there is politics, there’s opinion, and then there are facts

bill walton and the chickenthe first one is a game. people lie. people root for their “side”. people do things that are sometimes against the best interest of the people they live around.

then comes opinion, someone’s point of view. someone’s ideas. someone’s take.

and finally theres science. actual statistics. numbers. irrefutable evidence.

it may not be easy for everyone to be ok with the fact that black people are killed by cops at a higher rate than white people, but it is a fact that it is happening right now in the USA.

you can have an opinion about that fact, and you might be able to politicize that fact if you want, but just like how right now it’s summer and the year is 2016, cops are killing black people. period.

president obama could politicize this if he wanted to. and some presidents loved politicizing things. i suppose he could try to overreact, but the thing about this president is he does the opposite of flipping out. he’s chill. he works quietly. remember when bin laden died? it happened like a thief in the night.

i dont know who is putting the fear in some peoples minds that obama is going to invoke martial law, but the last time a president did that in a wide spread way was when honest abe did it right before the civil war. we’re having issues right now, but aint no civil war happening. even if trump wins. (which he wont)

everyone needs to chill. everyone needs to look at the facts and see what we can do about this.

but the first step is gonna be sensitive. people are going to have to ask tough questions from law enforcement and they’re going to have to look deep inside. we all know being a cop is an incredibly tough and dangerous job. but only recently are people starting to see that being a young black man isnt a cakewalk either. (or an old black man. or a black woman.)

even the NRA is having a hard time saying, “wait you shot a guy because he legally had a gun and told you about it? thats fucked up.”

crazy opinion coming at ya: theyre having a hard time saying it because theyre not used to coming to the defense of black people.

all i know is i dont know.

i dont know if the cops will ever want to look closely at their fears and how it triggers their actions

and i dont know how many black men on the edge are going to snap like that young man in texas who killed all those cops and then the cops blew him up with a robot.

what i believe is God loves us and is looking out for us.

and what i hope is he leads us down the right path

and we do the right thing once we go down it

zulieka’s unstrung

zuliekaan excerpt from her blog this morning:

I watched Freddy in the shower today; he is packed and moving out tomorrow. I think he is relieved. I watched him soap up, closely, measuring his shoulders among other features. I handed him a towel and wanted to dry him off myself, which he hates. I feel like he’s going off to a war zone. I thought I would be relieved too, but I am very sad. I don’t know what it is we are saying goodbye to–I don’t know who he is anymore. I’m sad that we once shared our dreams with each other, and then did not fight together to keep them alive.

The truth is, the separation is going to be easier for him, and even beneficial. He will be relieved of my corrosive criticism. Everyone thinks I’ll be just fine except they are worried that I’m going to be totally broke. My ten-year-old daughter said “Mom, how are you going to pay rent without Dad? I think you’re being naive.”

there was a time when i proudly said how all of my friends who got married were still married. then this one got divorced then that one then over the last couple years a bunch of them split up.

at first i thought that we, many of whom were raised in divorced homes, had figured it out.

but as it turns out, two people, who are hopefully continuing to grow, sometimes grow apart.

i suppose it’s normal to feel a bit like a failure when the happily ever after doesnt come true but in what part of our lives has forever-ever really been forever-ever?

remember when they told us that CDs could never get damaged?

i change my mind a half dozen times on a variety of things while driving from work to home every night: what im going to eat, what im going to drink, what im gonna watch on tv, which playmate im going to woo, which cubs hat im going to wear to bed.

how on earth did we ever expect two people, with equally changeable minds to change in unison?

the only way it would have worked would have been if the pair got married at 18, had kids at 21 and died at 39.

sadly we live a little longer than that these days.

i have seen people i never thought would ever even fight get divorced

and i have seen people who i never thought would last a second date stick together.

life is a crazy random illogical always surprising series of WTFs that sometimes ends with a warm body in your bed forever who you dont hate.

if you can sprinkle some love in there too

then you are the luckiest person on your block.

something tells me that zulieka will soon be filthy with men

who will gladly offer to dole some WTFs her way.

lets hope she chooses to write about it.

if i get shot and killed by a cop and it is on video

Screen Shot 2016-07-06 at 10.12.26 PMand if it shows that i wasnt doing anything wrong

either i was selling cds or cigarettes

or i was stopped because my taillight was out

even though my taillight was not out.

and if in the video two cops are on top of me

and one of them yells

GUN!

