thanks to the miracle of blogging we are lucky to know general patrick j. pitt

leader of the free world

often you will see us tease or kid or make fun of our good pal, but it’s completely out of love, a brotherly love, if you will.

i know if i lived in toronto i would be bffs with pitt and fil and raymi and christie and all the others up there but something tells me that mr pitt and fil and i would cause an ungodly amount of terror on the great white north.

therefore i think it was wise that the good lord separated us, much like he scattered the jews who were building the tower of babel. too much rock in too concentrated of a square footage is bad-age.

which brings us to todays squarefootage of rock.

you may recall that last year around this time rear admiral pitt fund-raised a large amount of money for my african brothers and sisters so that they could have sports equipment out in the jungles of the deepest dark. the theory, as i understand it is, just because kids are poor doesnt mean that they shouldnt be allowed to play.

thus Right to Play is one of my favorite charities because it takes money from generous donors and distributes athletic equipment to the poor so that they might have a tad more joy in their lives.

then pitt runs some crazy marathon and comes home sweaty to his beautiful bride.

i dont understand that portion of it, but i assume its a canadian thing.

either way i gave till it hurt last year and survived somehow, so i gave again this year, and i invite you all to do the same. for the kids!

to help the kids in africa, click here and then click under the thermometer that says Give a Gift. never mind that the thermometer says 100%, thats a lie, 100% of the kids in africa do not have bowling balls. YET!

fotos by philogynist

how is it 433am

how is biggie smalls still on.

how is the fire still blazin.

how are the windows still hanging. how is my hat still on.

how are these ladies just leaving.

i might be old but im not that old.

i might be lame but not tonight.

i might be over but not yet.

i might still be a long shot, and a good bet.

these girls came over and dissed prtty much everyone i knew. it was hilarious. you can do better tony. that girl is a ho. that girl is broken.

that girl probably did her father.

the whole time i was drinking baileys from the bottle to the glass to my lips to gods ears. hip hop the whole time. fire going the whole time. cigarettes wine water wheatthins with sundried tomato and basil, the whole time.

their club clothes on, their eyes hanging, their cherries glowing, their glasses emptying, their opinions blaring.

i laughed i questioned i learned i laughed.

compliments and insults compliments and short skirts.

the whole night went so fast mostly cuz it started at midnight, the right time, the bar emptied so fast the ride home went so nice.

i dont know what all the fakers in my life did tonight but i bet it wasnt one bit of what i did.

i dont know what the liars on the blogoshpere were up to but i bet it wasnt the one two.

and tonight when i finally get to say my prayers you know im gonna give thanks and thanks like i was tom hanks.