i procrastinate on things for work but for some reason i wasnt writing these reviews from last week. last week i went to 5 concerts in 5 days which is rare for me because i like to give concert tickets to the writers to let them enjoy the rock, but i had to see these shows. plus i wanted to see these shows.

so yesterday i wrote all five reviews in about an hour. procrastination is sweeping the nation. and its easily defeated.

talked to chris today for hours. f the delay when you call overseas. we kept stepping over each others words.

finally i just said, i bet your thong smells totally different nowadays.

she was all, excuse me, i dont wear a thong out here!

she told me that all the little boys shaved off their hair.

i said because its summer now?

she said hi im at the equator, its always summer here.

i said, because they saw a picture of me and they think im a god?

i never know what to tell her about what shes missing by not being in america. valerie bertinelli is fat and trying to lose 30 pounds off jenny craig? that paris hilton is now going to go on larry king for zero dollars instead of a million on nbc? that bush and cheney are now trying to pretend that theyre not part of the executive branch?

i told her about ron paul.

she said thats nice but if hes so smart why is he aligning himself with the most corrupt political party america has ever had?

and thats why shes my baby.

even though i will probably never smell whats going on down there again.

the beautiful dutch girl, justagirl, bought me this sheet set for Christmas, and all she asked for was a picture.

here it is now almost exactly six months later and here i am doling out a picture.

i suck baby, im sorry.

if indeed i see you in canada i will make it up to you.

but the cubs beat the white sox and i have a date tonight.

so i win you fucking old lady.

because i still have a few readers

things to do for thurs – there should always be 10
1. get dirt
2. pay parking ticket
3. get motel for vancouver
4. send in expenses
5. beat off
6. get oil changed
7. mail fil his cds
8. write about seeing 5 concerts in 5 days last week
9. get a hand mirror
10. get some black duct tape

which bothers me because if theres one thing that undercover superheroes want to do is save the world. therefore when their friends are in need of being saved things are very tough because for some reason its easier – way easier, actually – to save strangers than your friends.

which is why it helps to be a master of disguises.

form of a blog post… if anyone should be depressed its your narrator. water water everywhere but not a drop to stick my fingers into and lick if you know what i mean.

despite being a hundred and twenty eight i still have my needs and sometimes you dont realize that youve put all of your cheerleaders on time out and noone is very happy with you. and the cubs are losing. and we traded our catcher to SAN DIEGO for some reason. because he gets into fights with the pitchers? good fuck the pitchers who give up 13 hits in one game. i dont care what your last names rhymes with.

when i was a lad my dream was to be the manager of the cubs. and a lot of my dreams the Lord just said, dude, good dreams but chill we’ll have someone else take care of those for you. so instead of having kids that look like me, my sister took care of that and instead of managing the cubs to a raucous crazy summer, the Lord assigned Lou Pinella to do it for me.

the Creator, it appears wants me to write blog posts to you. and more of them. fine.

today i drove around hollywood and this guy was getting impatiant in the left hand turn lane. both lanes on the right of him were empty and there was a green light. i knew all of this because i was 10 cars behind and all i saw was daylight in two lanes.

but fucker decides that he isnt going to wait to turn left, instead hes going to go right over two lanes, turn right and pull a U turn – thus catching that light so he can make his original left.

hard to explain.

doesnt matter. because he had to cut across my path to do it i laid on the horn like no other man has ever. because thats seriously bullshit. and when he pulled his u turn i thought he was coming after me. and one of the benefits of not getting laid in far too long is youre ready to fight some asshole who instead of waiting to turn left – cuts across three lanes to the right to pull a u turn.

so when he did his u turn i pulled over to the right lane and parked. because as a superhero the last thing you want is for some jackhole to get people in an accident as he tries to speed down sunset blvd chasing down the asswipe who honked at him.

so i pulled over and got out of my car and with one hand i kept sustaining the horn and with my other hand i flipped him off as he waited for the light to turn green.

and if i wasnt in the xbi i would have pulled out my pistol and shot out some tires.

all of this, btw happened right below the CNN building, a huge tower where nothing happens inside, but everything is happening around it.

i was reading on blogging.la that yesterday was the last day to go thru the old spaghetti factory, and it made me think of the only time i ever went there, this time i went there with ashley.

and then i got an email with a link to this video of ashley in what appears to be a student film of some sort.

and then i got another email from a friend who wants me to visit him in vegas for a few days.

so i said, iron mike, you’ll always be the champ to me, so of course i will go out there.

but i wont see ashley because she was very mean to me several times, and im a sensitive poet. wah.

also yesterday i was on the rooftop of a record label and i got to listen to one of my favorite new bands, sea wolf. and i got to meet the main dude of silversun pickups and every one was extremely nice and there was free beers and tacos and corn on the cob and good music and great people, but i was working so i didnt eat any tacos,

but i did pick up some at the jackinthebox drive through

i left that sunny afternoon rooftop so revitalized, thinking there is good in the world, that when i got home i made sure the cubs were about to be tivoed as they were squaring off against sammy who was trying to get his 600th home run

and i walked to the grocery store because when youre 100 or over you should get your walking in, particularly if you tend to sit around on your couch all day “working”, and i bought a whole pre-cooked chicken, and many cookies, and i walked home and i ate half of the chicken with just a knife.

when i get whole or half chickens i often find myself playing a weird little quiet game of can you eat a chicken with just a knife.

i always lose.

because i have no ads going right now. and because i dont owe anyone shit,

this summer this busblogs going to be all nswf all summer long.

oh i cant read you at work now tony?

sorry baby.

art has always leaned more towards the nipple than the bible so see ya in the fall.

until then summer beings with mrs maggie gillenhall and her little baby.

secretary was one of the hottest movies id ever seen, with my pants on. and whoever that little kid is, he wont appreciate that movie because who wants to see their mom on all fours?

paris hilton will be in jail now 11 days.

how have you grown in the last 11 days?

today i got out of the house and did some photo journalism.

i talked to a bunch of people who had been sitting in line since saturday so they could get the new white stripes record.

but better than that, the first 200 people who got the record at that store also got free tickets to see the white stripes play at that store

but it wasnt any regular old store, it is the famous tower records on sunset

famous for being a place where cool instores like weezer played occassionally

and where axl rose worked while he was trying to get it together in la.

talking to the people made me realize that i have to get my camera working properly.

not my digital cam, my video cam.

the other night a young lady came over and said i want you to video me giving you a lap dance and i said im sorry but my batteries are dead and i dont know where the charger is and i dont know how to upload the iso files and i dont know how to edit it

and she said hows a young exhibitionist gonna make it if even tony pierce wont exploit me properly?

and thats when i realized that this summer should be nsfw

and that i should figure out my camera situation.

tomorrow im seeing sea wolf.