(which is the new n-word)

and if they then shoot me and i die

and if they pull a gun out of my pocket

and if having a gun in your pocket is legal

and reasonable when you consider how dangerous it is for a black man to remain alive these days

and if the cops dont even have to stand trial for my untimely death,

do me this favor.

do not remember me.

do not have a riot in my name.

do not have protests, and debates, and insist that the chief of police or any of the police be forced to resign.

if the police, in no way, have to admit that they were wrong to kill me,

do me this favor,

and you have to because this is my wish

get me a simple headstone

and on it, inscribe these words

black lives dont matter.

and thats all.

because thats what they are telling us every day and every night

from minnesota to baton rouge.

from st. louis to baltimore

from new york to los angeles.

if our lives dont matter, neither do our names.

so leave mine out of it.

today is National Kissing Day, so let’s rejoice

me jeanine and welch kissingmy first kiss: Angela Romano in 6th grade after a fortuitious spin the bottle turn. We went into the bathroom, turned off the lights, and bumped heads. We turned back on the lights, repositioned, turned off the lights and whammo! my life was changed forever.

a couple of summers later i kissed sisters. first Diane at the pool then her sister Heather at a party about a week later. when it rains it pours.

my first time kissing a girlfriend was mary. i needed to build up courage so i waited for something good to play on the car radio. when Tom Petty’s “Breakdown” came on, it was game on.

girls ive kissed in mexico: two – jeanine (pictured) and the truest, maybe a decade apart.

girls ive kissed in europe: two – the dutch girl and the truest. one in holland the other in several countries.

girls i kissed in college: maybe 20 of them?

girls i kissed in college while high off cough syrup while rolling down a hill: kelly o’mara at anisq’Oyo’ Park

kissed a chinese girl? yes: in frisco

kissed a japanese girl? yes: Linda, in IV

kissed a korean girl? yes: in LA

kissed an indian girl? yes: in frisco

kissed a black girl and a white girl? yes: oh Canada!

kissed nine girls in the same night? isla vista baby!

kissed a girl in the car and then told her she was bad at kissing? yes, twice

kissed a jewish girl? oh yea

kissed a redhead? come on of course!

first time a girl bit my tongue on purpose: myra

kissed a girl with a tongue pierce? san diego

kissed a girl i later regretted?

no ragrets

 

there was a time when the cubs could barely justify one all star

kunta

yesterday it was announced that they would be sending SEVEN Cubs to San Dieger

next week for the All Star Game:

their entire infield, their center fielder

and their two best pitchers.

in a perfect world id be going too, but tickets are ridiculously expensive.

and also i hate san diego and i hope if falls into the sea.

and also they are making the players wear uniforms reminiscent of the 1984 Padres

which is on top of my list of reasons for hating san diego

and hoping it sinks into a sweaty goob of magma.

but still i would love to go to the game but

i will instead watch it on tv

like a proper american

without having to leave my humble abode.

(still sorta hoping for magma)

happy birthday, America

Happy birthday to my favorite country
a place where a man born to an African man and a midwestern woman
can go to Harvard, run for president, become president
and despite unprecedented Congressional cockblocking and cowardice,
miraculously pull a nation from a deliberating recession,
while killing tyrants, ending wars,
making the nation freer, healthier, and more prosperous
with style and eloquence.
As a Cub fan I look the other way when I remember he’s a Sox fan.
One day I hope his detractors can look the other way
when they remember
he’s not like them.
yours in rock,
busblog

chuck klosterman was on tv, talking about creativity

art

he said in order to induce creativity he gets himself bored.

he said our problems is that are instantly entertained within seconds thanks to the internet.

he said the best ways, though, to get your mind going is to

go on a long boring walk

with no music in your ears

and no phone in your hand.

what will happen is you might write a little song, you might think of a good topic for a book

you might think of all the things you shoulda said to that one babe

right before she cut off the light

and i thought maybe thats why i think of so many good things in the shower

its the one time when theres not a phone in front of me.

i had such a good day yesterday i could cry

kanpai

it started out with me getting to interview this guy who has made movie posters for decades.

designs, art directs, sketches, creates, pitches and then makes some of your favorite movie posters

he’s worked with spielberg, saul bass, schwarezenneger, ron howard, you name em.

i was all, i hear ron howard is a monster IRL

people like jokes.

then i started driving.

on thursday uber had some technical problems. neither the drivers or the passengers could use the app

so i switched over to lyft where because of the surge of new businesses, the prices were multiplied

to fit demand. it was great. doubly great because lyft is offering me a bonus right now

because soon they will introduce their luxury car level of pricing and they want me to get ready

so i think i get double the fare no matter what the fare is, so needless to say ive been driving lyft.

most drivers who do both say the lyft passenger is nicer and more laid back and its sorta true.

tommy burrito

i never met any passengers like Bobby Tortilla on Uber. So thanks Lyft.

