but sadly i hafta be across town

the last time i went to such an affair i met a young lady whos name will be withheld because shes guilty.

mostly guilty of being at the wrong place at the right time.

gorgeous. way too young lookin. way too into it.
almost right away she hissed be my boyfriend and i will give you anything you want all the time.

and ive got a mirror or two in my many mansions. i know what im working with. nobody should be wanting to give me anything that i want all the time.

and she had no idea that what i wanted was food and lots of it. girl of my dreams woulda said on monday i’ll make you homemade fatburgers, tuesday homemade in n out, wednesdays big macs with xtra cheese, thursday turduckens…

shed say and there will be pies.

and shed say and we’ll have two kegs. one of beer. and one of grape soda.

if chickie had said anything even close to that i never woulda done the things i did to her.

one night we were fighting right as the date was starting.

i was all what exactly is going through your mind lil girl?

i was all, i will turn this car around and drop you back into your socalledlife

legs for days

lip gloss

bows here and there

and i turned the car around and she was shocked. probably every man she knew just rolled over for her, and like i said if there was mention of pie ida rolled over too. thats how good a kisser she was.

instead i flipped a bee and before we could get a block back her pout was gone and her hand was in mine.

i cant believe im as old as i am. still not as old as bukowski was when he did all the good ones.

or harry when he hit his stride.

you hafta say those things to yourself or you’ll cry.

just so i can do this.

and yes im glad the hand is that of a brotha

this weekend

loved it.

people clapped at the end. in fact co-workers who saw it at The Grove said there were standing ovations going on.

it was funny. gotta give it that. i dont know if i woulda leapt to my feet at the end but i did walk out with a huge smile on my face.

ive had pretty good luck with movies these last few months. only a few clinkers.

what i liked about Hot Tub was the music was great – they even used “I Will Dare” from the Replacements. but mostly i enjoyed the fact that it was clearly for adults and we went to a 10pm screening which was packed

and people were ready for something raunchy and we all hooted and howled with every dirty joke or silly situation.

im sad that it will be considered a flop because it was the type of movie that there needs to be more of: smart, funny, outrageous, ridiculous, and sorta dirty.

if you want something light and funny its the way to go