Bobby is a heavy metal stage manager who told me some of the best stories.

We both talked about some weird ass times at Irvine Meadows.

I told him about sneaking into the ACDC / Queensryche show in ’86 where while they were playing Operation Mindcrime we traversed across the abandoned Lion Country Safari and eventually hopped the fence into the rock

And he told me about being chased by a cop and a K9 while carrying a twelve pack of Coors Light – a story that we both agreed would make an excellent music video.

He told me that he was going to be doing a show where Alice Cooper is playing and I told him about “Supermench” and he was stoked to hear about it. When I dropped him off there were two white vans in his driveway. He told me one was the old one and one is the new one. If those tour vans could talk.

Drove a shy french girl from one side of town to the other. She was here for two weeks, staying in a tall apartment building in West LA where I had previously picked up 5 swedish girls and while I was waiting for her there were two scantily clad black girls and if i was still in the LA news biz i’d stick my nose into that building, because what the

tonight i will be driving more Lyft because Uber still hasnt paid me my bonus from last week and they know theyre wrong and wont even answer my emails, pretending that Manilla celebrates the fourth of july.

but the best was lunch.

i had just dropped off this young lady at LAX who was flying to vancouver for the weekend. it took us a half hour to get from the venice blvd chase drive thru next to the cvs next to where the Good Hurt used to be next to where theres a bowling alley i think. it took us a half hour to get from there to the airport door.

so i figured, im not on a bonus, i dont have to be super hustling,

so i did something i never do, i went to kanpai and sat at the sushi bar and just treated myself.

they have a lunch menu before 6pm of enough food the fill you up for sure.

i paid $45 after tip and it was seriously the best lunch ive had all year.

i nearly cried in the parking lot.

happy canada day, america

canada cookies

for most americans, Canada is that place UP THERE that we never visit, barely think aboot and foolishly ignore

but thanks to blogging, i have made friends, kissed girls, drank beers, eaten poutine, and even had the pleasure of devouring Beaver Tails all while saying

why didnt anyone tell me about all of this before.

the idea that canada is nothing more than igloos and hockey rinks and beautiful women and eskimos is only half true

there are also Tim Hortons on every block, government run liquor stores, coins used as actual money, and french used as an actual language

the people say sorry a lot, they are super sweet, and the queen walks down the street during hockey season and gives high fives to the townfolk whenever a goal is scored.

i have had the great good pleasure of visiting americas hat several times and i am overdue for another excellent adventure and i must tell you, america:

poutinecanada is also america minus the dingleberries

in vancouver i saw a marijuana store run by hells angels

in toronto i ice skated outside in the snow and everyone, even the children were drunk off love (and molsons)

in ottowa i ate the most delicious indian food and saw the most beautiful gargoyles

in kingston i ate poutine at a kfc and i let out a moan so loud that they gave me a free cookie but told me i had to leave, soorry.

in barrie i soaked in a hot tub with lesbians as thick snowflakes lazily fell upon our heads

in quebec city i felt like i was in a runaway neighborhood of paris that was miraculously transported across the globe

and in montreal i proposed to a girl who said, first lets eat some smoked meats and we danced next to a brick wall while grafitti artists expertly painted our blurry forms

i have been harassed at the border, i have seen fireworks on a river, i have seen baseball played in a dome

i even slept for a night in a honeymoon suite overlooking niagra falls and i wondered,

why does america have buffalo when we could have had all of this?

don cherry, geddy lee, matthew good, neil young, mike meyers, pamela anderson, wayne gretzky

and now justin trudeau’s wife

should all be honorary americans

and by that i mean they should be given a gun and be exempt from paying taxes.

happy canada day, my favorite country in america that doesnt speak even a little bit spanish

unless theyre on vacation in cuba.